Tuesday September 8th 2026 "Being a rockstar - it isn't all 'beer and skittles' is it, to put it mildly !!!!!"

Yes, Friends, I bet you've always secretly dreamed of becoming a world-famous rockstar, haven't you! Go on admit it - and Yours Truly isn't ready to give up my personal dream of fame and stardom, even though I turned 80 this year, which I know is almost impossible to believe!!!!

And yet, the world of rockstars isn't all 'beer and skittles', is it, to judge from these recent headlines in our local Onion News for East Hampshire, at least !!!

Bit of a 'reality check' aren't they - those shocking headlines! But they bring a self-satisfied, not to say 'smug', grin to the faces of me and my wife Lois today, here in semi-quiet Liphook, Hampshire - no question about that!

me and my wife Lois - a recent picture

And although 'the clock is ticking', and time is running out for mine and Lois's own bid for world stardom, hope is at hand that we'll become grandparents of a world-famous rockstar, which is almost as good, to be fair!

Yes, you probably know what I'm going to say, but I'm going to say it anyway (!). The picture of our dear grandson and budding popstar Isaac (16) is starting to appear on 'Rock School' cover pages, would you believe, as we learn today by chance from a low-key social media posting, which is exciting! 

(left) our grandson Isaac (16) with his boy-girl band grabbing headlines

after a recent gig at Guildford's iconic "The Drummond" pop venue, and (right)

a low-key social-media post today, showing Isaac and fellow band-members

gracing the covers of some big 'Rock School' publications, which is exciting!!!

Yes, a couple of years ago, our Isaac started his own boy-girl rock band, for which he is the acclaimed vocalist, from fellow students at a local school here in Liphook, and you know what they say - "Today, Liphook, tomorrow the world" - and that hoary old cliche looks likely to be 'taken out and dusted' and to be proved true at least once more time, believe it or not!!!

And Lois and I are expecting - nay, planning (!) - to be furnishing our potential villa in the South of France, after Isaac and his group 'break America', and 'break everywhere else' at the same time, potentially, which could come as a very welcome 81st birthday present from Isaac, for Lois and me. So watch this space!!!! 

flashback to June: Isaac (16), with his parents - our daughter Alison and husband Edward -

plus siblings, help us celebrate Lois's 80th birthday at a Thai restaurant in nearby

Petersfield, Hampshire - but on Lois's 81st birthday next year, will we

celebrating with the keys to a villa in the south of France - so watch this space!!!

Certainly the prospect of some day owning a villa in the south of France certainly puts a spring in mine and Lois's step this morning, as we engage in one of our favourite activities - '30 minutes of squelching' on the 'hallowed turf' of local East Hampshire Premier League soccer giants Liphook United, Well, there's nobody else around, so why not just 'go for it', that's what say haha!!!

And we're just wallowing (physically and metaphorically!!!) in the happy puddles of rain - the sight which, during this summer's near-constant heatwaves, we earnestly believed we'd never see again. Real rain, and real puddles - it's so amazing to see (and feel!) all this wetness, after all these months of dryness !!!!

Lois and me on our near-daily walk this morning - "30 minutes of squelching"

on the 'hallowed turf' of local Hampshire Premier League soccer giants Liphook United

Yes, we're so happy today, in the words of the song, to finally get ourselves "absolutely soaking wet"! 

We both love walking in the rain, and as a pair of old 'boomers', we can't help today, from time to time, singing the old Ronettes number where lead singer Ronnie Spector (born Veronica Bennett), sings of how she also loves walking in the rain, and is dreaming about finding a like-minded guy to get soaking wet with her, in the poignant Spector-Mann-Weil lyrics to her 1964 "waxing", "Walking in the Rain": remember that "doozy" ?!!!!

And certainly today, I'm guessing Lois also is feeling very lucky, because her walking-companion today - step forward Yours Truly - is definitely one up on the song's two losers Johnny and Bobby, because I personally 'tick all the boxes' ! I myself am kind of shy, would you believe.... and I'm real good-looking too...., and I also like walking in the rain, so it's "job done", which is lucky!

Only joking by the way haha!!!

[That's for sure! - Ed]

By the way, Lois and I had no problem deciding what to wear for our walk - with raincoats, hats and hoods being the order of the day!

'What to wear' however proves more of a problem for Ashley in tonight's episode of Aussie sitcom "Colin From Accounts", to put it mildly! Ashley has been invited by Gordon, her 'ex', to his birthday party, to be held in that pub-come-'artisan' micro-brewery, the one that Gordon manages with the help of his new "squeeze", Chelsea.

As the evening draws near, Ashley, who still fancies Gordon, her ex, enlists the help of bosom-friend Meggles to decide what to wear if she wants to attract Gordon's attention at the party.

Poor Ashley !!!!!!

With friend Meggles' help, however, Ashley eventually finds something 'hotter' to wear, to catch Gordon's eye, and during the party the couple do get accidentally locked in the pub's freezer, and have time for a snog and a quick 'fumble' before they're rescued by their fellow party-goers.

So!  And as the episode ends, the big question is, "Will Ashley and Gordon get it together again?". 

Tune in next week to find out haha!!

[I don't think I'll bother! - Ed]

Will this do?

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzz!!!!!!

Monday September 7th 2026 "Those crazy Japs, eh!! Always making us see things in a different light!!!"

Yes, Friends, what about those crazy Japs, eh! Always thinking "outside the box" with their fancy chopsticks and all!!! Simple knife and fork too 'conventional' for them, seemingly !!!

And for their latest crazy antics, check out your daily print version of Onion News, and you'll get your proof, if proof be needed!!

What madness, isn't it !!!! 

But these Onion stories at least bring an unhealthy glow to the cheeks of me and my wife Lois this morning, here in lovely, semi-industrial Liphook, Hampshire - no question about that!!!

my wife Lois and me - a recent picture

And we can't resist smiling today, because Josie, the eldest of our 5 grandchildren, turns 20 today, a pivotal moment, which is making Lois and me feel a bit like "a right pair of old codgers", that's for sure! "You know you must be old, when one of your grandchildren hits the big 'two-oh " - that's what Lois and I always say, but with an impish grin on our faces at the same time, so fair do's !!!! 

Here's the proof in black and white - with added new 'technicolour'!!!! - in pictures that Josie's 51-year-old mum, our daughter Alison, sends us later today from their temporary rental home just over the county line, in Churt, Surrey, which is nice!!!

for the eldest of our 5 grandchildren, Josie, it's the "Big Two-Oh" today,

which is making Lois and me feel a bit like a couple of 'old codgers', that's a given!!!!!

And the Japanese connection? 

Well, Josie's parents, our daughter Alison and husband Edward, will be treating young Josie to a Japanese sushi meal tonight at her fave restaurant, the Sticks'n'Sushi by Victoria Railway Station in bustling London, no less, and not for the first time, as these birthday pictures from way back in 2020 attest, when Josie was a mere 14-year-old !!!

flashback to September 2020: (left) Josie celebrating her 14th birthday

at the Sticks'n'Sushi by Victoria Station, London, with, also pictured, 

dad Edward, and siblings Rosalind (12) and Isaac (10) - awwwwwww,

how young they all looked, Edward included !!!!!!

My goodness - it's a busy day for Josie's family, and, by a complete coincidence it's also turning into a typically busy day for Yours Truly and for Lois too, no surprise there! It starts with an early visit by Josie's mum, our daughter Alison, who fills us in on the latest birthday news about Josie, and also picks up one of our mattresses for Josie's brother Isaac, who's currently having disturbed nights on his temporary air-bed, which "keeps deflating", according to reports, would you believe, which is mad!!!!!

Alison and family are currently 'between houses', if you please (!), and "all of a doodah", as they prepare to leave their temporary rental home in Churt, in order to return to their 'proper home', a crumbling Victorian mansion in Headley, as builders finish their 18 months of extensive renovation work on the property. Yes, it's 'all go' for all of us, today, that's for sure!!!

(left) our daughter Alison this morning, when she drops in to see us for a 'catch-up',

and (right) seen outside our house with Lois, loading a mattress into her car-boot

And no sooner has Alison left, with our mattress tucked safely in her car-boot, than, literally 10 minutes later, we have about 30 minutes to grab a scratch snack-lunch and then find ourselves having to drive the 3 miles over to Haslemere to attend, of all things, the first meeting in the new academic year of our friend Joe's local U3A "Intermediate Latin for Old Codgers" group, which is mad too!!!!

the route that, after extensive research (!), Lois and I plan to take this morning

to attend our friend Joe's U3A "Intermediate Latin for Old Codgers" class

What a crazy schedule it is for Joe's fortnightly class - 12:30 to 2:30pm (!!!!!!!!), and especially inconvenient for Lois and me, who are normally either in bed, or thinking about going to bed (!), during those 2 hours (!). 

However, help is at hand, because, as Joe explains during today's meeting, the somewhat eccentric timing for his classes is going to be abandoned after today. The mad timing was originally determined by being the only slot available at the nearby, freezing cold, Haslemere Methodist Church Hall, where all Joe's meetings used to be held in the past.

 

flashback to last winter: a typical meeting of Joe's "Intermediate Latin

for Old Codgers" group, at the freezing-cold Methodist Church Hall

in Haslemere, Surrey - brrrrrrrr!!!!

However, now that widower Joe has elected to hold all future group meetings at his own spacious, comfortably furnished, and heated, retirement flat, it's finally "Liberty Hall" as regards timing, which is a relief! And after a lengthy and, at times acrimonious, debate today (!), we all collectively agree to a more civilised time-slot of 11:30am to 13:30pm for future classes. 

And provisionally, Lois and I plan, on future class-days, to have a mid-morning snack at around 11am before we leave home, and then a quick bite when we get back, which should set us up for the afternoon, which is nice! But your suggestions welcome - postcards only haha!!!!

the scenes this afternoon at our friend Joe's first session of his U3A

"Intermediate Latin for Old Codgers" group for the new academic year,

held at his comfortable retirement flat in Haslemere, Surrey: a lengthy

and, at times acrimonious, debate on future class timings, followed

by a little bit of time to read a bit of Sallust and Virgil, which is nice!

Yes, in short, another crazy day!!!!

20:00 And the madness continues this evening, when Lois and I finally find space for a bit of "us time" on the sofa, watching one of our favourite TV quizzes, Only Connect, which tests lateral thinking.

And here's a real "doozy" for you from tonight's show! Can YOU spot the link between these 4 seemingly unrelated "things" ???

I think you've got this one already, haven't you? Thought so !!!! Yes, they're all descriptions of the so-called "mullet" hairstyle, and contestant Louise McMillan (see picture above), who also speaks Swedish, would you believe, gets the answer after only two clues, which is super-fast!

Presenter Victoria Coren-Mitchell accepts this answer, although quibbling about the term 'euphemism', which suggests that the much derided 'mullet' hair-style is something obscene or otherwise 'unacceptable in polite society', which Victoria denies, saying, "We love mullets on this show" (!), so that's all good!

"Kentucky Waterfall", it seems, is just an early term for the mullet hair style, and Bundesligahar stems from a Swedish footballer who sported the style, popularising it in Europe. And the band "Super Furry Animals" apparently had a single by the name "Ice Hockey Hair". 

[??? - Ed]

Presenter Victoria, however, has never heard of the fourth description of the style as: "Business At The Front, Party At The Back".

Oh dear!!!!

There's a happier ending to the show, however, when, by tradition, Victoria reads out her "letter of the week" from one of the show's thousands of dedicated viewers, which is always fascinating!

Oh dear (again) !!!!!

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!!

Sunday September 6th 2026 - "Those 'Frenchies', eh! Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em !!!!"

Yes, Friends, those Frenchies', eh, our close neighbours to the south, if you ignore the English Channel, as many do!!!

Certainly you can't keep the French out of the news - that's one thing that's a 'given'! Take this morning's Onion News - I rest my case!!!!!

And all today's big 'Frenchie' stories bring a welcome, if somewhat wan (!), smile to the faces of me and my wife Lois, as we sit in a little village hall just north of semi-exotic Petersfield, Hampshire, waiting for Lois's church's Sunday Morning Meeting to begin, no question about that!!!!

To our surprise, a elderly man called Bob approaches me and starts talking in French, would you believe! I assume he's having some kind of a stroke, or a seizure maybe, but it turns out that in an earlier existence he lived in France for 12 years (French: douze ans), and that he's anxious to talk to me, because he's heard that I "speak several languages" (!), which I do. But what madness!!!

(left) the little village hall just outside Petersfield, Hampshire, where Lois's

church holds its Sunday Morning Meetings, and (right) Lois and me

in the back row, just before being approached by a man called 'Bob' 

speaking French   - what madness, isn't it!!!!

Speaking personally, I'm not a member of Lois's church in Petersfield, but I can attest that they're a lovely bunch of people, although, if I have a criticism, it's that the church has, over the years, attracted far too many men called 'Bob'. It's got to the stage when, if I'm talking to a man there and can't quite remember his name, I call him 'Bob' to be on the safe side, and I'm usually right, so that's quite a useful pointer!!! 

Certainly the "Bobs to the square foot" indicator (BTTSF) is starting to raise alarms locally. The 'stats' don't lie haha!!!!

flashback to December: Lois's church's Christmas lunch at a pub in Emsworth,

where the number of "Bobs to the square foot" was reportedly at its height,

threatening to reach potentially dangerous levels (!)

It's time for the church to 'reach out' to more of the "non-Bobs" in our community, that's what I say! Sadly, however, I don't have time for a really long Frenchified 'natter' (French: une longue conversation) with this particular 'Bob' after the meeting, because Lois and I have to "dash off" - yet again!!! And no surprise there, because, in the little nearby town of Liphook, Hampshire where we live, neighbours have dubbed Lois and me 'possibly Liphook's busiest-looking retired couple', so fair enough!!!

First on mine and Lois's agenda this lunchtime, is to stop by our daughter Alison and husband Edward's temporary home in Churt, just over the county line in Surrey, to drop off a birthday gift to Alison, their eldest offspring, who's turning 20 tomorrow, would you believe! We've bought young Josie one of those mugs that stay hot all day (a bit like Yours Truly in last month's heatwaves!!!!. It's a mug of the type young people use today - what madness, isn't it!!!

And as Lois and I always say, you know you must be old when your eldest grandchild is no longer a teenager - that's for sure!!!! But what madness (again) !!!! Poor Alison is having a busy time herself today, as the family prepares to leave its temporary rental home in a week's time, and move back into their real home - a crumbling Victorian mansion, which has been under extensive renovation. Let's hope that at least all that scaffolding has come down, by the time they eventually move back in !!!!!

(left) my wife Lois with our daughter Alison today, when we drop off our granddaughter

Josie's 20th birthday present - Alison is busy today preparing for the family's departure

from their temporary rental home, and (right) the family's real home - crumbling Victorian

mansion in Headley, which has recently been under extensive renovation

But for Lois and me, there's no time to stay and chat with Alison, because we have to hurry home to Liphook for a 'quickie' lunch, followed by our weekly 'catch-up' video call with our other daughter, Sarah, who lives in Perth, Australia with husband Francis and their 13-year-old twins, Lily and Jessica. 

Busy busy busy!!!!

us this Sunday lunchtime talking on Lois's phone to our daughter Sarah,

and 13-year-old twins Jessica (centre) and Lily (right), 9000 miles away

in the suburb of Yanchep, just north of Perth, Western Australia - sob sob !!!!!

Lois and I have been particularly looking forward to this chat, to hear about the twins' intrepid 'camping trip' in the outback this last week with their new classmates from their private Anglican grammar school.

We're hoping that the trip will give our twin grandchildren the opportunity to really 'bond' with their new classmates for the first time. Sarah and Francis moved the twins to this school last year, but the two girls have had trouble 'connecting' with their classmates, who had already formed all their friendships over preceding years. 

I know exactly how they must have felt, because I myself had a childhood disrupted by frequent changes of school, and I know how difficult it can be to be accepted and to form friendships when you arrive as a complete outsider. Kids can be extremely 'cliquey', which is a pity!

(above) our brave twin granddaughters Lily and Jessica, arriving at 

their new school for the spring camping trip to the outback, hoping to finally

'bond' with all their new classmates, and (below) the Avon River Region,

80 miles due east of their home in the northern Perth suburb of Yanchep

And the news from the twins is really good, I'm pleased to say, and you could tell it in their voices, so confident and positive today, after a really fun week finally bonding with their new classmates and doing kayaking, zip wires and all that kind of 'malarkey', which is so nice for Lois and me to hear, you would not believe!

So, another busy day at the Colin-and-Lois house, that's what our neighbours are saying!

However, Lois and I have another side to us, that we're not hiding from our neighbours either! It's our 'cosmopolitan' side, where we often regale them with tales of our 3 years in the States in the early 1980's, would you believe!

flashback to 1984: Lois and me, with our two daughters Alison (9) and Sarah (7)

touring the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia, and (right) me, cool as a cucumber,

driving our All-American car, with the steering wheel on the 'wrong' side (!)

And today we're spreading the word that we'll be glued to our TV set tonight, watching the planned documentary on Sky Documentaries about Canadian Lorne Michaels, who started America's biggest TV comedy show, way back in 1975.

And the comedy show in question is, of course, the famously controversial satirical weekly sketch show "Saturday Night Live", and tonight's documentary, we tell neighbours, looks set to be a real humdinger, and we plead with them, please, not to disturb us tonight with any footling phone-calls, no matter what the "emergency", which takes them aback, to put it mildly!!!

For Lois and me, Lorne surprisingly turns out to be "our kind of a guy", slightly introverted, quiet and doesn't like to chat for too long, a creature of habit, who always eats out everty night at the same New York restaurant, and always orders the same dish - what's-not to-like about a guy like that haha!!!

Lorne Michaels, Candadian-born producer of satirical sketch show

"Saturday Night Live" 'always eats at the same New York

restaurant, and always order the same thing  -

what's not to like about a guy like that haha!!!!

He's the show's producer, and he just quietly "does his job", because, although quiet, he knows what's funny and what isn't, which is his unique selling point, and it's made him the great survivor at an NBC network often uncomfortable with his show. Over the years numerous writers and cast-members have been fired by the network, but Lorne has kept his job, decade after decade, which is heart-warming!

He started all his early shows with a long-running gag "Bee Hospital", a maternity hospital, even though network executives ordered him to kill it because it just wasn't funny, they claimed.

Oh dear, so not a worker then !!!! Lorne, however, was determined to pursue the idea despite network opposition.

And he brought the bees back for the second show, a happier occasion when the baby turned out to be a 'worker', to Mr Bee's delight, followed by the third show where we see network executives telling the bees among the show's cast that they had to collect their things and move out. And then a fourth show where we see the bees receiving a reprieve, which was heart-warming, and the rest is history!

A simple note from the NBC hierarchy said it all - "More bees, please!"

So "Kudos, Lorne,  and hail to thee! You kept us out of war!" haha !!!!

Will this do?

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!