Monday May 24th 2021

10:00 For Lois and me, our second day of self-isolating starts today: this is to cover the interval between my COVID test yesterday and my hospital appointment on Wednesday. What madness !!!!!

Connor, my NHS physiotherapist has scheduled a walk for me today, but the self-isolation rules mean we're neither of us allowed to leave our house and garden, so we re-route today's walk to our garden. Lois has measured how many steps it takes to circumnavigate the front garden and back garden, but I forget what the result was. Never mind!

It's useful because we can at the same time do a quick survey of the state of the garden in advance of Mark the Gardener's visit tomorrow. We ring Mark today to put him in the picture, so he won't be offended if we don't try and get close to him like we normally do.

Nick the Fishman is coming tomorrow as well, so we warn him as well: he's going to leave his credit machine in our front porch and withdraw 10 paces, so we can pay him safely and "contactlessly". What madness (again) !!!!!!

first we review the raised beds: note the panes of glass good-heartedly

placed over all seedlings and plants that have been complaining of the cold -

how nice! Also the netting over the cabbage seedlings, to keep the cabbage

butterflies off: clear off you pests haha !

we review our so-called "meadow", which has been left unmown

to encourage wildlife: how kind we are haha!

we review the state of our fruit trees: despite the appalling

weather this spring, our cooking-apple tree has finally blossomed - hurrah!

The main thing we're checking is that there are no ox carcases on our lawns, which has become a bit of a blight on suburban lawns - oh dear! (Source: Onion News).

SCHAUMBURG, IL—The Greater Schaumburg Realtors' Association's annual Parade Of Homes exhibition was marred Saturday by the presence of a rotting ox on the front lawn of one of the model homes on display.

More than two dozen potential home buyers, each of whom paid a $10 fee to participate in the Parade of Homes, requested their money back after coming across the festering ox carcass at 42 Butterfield Lane in the newly developed subdivision of Meadow Crest Village.

Beverly Russo, executive director of the Schaumburg Realtors' Association, apologized to Parade Of Homes participants for the incident and strongly urged them to still consider purchasing a Meadow Crest Village home.

A quick check-round today suggests that our lawns remain largely ox-free, which is a relief, to put it mildly!

One advantage of being in our garden reviewing the state of play, is that it gives us a rare chance to talk to our neighbours, again without getting too close to them, which is nice! 

We find out today that our neighbour Bob, the one who brings us the occasional pheasant or grouse that he's shot, is descended from Catherine Parr, one of the wives of Henry VIII, although he says he's not pursuing a possible claim to the throne, which we think is very wise: no point in making a bunch of lawyers rich at one's own expense, that's for sure! 

And Bob is also second cousin to Bob and Jackie Charlton, the footballers, it turns out. What a distinguished neighbour to have, my god!

our neighbour Bob in happier times -

before he renounced his claim to the throne haha!

13:00 Our 7-year-old twin granddaughters in Australia have been having fun today working with "oobleck", which Lois and I have never heard of, but seems to be a kind of slime originating from a Dr Seuss book. 

Lily (left) together with three of her classmates

whose identity I have tried to disguise with my graphics software:

it's not that they're aliens haha!

Lois and I both feel rather envious of the fun these youngsters are having, and we have looked up the oobleck recipe, which is cornflour-based. We might as well have a bit of fun while we're self-isolating haha!

16:00 Lois and I settle down on the couch and enjoy a cup of Earl Grey tea and some bread and jam. Our 3 grandchildren in England are enthusiastic supporters of Spurs Football Club (Tottenham Hotspurs), particularly Isaac, who's 10. 

We watched a TV programme last night which revealed that Spurs were the only non-league soccer club ever to win the FA Cup, and this big event happened over 120 years ago. Today we decide to send Isaac a picture on whatsapp of a 5-shilling ticket to the celebratory dinner that followed the victory. Lois and I suspect that few of the players would have been able to come to the dinner, because of the price - five shillings (or a "dollar") was a lot of money in those days, plus the requirement for "morning dress" was as good as saying "no riff-raff", in the manner of a Fawlty Towers Gourmet Night. 

a 1901 ticket to a dinner to celebrate amateur soccer club Spurs's

victory in the FA Cup 

Oh dear, what a crazy world they lived in back in those days!!!!

19:30 Lois disappears into the dining-room to take part in her sect's weekly Bible Seminar on zoom. I settle down on the couch and watch a bit more of the Danish crime series "The Killing", which Lois doesn't like.

I'm trying my best with this series, but it's proving a rather disjointed exercise. Tonight I manage to see the second half of Episode 4 and the first half of Episode 5 before Lois comes back in from her zoom session, and I have to switch channels.

So far the story seems to have fallen into two distinct story-lines, the first one based on  the murder of a teenage student after a high school Halloween party, and the other story-line based on a mayoral candidate who's contesting the forthcoming local elections. But what's the connection between the two stories?

Tonight I realise that the high school teacher who's now the main suspect, Rama, is a kind of a protegé of the politician. Now it makes sense!!!

But even after I finish Episode 5 (perhaps later this week?), there's still another 15 episodes to go - yikes !!!!!

21:15 Lois joins me and we watch an old episode of Fawlty Towers (see above), the one about the guest who dies.

Basil Fawlty, the hotel owner, has such a stressful life, that it's good to see him relax for once and enjoy himself and feel good, like when he realises that the guest who has died has not had the chance to even touch the out-of-date kippers on his hotel breakfast tray.

Tremendous fun !!!!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!