Wednesday July 30th 2025 "A good doctor's words can be a healing balm in themselves, can't they!"

Isn't it kind of comforting when a doctor assures you, in a calm, friendly voice, that you'll be "as right as rain in a day or two", and adds, with a smile, that you'll be "completely back to normal, if there is such a thing (!)".

I almost think his (or her!) words of comfort are as good as a pill just in themselves, if that makes sense! It sounds crazy, I admit, but did you see yesterday's local "Onion News for East Hampshire", which my medium-to-long-suffering wife Lois and I "devoured", as per usual (!), from cover to cover? 

Get your copy of yesterday's print version out of the trash and at once. Do it now! And check out page 94 !

And mine and Lois's guess is that Megan's pain did disappear yesterday, and we believe that purely and simply because the news coming out of Betty Mundy's Bottom this morning makes no mention of Megan's case. So, in other words, just one more triumph for local medic Wayne McMahon, and one more proof, if proof were needed, of "the power of positive thinking", as writer Norman Vincent Peale once put it! 

Norman Vincent Peale's game-changing

"The Power of Positive Thinking"

We don't know for sure about Megan, but, certainly, life for Lois and me is slowly getting back to normal today, after the whirlwind of the last couple of weeks, which, admittedly, felt a little like being run over by a 15 ton steamroller, at times (!).  Our particular "steamroller" was a 16-day visit by our dear daughter Sarah, her husband Francis, and their 12-year-old twin daughters Lily and Jessica, who all flew in from Perth, Australia on July 19th and flew out again yesterday, leaving our house at the unearthly hour of 6am for the drive to London's Heathrow Airport and the 18-hour nonstop flight back to Perth.  

flashback to yesterday: our daughter Sarah, husband Francis and their

12-year-old twin daughters Lily and Jessica leave our house at the unearthly hour

of 6am for the drive to Heathrow Airport and the 18-hour flight home to Australia

Today, the first full day after Sarah and family's departure, there is laundry to be done, certainly, and "in spades", what with all the bedsheets etc! However, after another batch of washed clothes gets hung out on our rotary washing-line, Lois and I can at last resume our normal pattern of a daily walk in the morning followed by an afternoon in bed, a pattern which we were forced to abandon while our visitors were staying here - for obvious reasons !!!!

So, this morning, as soon as we can get that washing out, we're back in the long grass of Old Man Lowsley's Farm, before you can say "Jack Robinson", which is nice! And today, we even log a sighting of a plucky little lathyrus odoratus, or "sweet pea" to you and me (!), amongst all the bracken etc, a sighting officially confirmed by the shiny new "Plantnet" app on my little Samsung, so it must be right haha !!!!

today for Lois and me is "the first day of the rest of our lives" (!),

as we wash and dry all the dirty sheets, and then go for a bracing

walk over Old Man Lowsley's Farm, checking on the wild flowers

And suddenly, our life together becomes 'all normal' again, and all's right with the world after our afternoon in bed, at least!

We're feeling a bit naughty this afternoon because, on our morning walk, we had picked a few blackberries just growing there on the bushes, and I'm afraid we gobbled them down on the spot, somewhat guiltily, I have to add!

"Psst - want a couple of blackberries?", asks Lois, whispering 

in my ear. And then she adds, to reassure me, "Nobody's gonna see!!!!"

But, "Why the guilt, just over a bunch of blackberries, Colin?", I hear you cry!

Well, seeing as how you're obviously "gagging" to know (!), it's like this...! While Sarah and family were with us during the last couple of weeks, we were made to listen to some of our son-in-law Francis's educational "health and safety briefings", mainly directed to the twins, but which we later discovered were also intended for Lois and me (!).

flashback to Thursday: our son-in-law Francis, on the Thames Embankment,

London, giving a "health and safety" briefing to our daughter Sarah

and their 12-year-old twin daughters at the start of our day-trip to London 

Lois told me later that, during the family's 16-day visit here, she had picked some blackberries from a bush in the park and she had offered them to the twins, only to be told by Francis that he'd "rather they were washed first", and Lois told me she had felt absolutely crushed (!).  

And, she told me also, that it made it even more crushing to know that Francis was probably right, as usual !!!!

flashback to last Saturday, and the twins' 12th birthday: Francis giving a quick 

"health and safety" briefing before the lighting of candles on the birthday cake

Lois and I love our son-in-law Francis dearly, but, although not a schoolteacher himself, he's the son of two school headteachers, and you know what teachers are like! And I should certainly know that very well too, as the son of a headteacher myself, would you believe! And Lois and I think that Francis would probably have become a headteacher too, if he hadn't been held back by his unfortunate dyslexia.

Poor Francis !!!!!!!

20:00 And this evening, for Lois and me, another sign of the return of normalcy, is that we get a chance to watch some ordinary "telly", which we haven't had the chance to do while Sarah and family were around. 

While we were in a charity shop in Farnham the other day, over the county line in Surrey, Lois had secretly bought the twins a DVD from the "Nanny McPhee" series, the kids fantasy films starring Emma Thompson, Colin Firth and Angela Lansbury etc - you know the one !!! 

You know !!!!! After the unexpected death of his wife, widower Colin Firth hires a nanny with magical powers (Emma Thompson) to help control his 7 mischievous children - you must have heard about it!!!

Lois thought the film would be "just the ticket" to watch with the twins one evening, but she was again "crushed" to find out that they'd rather see episodes of reality show "The Apprentice", their favourite series, fronted by the terrifying Lord Sugar, and all about contestants trying to start up their own businesses etc.

What a crazy world we live in !!!!!!

Tonight it's just Lois and me on our ownsome (!), so we can watch a programme from the new series of Only Connect, which tests lateral thinking, and which is fronted by the even more terrifying Victoria Coren Mitchell (!). 

At last something to give our brains a work-out - hurrah!!!

Can you spot the link between these 4 seemingly unrelated things? One contestant thinks he can!

Well, he's sort of right, it turns out, but it's specifically November 11th, that's the key date for them all. Lois and I didn't know about the Catholic Northern Europe thing or about Polish Independence Day. We knew about the two minutes silence for the dead in two world wars, but the real mystery item is the South Korean custom of eating 11 packets of chocolate sticks on that date every year. 

Presenter Victoria Coren-Mitchell explains:

 

The idea is for children to see how many of these Pepero chocolate sticks you can eat on 11/11 between 11:11 in the morning and 12 hours later. The image is that of children trying to grow up tall and thin like a Pepero stick. 

There's a problem with all this, however, as Victoria indicates:

What a crazy world we live in !!!! [You've done that one once already today! - Ed]

22:00 Back into bed, but with half an eye on our smartphones again: our other daughter, Alison, is jetting off from London's Gatwick Airport to Mauritius tonight, with husband Edward and their 3 teenage kids Josie (18), Rosalind (17) and Isaac (14), for a fortnight's holiday.

Yikes!!!! 

"Has the whole world gone stark, staring mad?", we ask ourselves!

[No, just you two 'noggins', I think you'll find ! - Ed]

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!

Tuesday July 29th 2025 "Dear Reader, do YOU sometimes feel lonely, especially on karaoke nights at your local pub?"

Dear Reader, are YOU lonely? Do you long for a partner to sing man-woman duets with, on karaoke nights at YOUR local pub? 

Well, if so, you're not alone (no pun intended!!!!), at least to judge from this morning's Onion News print edition page 94 - check it now. No, do it NOW haha!!!!!

Poor lonely karaoke enthusiasts !!!!!

But the story gave me and my medium-to-hard-pressed wife Lois a bit of a much-needed chuckle this morning, when we read, later on today, an email from Steve, our American brother-in-law, containing his selection of this week's most amusing Venn diagrams.

Check out amusing Venn diagram no. 2 in Steve's selection - see below !!!!!

Farage mimicking Trump - "Loud and slightly behind the beat" - that's "our Nigel" to a tee, isn't it, to be honest !!!!

And friends, wouldn't be great to see Nigel and Donald exercising their vocal chords together (or nearly together !!!!) on one of the classic karaoke duets, like "Summer Nights" or "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" ? Am I right? Or am I right!" !!!!!!

We've watched Donald doing numbers with (or on !!!) some of his closest colleagues, the likes of Jeffrey Epstein,  Rupert Murdoch and Vladimir Putin. 

Surely it's time, now or never, for Nigel and Donald to step up to the mike together?

Nigel [sings plaintively]: "Don't Go Breaking My Heart, [Donald]!", to which

Donald [sings reassuringly in reply], "I Couldn't If I Tried, [Nigel]!"

So step up to the mike, Nigel !!! And if you don't do it, I think we should be told why, don't you?

[That's really more than enough whimsy, Colin! - Ed]

Well, Lois and I need a bit of a chuckle today, because, sadly, our dear daughter Sarah and her family have come to the end of their 16-day stay with us here in rural, semi-leafy Liphook, Hampshire, UK, and are jetting off around midday back to their home in Perth, Australia. Sob, sob !!!!!!!

Lois and I look out of our bedroom window at 5:30 am, would you believe, and see Sarah's husband Francis already loading up the family's rental car for the drive to London's Heathrow Airport. 

Lois and I look out of our bedroom window at 5:30am

to see our son-in-law Francis loading up the boot

of their rental car for the drive to London's Heathrow Airport:

in the background can be seen the nearby Radford Park, where Lois and I

took our twin granddaughters just yesterday - sob sob !!!!!

Their flight doesn't leave till 11:55am, but Francis is keen to get going early - not only will he have to negotiate London's morning rush-hour on the M25 etc, but he'll have a hard time explaining to the car rental company all the dents from Saturday, when he tried to drive under a car park barrier in Guildford, Surrey, just as it was coming down.

Oops !!!

However, all too soon, they're saying goodbye to us, leaving Lois and me "alone again - naturally" (copyright Gilbert O'Sullivan) - only exacerbating the existing so-called "loneliness epidemic" (see Onion story above !!!!) !!!!!

our dear daughter Sarah, husband Francis, and their 12-year-old twin daughters

Lily and Jessica leave us at the end of their 16-day stay here, and start on the 40-mile

drive to London's Heathrow Airport for their midday flight to Perth, Australia

Sob sob (again!) !!!!!! Yes, "On Our Own Again (Naturally)"

Poor us !!!!!!

"Alone Again (Naturally)" - Yours Truly and my medium-to-hard-pressed 

wife Lois (a.k.a. Mrs Yours Truly) - a recent picture

14:00 There's now nothing left for me and Lois to do now but to spend the afternoon on a long, comfortable shower, followed by about 18 hours in bed, "fuelled" by some of the left-over snacks from Sarah and family's time with us. Well, wouldn't you, if you had the chance?

Every so often, however, we "take a break" (!), just to check on Sarah and family's progress, using the shiny-new FlightAware app on our "his and hers" smartphones (!). 

By 9:30pm British Summer Time (BST) the plane has got through the Middle East - always a relief, because there are so many "dodgy" countries round there, aren't there. What a crazy world we live in !!!!! 

By two in the morning BST their plane is safely on its way across the Indian Ocean, landing in Perth around 5:15 am BST - 12:15 pm local time, only about a quarter of an hour behind schedule, which isn't bad. But they must be feeling pretty rough, travelling economy through the night. 

Knowing the twins, however, they're sure to be as bouncy as ever, and looking forward to seeing their young Australian-American friends Samara and Gianna, plus American mum Charissa and Australian dad Todd, at whose house they'll be spending Wednesday night.  

flashback to June 2021: the twins (centre), near their home in Perth, 

Western Australia, photographed here with their Australian-American 

"besties" - Samara (right) and Samara's little sister, Gianna (left)

Lois and I have had so much fun with Sarah and family here in Liphook over the last 16 days, but if we're honest, we have to say that we're also totally exhausted by it all. 

Well we are 79, you know! [You don't say! - Ed]

Starting Wednesday, we'll be able now to get back to our normal routine,  going for proper walks, watching proper "telly", also wandering about the house improperly dressed, having meals when we want, not queuing for the bathroom, not bothering to lock the bathroom door, etc etc.

the bolt on our bathroom door - a recent picture

We'll get our living-room back - it's been serving as Sarah's bedroom. She's been sleeping there on a folding camp-bed, due to Francis's current health problems, which are giving him disturbed nights. And we'll also get our kitchen table back, which has been serving as Sarah's "office". While with us, she's been continuing to work at her two jobs - as an accountant for a firm in Perth, Australia, as well as being an accountant for a firm in Evesham, UK. 

Poor Sarah has had to "requisition" our living-room as a bedroom and 

our kitchen dining-table as her "office space" - what madness !!!!

Also, Lois and I will be able to go back to "being naughty" (!), whenever we want to. During his family's visit here, our son-in-law Francis, when giving "health and safety" advice to his wife and family, had a tendency to include Lois and me in his instructions (well he is the son of two headteachers!), giving us all the benefit of his wide reading of the health and safety pages in the topical magazines he reads, so "Kudos!" to him, fair enough! 

flashback to Thursday: our son-in-law Francis, on the Thames Embankment,

London, giving his wife and family some sensible "health and safety" 

pointers at the start of our recent day-trip to London 

Will Lois and I act "healthily and safely" from now on, or will we just "let rip"? Well, we are 79, you know. [Do stop saying that! - Ed] So why not take the risk at our advanced age! We might as well enjoy ourselves, at least till our luck runs out - that's what we say haha !!!!!

[I wouldn't trust you two "noggins" to remember any health and safety rules for more than about 5 minutes, let alone keep to them! - Ed]

Despite everything, Lois and I have loved every single minute of Sarah and family's visit, and we can't wait for the next one - hopefully in 2026. 

Bring it on !!!!!!

Will this do?

[Oh just go back to sleep! - Ed]

22:00 We stay in bed - zzzzzzzz!!!!!!

Monday July 28th 2025 "It's a hard life when you're intelligent, isn't it, be you man or be you ape haha !!!"

It's a hard life for an intelligent ape isn't it - it's bad enough for an intelligent human, and I should know haha! Did you see that story in this morning's local Onion News For East Hampshire? If you're "out of area" (OOA) you may have missed it, so here's a quick digest!!!

Poor Bobo!!!!

And certainly there was no sign of Bobo this morning at the GoApe Treetop Adventure Centre, in North East Hampshire's Alice Holt Forest, where Bobo is rumoured to spend her free days, so my guess is she's still sulking. But I'm sure she'll "come round" given time, and do the Radio Times crossword with me, just like she used to do in the old days (!). 

"Me Bobo, You Bozo!" is what Bobo says to me, whenever I drop by with my copy of Radio Times! 

And "Bobo's Your Auntie!" - that's another one of Bobo's catchphrases, with its humorous "twist" on the overused "Bob's Your Uncle" exclamation that Lois and I use all the time, to put it mildly !!!!

[That's enough Bobo catchphrases! - Ed]

And just joking there about the crossword by the way - Bobo is clearly not yet up to the level of my lovely wife Lois, who helps me with the Radio Times crossword, and with so many things both day and night (!), but just give Bobo a bit more time, is what I say !!!

Bobo with pages from the puzzle book I bought her

[That's enough whimsy! - Ed]

Even in Bobo's absence, the Treetop Adventure Centre is, for me and my medium-to-hard pressed wife Lois, a very good place to relax today, in what the locals call "The Forest", with our current Australian visitors: our daughter Sarah, her husband Francis, and their 12-year-old twins Lily and Jessica, from Perth, Western Australia. 

Yours Truly in the spotlight again, as our Australian visitors - our 

daughter Sarah, plus Sarah's husband Francis, and our twin granddaughters 

Lily and Jessica - all show their tickets at the GoApe ticket office, in Hampshire's

Alice Holt Forest, with my medium-to-hard pressed wife Lois looking on.

It's their last day in England before flying back to their home in Perth, Australia, after their 16-day holiday with Lois and me, here in Liphook, Hampshire, so what better place than a Treetop Challenge to blow off some of the cobwebs that have "accrued" to them on their 16-day visit to "the old country" (!).

It's a fun day at the GoApe, but tinged with sadness for Lois and me, because we know that early tomorrow morning, our little Australian family will be leaving us to drive to London's Heathrow Airport for their punishing 18-hour non-stop flight home to Perth.

Sob, sob !!!!!

It's also true, however, that Lois and I are actually feeling totally exhausted by today, with all the unaccustomed fun and noise going on in our house - it's not that we don't normally have fun when we're on our own, and not that we don't normally make a noise at the same time (!) - but you'll know what I mean, if you've ever been 79 and had a family of four including two energetic "young rascals" arriving from 9000 miles away and suddenly "descending" on you (!).

So it's very much a bitter sweet occasion tonight as we eat our last full meal with them all in our little back garden here in Liphook.

 a bitter-sweet occasion as Lois and I have our last meal with our

little Australian family: they'll be leaving here at 6 am

tomorrow morning to fly home to Perth, Australia

Sob sob (again ) !!!!!

Will this do?

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzz!!!!!