Friday June 5tth 2026 "Us 'old people' are getting younger all the time! Have YOU noticed!!!"

 Yes, Friends, take a look at YOUR elderly friends and relatives! Aren't they marvellous! And doing the most astonishing things! Just look at today's Onion News, and try NOT to look at the somewhat churlish comments from the paper's lightning survey of readers' views at the same time!!!

Meeowwwww!!!! Just jealous aren't they!!!! And reading the Onion News story this morning, here in semi-transparent Liphook, Hampshire, brings a delighted smile to the faces of me and my wife Lois, no question about that!!!!

me and my wife Lois - a recent picture

Why are we laughing? Well, the clue is in the story's 'dateline' - June 5th 2026 - which is exactly 80 years after Lois "popped" triumphantly into this world in the the maternity wing of the Radcliffe Hospital, Oxford!

Yes, she's 80 years young today, which is something to celebrate, to put it mildly!

Tonight, we've been invited, by our daughter Alison and family to a celebratory oriental meal at the Miso Asia restaurant in nearby Petersfield, but before then Lois has chosen to look round the Rural Life Centre at nearby Tilford this morning, so it's going to be busy busy busy!!! But that's what life is like these days for us 'active seniors', so get used to it, before YOU get to 80, that's my advice!!!!

At Tilford, a special treat for Lois will be to look over an ancient relic, and I'm not talking about me, here haha!!! Lois spent the first 8 years or so of her life living in one of those post-war "prefabs", designed to solve the housing crisis that faced bombed-out Britain in the years following 1945. 

some early pictures of Lois around 1950 or thereabouts: (left) on the swing

outside her family's pre-fab, and (right) ringed, 'chewing the fat' and generally

'putting the post-WW2 world to rights', with some of her little friends - awwwwww!!!!

Lois has got such a good memory, compared to me, and she still vividly remembers the floor-plan of her parents' prefab in north Oxford, and it's with a faraway look in her eye that, with me following closely behind, she sees this 'restored' one at Tilford this morning, kitted out with furniture and appliances from the time, that's for sure!

Lois and I this morning at the Tilford Rural Life Centre, looking at restored 'prefab'

(prefabricated house) of the kind developed to solve the post-WW2 housing crisis

Other stuff at the centre commemorates the stationing in this area of our brave Canadian allies, who came to the aid of the 'mother country' in 1914 and again in 1939. It also commemorates the housing here of the brave Polish servicemen and also of the brave Polish families of refugees, who fled their homeland, either escaping the Nazis before 1945, or the Communists, after 1945.

an exhibit commemorating the Tweedsmuir Camp, where Polish 

refugee families fleeing communism were housed after 1945 -

a photo of one of these families is displayed in this window

Earlier, during World War II, after Poland was invaded and occupied by the Nazis, the Polish armed forces chose to continue the fight from Britain, and the exhibit commemorates their presence, also, in this area.

The exhibition makes a valiant attempt to illustrate graphically the activities of the Polish Armed Forces on the Allied side during the war, but it confuses Lois and me no end, even though we're both self-confessed 'history buffs' (!). But see if you can understand it!

It baffles us, we have to confess !!!!!

The happy result of the Polish refugees and servicemen settling in this area after the war, and after all the painful experiences that they had to go through, was that many young Polish children grew up here, and were educated at local schools. Many of their children and grandchildren are still around living in this part of Surrey today.

Fascinating stuff !

After strolling around the exhibition, and having a look at the quaint old signs and the amusing models of 19th to 20th century sheep etc (!), Lois and I have a celebratory birthday lunch at the centre's cafe and then go home for a well-earned celebratory afternoon in bed for 'celebratory nap-time', which is nice!

17:00 We struggle out of bed, because we're going to be picked up at 6pm by our son-in-law Edward, and whisked off to nearby Petersfield, where Edward is treating us to an oriental birthday meal, with our daughter Alison, and two of their 3 teenage kids, Rosalind (17) and Isaac (15) - Josie (19) being away up north on her first-year maths degree course at Durham University.

The restaurant on this Friday evening is absolutely 'rammed' as young people say today, and we think the waiter's astonishment to learn that Lois is as old as 80 is perfectly genuine - his best guess is "seventy maybe?" , the one that's the nearest to the mark, which is a nice touch!

20:30 Then, as a final surprise, when Alison drops Lois and me off at our home in Liphook, there's a bunch of flowers waiting for us on the doorstep, courtesy of our daughter Sarah, who lives in Perth, Australia with husband Francis and their 12-year-old twins Lily and Jessica. This is in addition to the set of 'scents' and 'smellies' that Lois received from Sarah by Royal Mail earlier today.

a nice bunch of flowers, sent by our other daughter Sarah,

which is waiting for us on our doorstep when we arrive home tonight

By coincidence, Sarah and Francis are also celebrating today, because it's their wedding anniversary, and the whole family went for dinner tonight in Perth's skyscraper revolving restaurant, the restaurant where, back in 2016, by another coincidence, Lois and I celebrated Lois's 70th birthday.

You do the maths haha!!!!

Will this do?

[Yes, yes, you can go to bed now! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzz!!!!!

Thursday June 4th 2026 "Do YOU know someone who's doing something weird today?"

Yes, Friends, do YOU know somebody, maybe a special friend or close relative, who's busy doing something weird today that you don't really understand the purpose of?

It happens from time to time, doesn't it, and there's a real "doozy" of an example on the front page of today's Onion News, to put it mildly!!!!

Poor Winfield!!!! This purely local guy, who just happens to live just across the street from Yours Truly, has a busy enough life already, without all that 'lawn-work' malarkey, if we're to believe our neighbours!

The story, however, brings a welcome, if vapid, smile to the faces of me and my wife Lois this morning, here in leafy Liphook, Hampshire, as we take our near-daily walk, which today takes us over the soggy, windswept "hallowed turf" of local soccer heroes Liphook United, where we dodge the worst of the rain for a quick 'canoodle' (!) in team coach Matthew Grindle (59)'s so-called "management dug-out", no question about that!

Lois and me this morning, taking our near-daily walk, which takes us over

the rain and wind-affected 'hallowed turf' of local soccer heroes, Liphook United

And Winfield's purely local story is soon picked up by 'the nationals' - the Times and Telegraph etc, and, on an admittedly 'slow news' day, dominates the early morning headlines on the BBC's World Service, so kudos, that man - putting Liphook, and East Hampshire too, 'on the map', where it surely belongs, if there's any justice in the world, that's for sure!

[Stop 'wittering', Colin! - Ed]

Like area man Winfield, Lois and I, too, got up early today to make a start on our incredibly packed schedule on this, Lois's last day as a septuagenarian, if you can believe that!

Yes, unbelievably, Lois will be turning 80 tomorrow - you do the maths !!!!!

some early pictures of Lois in the late 1940's or thereabouts: (left) on the swing

outside her family's pre-fab, and (right) ringed, 'chewing the fat' and generally

'putting the post-WW2 world to rights', with some of her little friends - awwwwww!!!!

And as part of our preparation for 'the big day' tomorrow, as well as our near-daily walk (see above for the sordid details!), we somehow find time today to (1) go to Lois's local hair-stylist Anna's "Haircraft" salon for her pre-birthday "trim", (2) shoot over to nearby Haslemere to pick up some CookShop ready-meals for Saturday's "big tea", (3) get home in time for a delivery of the celebration groceries, and finally (4), pop round to our local dentist's surgery for Lois's second session with dental hygienist Lisa, who wants to perfect Lois's "birthday smile".

(above) Lois's session with her stylist Anna, (centre) for a pre-birthday "trim",

(centre) getting the 'celebration groceries' etc from Cook Shop in Haslemere and

a home-delivery from Ocado supermarket, and (below) our local dental surgery

for Lois's session with hygienist Lisa (left) and dental nurse Aryana

Busy busy busy!!! 

And the burning question is, once more, "How did we ever find time to go to work, back in the day?" !!!!!!!

The worst thing is that our afternoon in bed, for "statutory nap-time" is reduced, today, to a slender two hours, which is a pity, but that's the reality of life for busy pensioners in today's Britain, that's for sure!!!!!

At least pensioners get a more varied life than the UK's incredible stag-beetles, which is a comfort (!), as we learn from tonight's edition of Springwatch, the series which takes a seasonal look at the state of nature and wildlife in the UK, with the help of a team of presenters, led by Chris Packham and Michaela Strachan.

Stag beetles, we learn, are mainly confined to southern and south-eastern areas of the UK. They grow to an impressive 3 inches (7.5cm) in length, but they have to spend almost all of their lives in rotten wood, which must be annoying, to put it mildly!

one of tonight's "programme props" showcasing the 

life cycle of an average British stag beetle

Stag beetles spend years underground as larvae just 'poncing about', and then, when, as pupae, they finally hatch out, they only get to live in the real world for such a little time - a few weeks to a couple of months. And, to make it worse, their mandibles are, by now, so huge that they can't eat any more, so they have to live off any energy  they've managed to store before they hatch out. 

Poor stag beetles!!!!

So a life with no eating, then! Perhaps just as well, as eating would be a distraction, because the stag beetle's main job in his short life is now just to mate with a beetle of the opposite sex, and then die happy, if a bit hungry, so fair enough!

stag beetles mating - JD! (job done!!!)

For Welsh naturalist Iolo Williams, however, it's a dream come true, on tonight's programme, to see his first ever stag beetle - they aren't common outside the south and south-east of England.

And the normally talkative Iolo is almost reduced to silence by the sight of this three-inch 'monster', which is touching!

Awwww!!!!! Poor Iolo !!!!!! 

Still, they're together at last, Iolo plus his first-ever stag-beetle, and that's the main thing!

But what a crazy planet we live on !!!!!

Will this do?

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzz!!!!!!

Wednesday June 3rd 2026 "Dentists and their new 'high-tech' methods- it's a lethal mixture, isn't it!"

Yes, Friends, I don't know if you've visited YOUR dentist recently? 

No? I thought so! Easier to 'put it off', isn't it, because you never know what they're going to discover next - like this local dentist in today's local Onion News - see my 'potted version' right here, for your convenience!

Kudos, that dentist!!!!

And reading that story this morning, here in semi-detached Liphook, Hampshire, brings a anxious look of fear to the faces of me and my wife Lois - no question about that!!!!

me and my wife Lois - a recent picture

And our look of semi-amused terror at today's news is because, by complete coincidence, today is the much-feared day of our 6 monthly check-up at the premises of our Portuguese 'Kiwi' dentist, Jose, and his hygienist Lisa. We're right to be looking terrified, because it turns out that I've got to have a filling right in the hard-to-reach back of my mouth, and Lois has to go back for another session with Lisa tomorrow about some supposed 'gum issue', would you believe! 

What madness modern dentistry is, isn't it!

Of course the real terror will be when we get to pick up their bill, and this time, I'm going to demand a pain-killing injection before they tell me the amount, to ease some of the torment haha!!!!! 

(above) our local dental surgery, with our Portuguese 'kiwi' dentist, Jose, and his

hygienist Lisa, and (below me in the waiting room while Lois is being 'done'

- what a madness it all is, isn't it!!!!

There's no real way of enjoying a session at the dentist, is there, and there has been a feeling of ill-disguised tension in our house for the previous 30 minutes, before we take our courage in both hands, and venture into Liphook's tiny town centre to take our seats in the waiting-room - no disguising that!

To try and lighten the mood, we've been wearing our old "[Brian] Lemming of the BDA" (British Dental Association) tee-shirts in bed for a couple of nights.

It's kind of like a reminder of those times when Lois and I were younger, and the dental trade was run by 'The Mob', and you never knew whether you'd get shot or kidnapped during your 'check-up' (!). Remember some of those terrifying TV series, like "The Unbiteables", that we all used to watch, as teenagers, back in the 1970's, starring Eric Idle as Lemming?

Happy days!!!!!

Jose, our dentist, and Lisa, Jose's hygienist, have noticed that Lois and I are both 'a bit long in the tooth' [no pun intended!!!!], and the two of them, with their usual sensitivity [again, no pun intended!!!] avoid too many references to some of our fillings 'having been there for a long time', which is a nice touch!

At least tonight, Lois and I will be able to dispense with the tee-shirts, and, instead, be dazzled by each other's smiles, thanks to hygienist Lisa's work with her so-called "polisher", which will be a pleasant change !!!

flashback to June 2025, and our last visit to see Jose and Lisa, when we were

looking a lot more youthful - a year younger in fact: you do the maths haha!!!

Yes, Lois and I may be a couple of old 'codgers' (!) - "guilty as charged" haha (!!), but there's another old couple even older, in Northern Ireland, as we discover when we settle down on the couch, and catch up with last night's programme in this year's Springwatch series, which takes a look at the state of nature and wildlife in the UK.

And who knew that, just like people, trees can be male or female (but with no "non-binaries" as far as we know haha!!!), and that 'tree couples' with the male somehow managing to 'pollinate' the female even after hundreds or even thousands of years of 'marriage'? It's total madness, like everything in nature, but a shot in the arm for Lois and me, who've only been married for a mere 54 years, and a definite encouragement to "keep at it" (!!!!).

Presenters Chris Packham and Michaela Strachan found this dear old 'Darby and Joan' of the tree world, a delightful pair of yews, on the Crom Estate in Northern Ireland. Awwwwww!!!!

Awwww!!! Sweet!!!!!!

As an interesting detail [???? - Ed], Lois and I have never measured our circumference when we're together, but I suspect it's less than that of that yew-tree couple and their so-called '150 metres', especially after our latest attempt at dieting (!!!!).

This dear old pair of trees are thought to be between 400 and a thousand years old, Michaela tells us. The trees were definitely there, and pollinating, when the nearby Crom Castle was built back in 1617, but they could be a lot older than that, naturalists believe. 

the ruins of the 17th century Crom Castle, in County Fermanagh, Northern Ireland

These two trees on the Crom Estate are the oldest trees in Northern Ireland, but not the oldest in the UK, an honour which goes to the Fortingall yew tree in a churchyard in Perthshire, Scotland, a tree that is believed to be between three and seven thousand years old, and may be the oldest tree in the whole of Europe, probably germinating in the Stone Age, as Michaela points out.

What madness, isn't it !!!

the Fortingall yew tree in a churchyard in Perthshire, Scotland,

possibly Europe's oldest tree, at 3000 - 7000 years old

Presenter Chris says there are a couple of trees near his home in Hampshire, England, which are 2000 years old, and he goes there sometimes to sit under them, to be 'calmed' and 'just to be humbled by them' and put in his place, he says. After all, we're all just tiny blips in the life of these organisms.

It's an activity that Lois and I had never heard of. It's called 'forest bathing', for which you go, on your own, or with your 'squeeze', and sit under some incredibly old tree and just contemplate, in an atmosphere of total calm. Michaela and Chris decide to try it out.

Michaela, however, confesses that she normally does her 'forest bathing' with a twist, which shocks the strait-laced Chris. "You're supposed to do it absolutely naked!", she claims, although she promises she isn't going to 'strip off' during tonight's show, which is a relief!

Oops! TMI, Michaela - too much information!!!

And as Chris comments, "If you go down in the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise, I can tell you! Strachan naked!!!"

Oh dear!

But this segment of the programme tonight is a bit of a worry to Lois and me, because we often take our near-daily walk in nearby tree-covered Radford Park. So far we haven't been confronted by any 'lesser spotted naked forest-bathers' (!), but it may only be a matter of time if Michaela's so-called 'fad' catches on, and becomes the 'new normal', to put it mildly!!

us on one of our near-daily walks through nearby Radford Park,

notable for its absence (so far!) of naked 'tree bathers' (!!!!)

But what a crazy world we live in !!!!!

Will this do?

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!