Wednesday February 28th 2024

Everybody has a busy schedule these days, don't they. Have you noticed? How can we possibly stay fully connected with spouses, partners, friends and family? 

It's not easy, is it!

Yes, everybody, it seems, has got too much to do! And the newspaper headlines speak volumes, don't they. These stories, stuck in my personal scrapbook, were taken from just one week's stories from "The Onion", the influential American news website, hard though it is to believe!

Yes, Putin, having to move forward his rigged re-election, the anxieties of balancing anxieties, CEOs with no time for their marital duties, housekeepers too busy to make the sort of "sassy" comments  that Alice (played by Ann B. Davis) used to make in TV's "The Brady Bunch", and, finally, peasants too busy to unwind by having a few minutes to gawp at the occasional execution: what's become of our world?

flashback to the early 1970's: housekeeper Alice (centre, played by Ann B. Davis)

making a sassy comment to busy mother Mrs Carol Brady (right,

played by Florence Henderson) in an episode of TV's "The Brady Bunch"

Overall, however, I think the tragick-est story [???- Ed] in that sorry week's collection from The Onion is probably the one about the overworked American CEO and his wife, don't you think? But at least the couple seem to have found a solution, which is heart-warming.

GROSSE POINTE, MI—As part of the ongoing trend toward replacing U.S. workers with foreign labour, the marital duties of United Carborundum CEO Howard Reinhardt have been outsourced to his Mexican groundskeeper, industry sources revealed Monday.

"It was time for a change," said Reinhardt's wife Melanie, who has been married to the CEO for 17 years and has conducted her sexual business almost exclusively with him since 1984. "While I was generally satisfied with the level of servicing that I received under Howard, it was my feeling that a younger, more aggressive hand on the tiller might bring some new ideas into play. No matter how mutually satisfying the old deal was, its time had passed."

Although specific terms of the arrangement have not been made public, Melanie admitted that she has been "very pleased" by the new supplier—Jorge Escobedo, a 26-year-old gardener from Sierra Mojada who has been working in the U.S. since last month.

26-year-old Mexican gardener Jorge Escobedo,

who's been working in the US for over a month

"The switchover was seamless, considering how rapidly the deal was closed," said Melanie, who initiated the informal arrangement with Escobedo this week on February 20th, while he was cleaning the equipment shed. "Well, in truth, I was considering a move in this direction for some time, and looking into possibilities. Then Jorge offered me a very attractive package, and I decided it was in my interest to act. I've been very pleased with his initial performance....

"This isn't some sort of challenge to the American workforce as a whole," Melanie said. "I'm just sending the jobs where they're going to be done most efficiently. The acquisition of houses, automobiles, and clothing will all still be in Howard's wheelhouse, but groundskeeping and ploughing are now to be managed by Jorge. It just makes sense."

a typical busy board meeting at United Carborundum

Melanie said the outsourcing is a direct response to the expansion of husband Howard Reinhardt's duties at United Carborundum.

"Howard is simply too busy to personally keep track of every detail of the marital union," Melanie said. "As long as he's available when he's needed—major Reinhardt-family gatherings and the United Carborundum holiday ball—I'm happy to have someone else's input day-to-day." [source: Onion News]

We're happy for the Reinhardts of course, while at the same time acknowledging that the average family just hasn't got the resources to implement such a quick and neat, but potentially expensive, solution to their problem.

But that's one for the politicians, really, isn't it! Rishi Sunak and Keir Starmer, please take note!

Keir Starmer, leader of Her Majesty's Opposition (left)

sharing a joke with Rishi Sunak, UK Prime Minister

Enough said, I believe! Let's leave that one there. 

But to think that among all these busy people featuring in these headlines, there isn't a single one that has even retired yet! Everybody knows how, once you're retired, you quickly become busier than ever, don't you, like - a billion times busier, maybe more! 

If YOU are retired, you'll know exactly what I mean, I think!!!!

Yes, Lois and I have been retired for almost exactly 18 years - we retired when I reached the age of 60, back in 2006. And just look at our schedule for today - a cool half a dozen or so tasks we've somehow got to fit in  !!!

Some day this is going to be, by the looks of it. Talk about busy busy busy!!!

08:00 We go through the day's agenda in bed, as usual, and at this stage it seems just horrendous, a total nightmare, but we decide that there's only one thing to do: get on with the initial tasks, at least, as soon as we're able to get down to them, and hope that the rest of the day will somehow "sort itself out". 

But what a madness it all is !!!!!

10:00 We "plunge straight into" our tasks with a visit to the Poolbrook Kitchen and Coffee Shop. We find that it's packed even 10 minutes after opening, with its usual two groups of customers in an uneasy "standoff" - the local old codgers on the left, and the busy young mums with their enormous baby buggies on the right.

the scene this morning in the local coffee shop: behind us 

some of the local "old codgers" on the left hand side of the shop..

...and on the right some of the local young mums, blocking

any available free space with their enormous baby-buggies

I must say that, although they're often described as "warring groups" in the local press, to mine and Lois's knowledge there's never been any "trouble" between the 2 factions that we've seen, but if there ever is, my money's on the old codgers, being more numerous - although of course there is always the risk of being mown down by a young mum with an enormous baby buggy in a hit-and-run so-called "accident". 

But let's put that thought out of our minds for now, and enjoy our americanos and cake, shall we!

a slice of lemon something cake for Lois

and a coffee-and-walnut for me - yum yum!

an oasis of calm in another frantic day - what madness !!!

Andrew, the owner, is busy in the back-room this morning, so he's dragged his poor old mum out to serve customers. Andrew is a local St Andrews Parish Church stalwart, and his jaunty "God With Us" signs are in plentiful evidence around the shop as usual, which is nice! 

Andrew has been the owner since April 2023, after buying the shop from its "burnt out" former owner, Alison Pearson - remember?

So, even more "busy people" then ?????

What a crazy world it is that we all live in !!! 

21:00 Our busy day over, Lois and I manage to unwind on the couch with the second programme in stand-up comedian Bill Bailey's new series "Perfect Pub Walks". His guest and fellow-walker tonight is respected retired TV journalist Sir Trevor McDonald.

Call me a shallow idiot if you like, but to me this evening, it's the pubs that are far more interesting than the walks and the talks that Bill Bailey has with this week's guest, veteran ITN news-reader and journalist Sir Trevor McDonald.

Trinidad-born Sir Trevor certainly  has a lot of achievements to be proud of in his long career in journalism: he's broken down a lot of barriers - he was the first ever black journalist to be given a job on British television, at ITN in 1973, and he's become an icon and an inspiration for thousands of black youngsters ever since.

He was among  the first Western journalists to interview both Saddam Hussein and Colonel Gadhafi, as well as the first to interview Nelson Mandela after his release from prison in South Africa.

Sir Trevor McDonald interviewing Nelson Mandela

on his release from prison in South Africa

The downside to this programme is that Sir Trevor doesn't open up much about himself and his personal life - which is his prerogative, but it makes it slightly less absorbing to watch than last week's edition with stand-up comedian Alan Davies.

As Bailey himself admits, this is an inevitable casualty of Sir Trevor having had half of lifetime of being a detached news-reader for ITN:

On the other hand, the pubs the two men visit on their walk in tonight's programme are just great, however. My goodness, yes! Fascinating!

I'm talking especially about the 16th century pub, The Bull at Brantham, which has oak beams from wrecked ships of the Spanish Armada and Philip of Spain's failed invasion attempt of 1588, as the pub landlord explains to Bill and Sir Trevor. 

And the pub was also once the town courthouse, where Matt Hopkins, the notorious Witchfinder-General, used to drag poor innocent women, and where he held his so-called "hearings", back in the 1640's, hanging his victims just outside the pub, on the village green.

What a mad world they lived in, in those far-off crazy 17th century days!

[Look, Colin, you're obviously 'overwrought', and tired and emotional after your so-called 'busy' day. Why don't you and Lois just go to bed" - Ed]

[Pleeaaaasse, can't we have another 10 minutes???!!!! - Colin and Lois]

[No, absolutely not! Remember you've got another day just as "busy" tomorrow! - Ed]

[No fair !!!! - Colin and Lois]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzz!!!!

Tuesday February 27th 2024

Bad photos can say so much, can't they - have you ever noticed? Unposed, with people looking a bit vague perhaps: they really bring the past to life, don't they!

And you'll be clear that by "bad photos" or "indifferent photos", I don't just mean photos with obvious mistakes in them like this "doozy", featuring two kids with their apparently "headless" mum:

a headless mum with her 2 children

It's photos like the following one that I'm thinking about, photos of me, 2 or 3 years old or thereabouts, attending a birthday party for one of my "little friends" with a bunch of kids the same sort of age, all sitting blankly round a table piled with jam sandwiches and a big birthday cake, with none of us really aware of the occasion and with not much thought about interacting with each other.

That's real life isn't it!

this dark and blurry photo is the only record I have of a long-forgotten 

birthday party for my "friend" Derek, which I attended when I was about 

2 or 3 years old. I'm sitting second from left, and trying

to look interested - oh dear! 

Yes,.that's what I like to see - lots of blurred heads, and nobody looking at the camera!

Or it's photos like this of my mother (foreground, left) approaching old age, sitting with two of her sisters and a sister-in-law, and she's looking distinctly detached, sleepy even. That's a bit of reality for you - no posing, no big smiles for the camera, just a slice of everyday life, with its portions of humdrum as well as its portions of excitement.

my mother (bottom left) spending an afternoon with 

her sister-in-law Elsie, and 2 of her sisters, Betty and Babs

I think we've all experienced afternoons like that, haven't we. Come on, admit it!

"But why is Colin telling us all this?", I hear you cry.

Well, it's because it's February 27th - it's the day every year on which my sister Jill and I remember our dear late, much-missed sister Kathy, who died on this day in 2013, so 11 years ago now. It's something we both share each year with Kathy's husband, our American brother-in-law Steve, who still lives in the house in Norristown, Pennsylvania where Kathy died on that sad day in 2013.

Each year on this day, I pick out some pictures of Kathy to put on my blog in her memory. Normally I would pick out some of the many dazzling, glamorous pictures I have of her, like this amazing one, and it's "just" a passport photo:

This year, however, I've chosen some indifferent ones, because in a certain kind of way they're more "real". And as a heads up, Kathy's quite a bit younger in them - these pictures have been hanging around in the "not good enough to put in an album" album for over 70 years. You know the album I mean, don't you!

Let me take you back exactly 75 years, to February 1949, the month when wartime clothing rationing finally ended in Britain, and women could think about buying nylons again. 

flashback to 1942: women having "stockings" painted 

on their legs for 3d (3 old pence), to avoid using up their clothing coupons

The photos below that I've selected must have been taken by my mother. They date from exactly 75 years ago this month, and they were taken in our house in Dover maybe on some dull, cold grey afternoon, when, still young and inexperienced as a mum, our mother was alone in the house with her two lively little ones - me (nearly 3) and Kathy (15 months) - on the family sofa, possibly watching our tiny 9 inch screen TV set,  "boosted" by its optional add-on 3 inch magnifier-screen. 

She must have decided to get out her old box camera, and she took several pictures, maybe a whole film's worth. 

Unfortunately neither I nor Kathy were willing to keep still long enough for her to take some really good ones. But again she's "caught us" in a slice of real life, hasn't she. Here are some of them:

Oops, Kathy's moving, waving her arm about this way and that!

oops - there's me moving about and looking all blurry

but very pleased with myself: were we watching

our primitive old TV with its tiny 9 inch screen, I wonder?

(top photo) me fiddling with a toy and Kathy fascinated by her hands

and (bottom photo) me moving half out of shot and Kathy now fascinated by her dress

Did we not notice that mummy had a camera in her hands? Did we have no sense of occasion? What a madness it all was! And of course in those days you didn't know that a photo was a failure until you had taken the film to the chemists and got the prints back, maybe not till a week later.

But there we both were, together, as per usual. Kathy was born when I was only 20 months old, so of course I don't remember a time when I was my parents' only child. In my memories of childhood Kathy was simply always around.

Happy days!

11:00 Lois and I nip out to the butcher's shop in Barnard's Green. I think Lois is slightly fed up with supermarket meat, and wants to buy again from the "real butcher" with his "proper" locally-sourced meat. You know, it's the shop next to Suzanne's, the unisex hair salon.

The butcher looks slightly menacing standing there with his "chopper", but he's a nice chap really. And he sells us some lovely pork chops for tonight's tea, which is nice!

And how long is it since you got a bill looking like this - with items written down by hand with a pen on the back of an old scrap of paper, and added up column by column in the shopkeeper's head?

the Barnard Green Butcher's hand-written bill

Awwww!!!!

[That's enough nostalgia! - Ed]

19:00 After a satisfying tea of the butcher's locally-sourced pork chops, plus apple sauce, mash and green beans, we settle down on the couch to watch the second programme in Ben Fogle's fascinating new travelogue series "Into the Congo with Ben Fogle" on Channel 5.

And the programme prompts a question in my mind and in Lois's mind. Is the proportion of introverts in the Congo the same as it is here in the UK? 

And if it is the same proportion, introverts to extroverts, how do those poor Congolese introverts survive the crazy life down there in the jungle, where seemingly everything that happens is done in public, with an audience of fellow villagers? 

Are those poor Congolese introverts able to find a quiet place to read a book - behind a bush perhaps?  I definitely think we should be told, don't you!

In tonight's episode we see presenter Ben experiencing the culture and customs of the tiny village of Ganga-bongui, deep in the Congolese jungle.

And as Lois and I observe this "unique coming-of-age ceremony", we can't help feeling sorry for those poor Congolese teenage boys, when "rite of passage time" turns out to be almost a week where they're not allowed to sleep, surrounded by annoying non-stop dancing villagers, before finally being circumcised in public. 

And we see the already kind of "dead" expressions on the faces of the poor boys who are the "candidates" for manhood.

The preparatory days of sleep deprivation are supposed to act as some kind of anaesthetic, according to local Congolese opinion - but Lois and I find that hard to believe. Has anybody asked the poor boys for their assessment, or sought their "feedback" ? I bet they haven't !

And the poor boys are  not even allowed to flinch when the "operation" is being carried out - if you flinch, it "brings shame upon your family" apparently. 

What a load of nonsense!

By way of contrast, as presenter Ben is being driven away from the village, he recalls with nostalgia his own coming-of-age "ceremony", in London in the late 1980's.

What a crazy world we live in !!!!

22:00 We've got to get up early tomorrow and have breakfast early. We've got an Ocado supermarket delivery, courtesy of driver Natalie, coming some time between 8:30 am and 9:30 am, as Natalie tells us overnight: 

It's not so easy in Ganga-Boungui, though. When you get up, you have to go out and find your own breakfast, and I don't mean at the nearest McDonald's.

A few nuts and berries maybe, or if you're lucky a nice piece of "bushmeat" from the market, a nice bit of antelope or a porcupine maybe?

Tempting, perhaps [not!], but I think I'll stick to my bowl of Cheerios.

But what a madness it all is !!!!!

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

We go to bed - zzzzzzz!!!!!