It's embarrassing, isn't it, when our friends realise we know some of the local menus almost word-for-word, even in the correct order sometimes, suggesting a life dedicated to crass self-indulgence. Like this local man who's hitting all the headlines "in these here parts" this morning [source: Onion News for East Hampshire] !
I think personally that old Bob Morse has already let far too much 'slip' to that suspicious co-worker, but we've all been there, with the possible exception of Yours Truly, and my "Mrs Yours Truly", my light-to-moderate wife, Lois, who have often already forgotten what we want when the waitress approaches with her pad and paper, which is embarrassing, to put it mildly!!!
my light-to-moderate wife Lois and me - a recent picture
Today of all days we don't want to hesitate and stutter when giving the waitress our order. It's our wedding anniversary, and we're celebrating it at the Links Tavern in our new home town of Liphook, Hampshire.
And as a precaution we come armed with a print of the menu we downloaded online, and with our choices already ringed, plus a post-it note with my credit card pin number on, just in case! Well, we are 79, you know!
[You must stop telling us that!" - Ed]
the Links Tavern where we have our anniversary lunch today
with [inset] - some of the lovely cards received from family and friends
As always we've booked the table for 12 noon, the earliest time possible, to maximise time in bed this afternoon, where we can unwind a bit and sleep off some of those chips hopefully (!). And hopefully also, our lunch today hasn't been too unhealthy, but you're allowed to be a bit "wicked" on your anniversary, aren't you - that's what we say!
[You devils! - Ed]
But I wonder how much of our lunch was that "microplastic" stuff that people keep talking about these days - it certainly wasn't mentioned explicitly on the menu (!).
And so that's something else we find ourselves "chewing over" in bed today, amongst other things (!). Our monthly copy of "Which?", the consumer magazine, which plopped through our letterbox the other day, contained some alarming facts about the microplastics we're all allegedly ingesting and inhaling every day. And we decide today to try to do one thing every month to fight back and lower the risk to us.
Our first move will be to ditch the colourful plastic chopping boards we got from Argos, which apparently leach microplastics.
OUT go our colourful plastic chopping-boards from Argos
Instead we're going to buy a couple of wooden ones from Amazon: the first of which we'll use for meat and on the other side fish, and the second one we'll use for veg and something else, I forget what. They'll be made from birch wood - apparently the best woods are birch, maple and walnut, which don't tend to crumble or flake when wet.
After all nobody wants a mouthful of splinters in their food do they - be fair! If anything, splinters must taste worse than microplastics, I should imagine!
And Amazon are even letting me put my own amusing customised message on each board so we'll remember what they're for, which is nice!
Move two will be to ditch tea-bags when they finally run out and opt instead for loose-leaf tea, because they even put a lot of microplastics in tea-bags, allegedly.
What a crazy world we live in!!!
And tonight, to round off the day, we see the first programme in TV chef Jamie Oliver's new series "Eat Yourself Healthy".
We like Jamie's emphasis on protein intake, which is important for old codgers like us, to stop us falling over (!), and tonight Jamie showcases for the cameras his protein-rich meatball and roasted veg special. We worked out the other day that Lois needs 66g of protein a day and I need 77g, which is easy to remember. Jamie's meal gives you 33g, which is half Lois's requirements there and then, right off the bat.
Bob's Your Uncle!
But blimey! Lois and I have always worked on the old theory of our "five-a-day", when it comes to fruit and veg, but apparently we're out of date: that's old-fashioned nowadays, Jamie says. The smart money is now on your "ten-a-day".
What madness !!!! And the justification sounds a bit vague to us. However, when Lois thinks it over she decides that we are probably getting 7 or 8 a day already, so it won't be too much of a sweat to squeeze a couple more in, hopefully!!!
We also like Jamie's promotion of blueberries, which apparently aid blood flow to the brain: something which will prove useful next time we go upstairs and then realise we've forgotten what we came up there for - that particular "old codgers" bugbear (!).
And yet... and yet... the bottom line is clear - eat more blueberries!!!
And Dr Lamport has proved in his labs that volunteers show clear improvements in their mental and physical reactions just one hour after eating their way through a bowl of blueberries.
Lois and I are pleased at Lamport's results, because we love blueberries anyway, and we already eat, like, a ton of them every day, starting with a handful on our morning cereal and then including them in desserts both after lunch and after dinner, so that one's "sorted", as far as we're concerned!
[How long, then, Colin, before we see results? Just saying! - Ed
Will this do?
[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]
22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!
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