Yes, Friends, are YOU a couch-potato, looking for an easy route back to total fitness? A lot of us are, aren't we.
And getting back to fitness after a period of "couch-potato-hood" has always been a bit of a difficult "journey". hasn't it, but now it's never been easier, I'm happy to report. And it's all thanks to good old modern technology.
Don't just take that on trust from me, by the way - it's all over the press this morning, but illustrated the most graphically by market leader Onion News, as per usual !!!
[Some sublime use of the English language in your opening paras today, Colin, if I may say so! - Ed]
My weight's down - around 9st 12 lbs (138 lbs or 62.5 kg). Even my height has shrunk by an inch, to only 5'10" (1.78m) in my 'socking' feet ("Language, Timothy haha!") - so my feet must have slimmed down too, which is a nice! Or maybe my head's lost weight!
You see, today I delight my medium-to-long-suffering wife Lois by mowing our front and back lawns for the second time in a month! I can read the pleasure on her face, as she takes this picture of me as a souvenir (see below), and I'm assuming that this photo is probably going to end up in her chunky, and beginning-to-bulge(!) "Colin the Hunk" folder, unless I'm much mistaken !!!!!
flashback to this morning: my medium-to-long-suffering
wife Lois takes this photo of me mowing our lawn.
Awwww! Don't I look cute, even though I say it myself !!!!
But when I look back in my blog, I see that, before this month - April 2025 - I haven't mown our lawn for five and a half years, would you believe. Crazy isn't it.
Little did I know when I wrote these words, back in October 2019, that this would actually be the last time I would mow our lawn for the next 5 and a half years. But now, after two operations, including a hip replacement last April, "Colin the Mower" is well and truly "back in the building", or should I say "back in the garden" (!!!!).
And Lois is pleased too, to put it mildly. She says she finds me at my most attractive when I'm busy in the garden, or "out from under my feet" as she puts it - with a wink (!).
Yes, all in all, things are definitely looking up for me, fitness-wise, even though it doesn't do to boast, as Lois's dear late father Dennis used to say.
Plus, even though I say it myself: I'm also looking better than ever. Still as cute as I ever was, but now also "slim with it".
[Don't kid yourself, Colin, you smug, ugly, unfit bastard!!! - Ed]
me (right), pictured here recently with Lois, and manifestly
"looking as cute as I ever was", in my own words (!!!!)
Yes, and we're both fit as fiddles now, or, at least, as fit as fiddles that haven't been tuned for 10 years, shall we say! Especially Lois....
Lois walks so fast now, she has to wear a sports bra (not shown!) - only kidding, by the way (!). And as for me, for the first time in years, I'm sporting blue jeans with the incredibly slim waist measurement of 34" (86cm), the pair I buy today on our trip to nearby Bordon, Hampshire, also "not shown" (!). Prior to today, I've been slobbing it around in chunky "36-inchers" for at least 10 years, probably more.
us this morning: (top) walking round the local "rec" (recreation ground), Lois speed-walking
in her sports bra (only kidding!!!!) and me lagging behind, catching my breath and
taking photos, and (bottom) us in nearby Bordon this morning, where I buy jeans
with an incredibly slim 34" waist-measurement for the first time in years.
[I'm gong with the 'head' theory here. You must have shed, like, a billion braincells since I've been editing your so-called 'work', Colin! - Ed]
It's all thanks to Lois, by the way, that I've managed get fit, or at least get "a bit less unfit", and it's also thanks to Lois that I've managed to slim down a bit, while still looking incredibly cute, so I've got to give her the credit at this point.
Lois has had to watch her weight over the last 6 months, after being diagnosed as "pre-type-2-diabetic", but she's now been certified as 'out of the danger zone', thanks to her determined persistence with a low-sugar, low-salt, hi-veg diet.
flashback to January: Lois showcasing her latest
diet cookbook "The Glucose Goddess" by Jessie Incauspé
And I've been on Lois's diet as well, simply because it's Lois who prepares most of our meals, my being a bit of a "klutz in the kitchen".
I've never developed adequate cooking skills, and just have to concentrate on mainly the 'hoovering' and the 'taking care of the business and computer' side, as well as the "circling TV programmes in the Radio Times" side of our relationship, which is just as important in my view. Just saying !!!!
But what a 'journey' it's all been!
Will this do?
[You lazy bastard, Colin! - Ed]
22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzz!!!!!
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