Thursday September 30th 2021

10:00 The time for giving my so-called "presentation" is getting close now - only 28 hours 30 minutes to go - yikes!!!! 

It's a talk about "How The Vikings Changed Our Language", and I'm due to give it to members of Lynda's local U3A Middle English Group.

a typical Viking schoolteacher teaching some nicely-brought-up 

Anglo-Saxon children some typically gruesome and horrid Viking words

The problem is that I still don't really know how long the presentation is going to take to deliver. I can't be bothered to write it all out - I'm just going to speak from the slides, but what if there are any awkward questions, or what if I get through the slides too quickly? 

I decide to scribble some "extra bits" in the right-hand margin to fill in some time or deal with some annoying requests for "more detail": I think I can guess what some of the "smart alecs" in the group are going to want chapter and verse about. What madness!

my first two slides - with "extra bits" scribbled in the right-hand margin

I'm starting off with the Goths, which is a good starting point for any talk, especially as I can't think of a joke to open with - damn! Steve, my American brother-in-law, has reminded me that we hear a lot about the Visigoths but not much about the Ostrogoths, so I'm going to make sure I compensate for that deficiency in our education system. 

where the various Gothic tribes ended up - they started out in modern-day 

Sweden or Poland - nobody's quite sure which, 

and they decided they'd find somewhere a bit warmer

I've decided not to include anything about the so-called "Mall-o-goths" who haunt shopping centres to this day. I don't think they were around till much later, but I'll have to check up on that to be sure of my facts here. 

Do Mall-o-goths speak a primitive form of Germanic? It's a primitive something-or-other I believe, I just can't remember exactly what - old age creeping up again!  [I think old age has done more than that in your case! - Ed]

14:45 I drop Lois off near our dental surgery. She has an appointment at 15:10 for the second part of her 3-part course of treatment to have a long crown fitted over several teeth. Luckily most of the worst of the drilling was done in Part 1, so we're hopeful it won't be quite as traumatic as last time.

our dental surgery 

After it's all over Lois gets the receptionist to ring me to say she's ready to come home. She had tried using her mobile but it told her she was out of credit. I pick her up and we come home - she's feeling like she's been through the mill again, and who could blame her? Like me she hates it particularly whenever they take an impression of your teeth - I just want to gag, but she just finds it extremely painful.

She now has 8 days before she has to go again for the third and final part of the course of treatment, which includes fitting the crown. 

It's a pity that our usual dentist Daria is leaving the practice shortly after Lois's last appointment, and moving to another practice on the other side of town. It'll be handier over that side because her partner works in Bristol. But it's a pity for us because we've got to know Daria now - her replacement is going to be another woman, but that's all the detail we know at the moment.

our dentist Daria, seen here in happier times:

"Make mine a large one!" - that was her catchphrase.

We relax on the sofa: Lois has a rooibos tea without milk, and I have my usual extra-strong Earl Grey.

It'll be me on dinner-making duty tonight, that's for sure, and something soft is needed that doesn't need  a lot of chewing. After careful thought I select one of my two signature dishes: jumbo fish-fingers, mash potato and peas. Yum yum!!!!

20:00 We settle down on the couch to watch a bit of TV, the latest programme in Pam Ayres new series about the Cotswolds.

It's nice to see country poetess Pam wandering around her native Cotswolds. I always remember her iconic poem for hard times, "Sling another chair-leg on the fire, Mother".

And it's nice tonight to see Pam visiting the Rococo Garden at Painswick near Stroud, a garden created in 1740 to provide secluded nooks for  so-called "erotic assignations". In a way it's a little bit surprising that they don't create places like that any more today - I don't know the reason for that, but I think we should perhaps be told?

Painswick's Rococo Garden - designed in 1740 for "erotic assignations"

Lois and I visited the Garden in 2003 with Lois's cousin Brian and his wife Ruth. We didn't see anything erotic going on, but I suppose it was the middle of the day. Perhaps the "scene" doesn't get going till after dark maybe?

flashback to August 2003 - we visit the Rococo Garden, Painswick

(left to right) Lois, me, Ruth and Lois's cousin Brian

Happy days !!!!!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!

Wednesday September 29th 2021

06:15 Another start for Lois and me - yesterday we had to get out of bed at 6 am in case the Team Knowhow repair guy for our freezer rang the doorbell, which he could have done at any time between 7am and 10:35am. 

Today Lois gives me a kick at 6 am to remind me we didn't put our general waste and garden waste wheelie-bins and food-waste bins out on the kerb last night - it was raining hard and it was warm and cosy on the sofa, and going outside was just too awful to contemplate. Now I'm having to pay for that decision - damn!!!

a Cheltenham waste disposal truck

(not the one that comes this morning)

09:00 I finish off the "slides" for my so-called presentation, "How the Vikings Changed Our Language", a talk which I'm giving on Friday afternoon on zoom to Lynda's local U3A Middle English group. 

I email the slides out to the group members, so now the die is cast. Almost everything I know is actually on the slides, so in theory the members don't need to hear me stumbling my way through it on zoom, and I shouldn't need to actually give the talk,. However, I think my presence is expected, if somewhat grudgingly, and I'm hoping I can get a good discussion going, if nothing else. 

Well, we'll see!

In my talk I mention "Goths", normally a taboo subject, although I keep away from so-called "Mall-o-Goths".  

And for my talk I've used my primitive graphic skills to do a slide of the Germanic language family tree as it could have looked 2000 years ago, I've included a badly-drawn blue-or-purple circle and arrow to indicate the move of the Goths towards the Mediterranean. 

one of my so-called slides for my so-called talk

Lois says I've used the "male symbol" to indicate that the Goths went south - but perhaps a lot of them were in fact men. I'm not sure - perhaps we should be told?

some typical Goths - they look like men to me, but who knows 

under all that armour - hard to say!

In any case, men or not, those Goths knew what they were doing: going south and getting a bit of sunshine. Makes sense to me  !!!!

10:00 Lois and I discuss Goths briefly, and then, later, when we  do some tidying up in the garden, we experiment with doing our own "take" on the famous Grant Wood picture, "American Gothic" (1930).

the original "American Gothic" (1930)

the iconic Cosmo Kramer version

our own "take" on the idea: I don't think we've got it quite right -

but it's a start. Call it a work in progress.

13:00 After lunch we go for a walk on the local football field. It's sunny but freezing cold, with a bitter wind - brrrr!!! Summer's over all right, that's for sure. 

We go for a walk on the local football field, but it's bitterly cold - brrrr!!!

- and we more or less have the place to ourselves.

14:00 We go up to bed for a couple of hours' rest. 

I have to put Lois's ear-drops in her left ear, so she lies on her right hand side for me. This is the first time I've done it, and it's going to be a twice-daily job from now on till she has her appointment at the ear clinic.

After I've put the drops in, she then has to lie still till the drops have gone wherever it is they go - it's impossible to see them after they have left the thingummy-jig, which is a pity! We have to just say goodbye to them and hope for the best!

the basics of the job: it's not exactly rocket-science haha!

19:15 After dinner, Lois has a 45 minute gap before she has to go back into the dining-room to take part in her sect's weekly Bible Class, so we watch the first half or so of the women's football quarter-final between Spurs and Arsenal.

We know that our grandchildren in Headley, Hampshire, will be particularly interested in this game. Isaac (11) is a Spurs fan, although he's only really interested in the men's side. Josie (15) and Rosalind (13) are both fans of the Arsenal women.

Lois is rooting for Spurs, just because Arsenal have won the cup so many times - she's always got a soft spot for the underdog: that's basically why she married me haha! And she's rewarded within the first couple of minutes when Spurs score the first goal.

Unfortunately for Lois, Arsenal then fight back and score 5 goals, to win the match. 

Poor Lois!!! But our granddaughters will be pleased, no doubt about that!

Both girls are big Arsenal fans now, although I can remember when they used to support the Chelsea women. How fickle fans are these days!

flashback to January 2020 at the Reading Stadium, to watch 

Chelsea Women play Reading Women: (left to right)

our son-in-law Ed, Josie, Isaac, our daughter Alison, and Rosalind

the Chelsea women celebrate one of their goals: 

rightmost is Chelsea defender Millie Bright

Millie comes over to talk to Rosalind and Josie, which is nice

20:00 Lois disappears into the dining-room to take part in her sect's weekly Bible Class on zoom. I settle down on the couch to watch Episode 6 of the 2nd Season of the Danish crime series "The Killing", which Lois doesn't like. 

I watch this episode through, but, by chance, Lois comes back in to sit on the couch with me for the final 5 minutes, as soon as her zoom session is over. That's a pity for Lois, because in the last 5 minutes of the Episode another 2 gruesome attacks are discovered, which unfortunately Lois has to "witness" - oh dear.

Up till now the victims have all been Danish soldiers mixed up in some alleged atrocity in a remote Afghan village. Tonight these latest 2 victims are:

(1)  the soldiers' chaplain who was stationed with them in Afghanistan (and whose name I still haven't managed to take in) - Inspector Sarah Lund finds the man stabbed and strung up in his church's toilets, and 

(2) the former Danish Justice Minister, Monberg, who's been undergoing hospital treatment (see picture above).

In another of the series's trademark poorly-lit scenes, 

Inspector Sarah Lund finds the ex-Afghanistan army chaplain

stabbed and strung up in his church's toilets.

Denmark's Justice Minister Buch finds his predecessor, Monberg

lying dead in a pool of blood in a hospital basement.

That's politics Danish-style haha!!!

Poor Monberg !!!! 

And poor chaplain, whatever your name is !!!!!!!

Only 4 episodes to go now !!!!!

21:00 We wind down with an old episode of the 1990's sitcom "The Brittas Empire", all about Gordon Brittas, manager of the Whitbury Leisure Centre.

I think it's safe to say that while Gordon Brittas sees himself as a firm but good-natured leisure centre manager, who's above all concerned to see that no rules are broken, he's not popular either with his staff, or with the customers, or, perhaps least of all, with his wife Helen.

In tonight's episode Brittas is away at a "Management Conference" in Bulgaria. However news comes back that he's been crushed by machines in a horrible accident while visiting a car factory. The town of Whitbury then goes into celebratory mode, and suddenly the Leisure Centre is crowded with customers, and Brittas's wife Helen starts making plans for life without Gordon.

Then suddenly Brittas turns up unannounced - his reported "death" was a case of mistaken identity, it seems. This is a pity for his wife, because she's arranged to get married the same day, to a man she picked up 2 days ago at Gordon's supposed "cremation".

Leisure Centre manager Gordon Brittas returns from his 8-day business trip

to Bulgaria to find his wife Helen just about to remarry

Poor Helen !!!!!

flashback to last week's episode: the Brittas family breakfast table.

Gordon just about to go off to work, and Helen getting ready to go and

see a man she calls "my poor bedridden Uncle Simon".

Tremendous fun !!!!!!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!!

Tuesday September 28th 2021

06:00 Lois and I tumble out of bed about 2 hours earlier than normal - my god! The guy from Team-Know-How, who's going to repair our freezer's broken door-handle, could arrive as early as 7 am, if it fits their schedule. What madness!

 a typical Team Knowhow truck - not the one that comes to us:

the driver of this one is probably taking a so-called "comfort stop",

but it's impossible to be sure, I think!

flashback to yesterday's crazy message from 

so-called "Team Knowhow"  - what madness!!!!

[repair reference number redacted for security reasons]

We have bets on when he'll arrive - he actually comes at 9:15 am. He's a nice chap - a Brummie, and it only takes him about 10 minutes, but after he goes we scoot around disinfecting all the things he touched. Still that's the price you pay, isn't it! Anyway we can't fault his credentials for being in Team Knowhow - he certainly "knows how", no doubt about that.

after the Brummie guy is safely gone, I showcase

the new handle, completely disinfected by

the time I take this photo

flashback to the freezer's door-handle in unhappier times -

after Lois broke it off in a show of strength

It's important to have good chemistry with one's repair guys - that's something we know for sure. I recall that a man from Wilmette Ilinois, Brad Osterberg, a 38 year intellectual property lawyer, hit the world's headlines a few years ago after he put on a country music CD in order to establish a good rapport with a man who had come to repair his dishwasher (Source Onion News).

In an attempt to impress his repairer, Jason Delmar (29), whom he had called to fix a broken dishwasher, Osterberg played Merle Haggard's 1968 album, Mama Tried, all the time that Delmar was in his home, he later told journalists.

 "He did not say much, but I think we had a really good connection," said Osterberg, who later added that he always makes sure that he has something by A Tribe Called Quest blaring when his usual pizza delivery guy comes. "I just wanted him to feel comfortable. After all I have a pretty nice place here."

After leaving Osterberg's home, Delmar resumed listening to the audiobook of Thomas Pynchon's Gravity's Rainbow on his repair van's CD player to quote "get that hillbilly shit out of my head" unquote.

10:15 Lois and I feel all out-of-whack because we got up 2 hours early, and we don't feel ourselves. When will it be lunchtime?

I ring Lynda. She's the leader of the local U3A Middle English group. The group is supposed to be holding its monthly meeting on Friday afternoon, and I'm supposed to be the star speaker, talking on zoom about "How The Vikings Changed Our Language", but Lynda hasn't yet sent out her usual emailed invitation to the group's members.

She apologises and promises to put the email out a bit later today, which is a relief.

15:00 I do some work on my so-called presentation. I've decided to do a complete "brain-dump" of everything I know and then email it out to members tomorrow or Thursday. This will be less taxing for my powers of memory, and I can cut bits out "on-the-go", when I give the talk on Friday afternoon, when I see how the time's going, and whether they ask me lots of questions or not.

Makes sense to me!

19:00 Lois disappears into the dining-room to take part in her great-niece Molly's yoga class on zoom, followed by her sect's weekly Bible Seminar. I settle down on the couch to watch the 5th episode of the 2nd season of "The Killing", the Danish crime series, that Lois doesn't like.

I've had to struggle to get this far with "The Killing", because of having to watch it when Lois isn't around - difficult for two retired old codgers to arrange, admittedly, as we tend to live in each other's pockets. I've now seen all 20 episodes of Season 1, and all 10 episodes of Season 3. More recently I've seen 4 out of 10 episodes of Season 2, so I'm within sight of the end - phew! And I'm determined to stay the course.

A Danish army unit in Afghanistan got mixed up in some atrocities - the killing of civilians in a remote village. The authorities have cleared them of guilt, but now that the ex-members of the unit are back in Denmark, somebody is going around murdering them all, one by one. 

Initially suspicion fell on Islamic terrorist groups in Denmark, but by Episode 4 the finger was pointing at a mysterious Danish officer, nicknamed "Perk" who "went crazy over there", according to one of the unit's female soldiers.

flashback to Episode 4: ex-soldier Lisbeth Thomsen (left) tells Inspector Sarah Lund

that a Danish officer nicknamed "Perk" went crazy out in Afghanistan

I've long realised that the normal pattern in this drama series is that suspects are put up one by one, only to be proved innocent, and to make way for some new suspect or other in the following episode. So it's no surprise to me tonight to find out that "Perk" is apparently already dead and buried, so at first sight can't be the mysterious person who's going around murdering all the former members of the unit.

Near the end of the episode we see Inspector Lund and her assistant Ulrik Strange going out to the local churchyard to  try and find where "Perk" was buried.

Tonight, in Episode 5 Inspector Sarah Lund and assistant Ulrik Strange

search a Danish churchyard at night to find out where "Perk" is buried

However, just because police have found Perk's grave, that doesn't necessarily mean he's dead, Inspector Lund thinks. His mother was apparently not allowed to see his body before the burial, which seems suspicious, so Inspector Lund wonders if the coffin is actually empty - yikes!

The saga goes on !!!!

21:00 Lois emerges from her two zoom sessions and we watch last week's edition of Antiques Roadshow: a series in which members of the public bring along their family heirlooms and other treasures to some local stately home to have them valued by experts in the various fields of expertise.

Lois and I are both keen history-buffs, so the stand-out item for us is the compass that Welshman Edgar Evans took to Antarctica when he joined Scott's ill-fated Antarctic expedition, in which all the members of Scott's team, all naval men, sadly died.

In tonight's programme Evans's great nephew brings along the compass that went on the expedition.

The expedition reached the Pole but found that Amundsen's Norwegian expedition had beaten them to it, by about 40 days or so.

the expedition reached the Pole but found that Amundsen's

Norwegian expedition had been there already shortly before.

On the journey back, poor Edgar Evans was the first to die, when he fell down a crevasse. His body was never found. 

Fascinating stuff!!!

And interesting to think that the compass, which was left in one of the expedition's huts on the route back, would have been totally useless near the Pole - the needle would have just been going round and round.

What a crazy planet we live on !!!!!

And as Lois and I watch the programme, we're each feeling the effects of the early start to our day, and we both doze off from time to time. 

Lois [only bottom half visible] dozes as I take this souvenir selfie

Oh dear, we must be getting old, that's for sure! [You don't say! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!