Wednesday April 19th 2023

At last I've ordered our lawn-mower, and it's a cordless, which is nice, so no more absent-mindedly cutting through the cord - which is always a bit worrying. And Amazon are going to email me with a password on delivery day, which I've then got to tell the delivery guy. This is my first experience of this security safeguard - is it new? I think I should be told maybe.

Should I bring my mouth next to delivery guy's ear, and whisper, "Listen very carefully - I shall say this only once!", like they used to do on the BBC's World War II French Resistance sitcom "Allo Allo"? Again, I think I should be told - and quickly! 

I have to admit I don't really want to get up all close-and-personal and whisper in the guy's ear - and if he's East European, will he understand me anyway?

Time will tell !

this is how my shiny-new mower will look

I've also earmarked something from BT that will record TV programmes for us - but for now, I'm just storing the order in my Amazon "basket". 

this is how my shiny-new TV recorder will look

However I'm fairly confident that it will be what we need. If we record all the programmes we want to see whatever time of night or day when they're on, and then watch them when it's convenient to us, this will be ideal. At the moment our ability to watch things on "catchup" involves us in too many bits of ancillary equipment and it means that our sofa/TV area is an unsightly mass of wires. 

just a small part of the jungle of wires that

make our living-room look like an electricity substation

- my goodness !!!

We really need a TV recorder. Lois and I like to be tucked up in bed by "around a quarter after ten - we need a lot of sleep and so we like to be in bed by then" (Copyright Abba). And there are lots of interesting programmes, and especially films, that aren't broadcast till after 10 pm, that's for sure.

Oh dear! And we old people are such a trial to our children and grandchildren, that's for sure. Jane Garvey has been writing in the Radio Times about a weekend she spent with her parents recently. For a start, she finds that her parents' TV can only get the old-school so-called "terrestrial channels": disappointing, but she tries to get past that.

Jane likes to unwind on a Saturday night with a glitzy fun Saturday night comic game-show or talent show, like Strictly Come Dancing / Dancing with the Stars, Britain's Got Talent, or Ant & Dec's Takeaway, but her parents - like Lois and me - tend to regard that sort of stuff as a bit rubbishy, and we would probably rather watch a documentary about Henry VIII, for example. Oh dear!

In the end Jane and her parents give up on finding a programme that all three of them would enjoy. Jane suggests "Casualty", the BBC's hospital soap-opera-drama, but of course to her parents, subjects like that are "too close to home", and we sympathise there. Oh dear (again) !!!!

Eventually they turn to the Burt Bacharach evening on BBC2, but like all older people, her parents start talking over the music, wittering on about somebody they know called Veronica, who may or may not have died several years ago.

Time to look at your watch, Jane!

Well at least Lois and I don't bother to stay up just to hear the headlines on the 10pm radio news. We're off up the stairs and into bed before you can say Jack Robinson!

11:00 We go out to post a few letters mid-morning, and we want to check on progress with this new-build estate's planned mini-park, mysteriously labelled "The Leap", somewhere in the middle of the estate. It's nice to see that component parts of the children's yellow-painted slide that we saw on Tuesday dumped quite randomly, has at least now been assembled by the builder Persimmon's staff, although the overall effect still looks a bit random. 

Presumably this isn't how it will look when it's all finished - let's hope not anyway!

"The Leap" the estate's planned mini-park is centre left

we walk round and inspect "The Leap", the estate's planned mini-park

a children's yellow-painted slide has been assembled 

and randomly positioned behind me in the distance,

amid an area of churned-up soil - what utter madness !!!!

later, when we're in bed, we realise that by a complete fluke we can even

see the slide from our own bedroom, in between two of  the houses opposite 

Yes, we can see the slide when we're in bed - what are the chances of that happening, eh? Doesn't that totally negate the most basic tenets of Einstein's Universe? [No! - Ed]  Perhaps I could ask some of the pundits on the quora forum website, do you think? [Not if you care for your reputation! - Ed]

What a crazy estate we live on !!!!

17:30 Lois disappears into the kitchen-diner to take part in her great-niece Molly's chair yoga class on zoom.

a seated Lois, with feet on a block, takes part

in her great-niece Molly's chair yoga class on zoom

And Lois is back in there again at 8 pm to take part in her church's Bible Class, also on zoom.

21:15 When Lois emerges, we settle down on the sofa and watch the second episode of a new Australian sitcom, "Colin From Accounts".

An amusing episode which, groundbreakingly, starts off with Ashley, now moved in with Gordon but sleeping in a separate bedroom, coming into Gordon's room in the middle of the night and peeing in his sock-drawer, apparently confusing it with the toilet. 

I don't think that's ever been done before in a British sitcom, so with all the sitcom clichés we have over here, it's refreshing once more to see something completely different from comedy writers down under, that's for sure. I suppose it could be that it's actually bit of a cliché over there now, but I don't know that for sure haha'

Ashley, in a semi-dreamlike state, creeps into Gordon's room

in the middle of the night and pees in his sock drawer,

apparently confusing it with the toilet - my goodness!

There are one or two reminders of "our modern world" tonight. The first is a sort of a disclaimer that flashes up before the episode begins:

Is that weird, or is that weird? I guess it shows how nervous people have become of being bound to offend somebody somewhere, no matter what they do!

Later, when Gordon takes his new blind date to a restaurant, their waiter, a guy called Dean, comes up an introduces himself like this:

Lois and I have never seen a waiter introducing himself in this way, so it's nice to get a sort of a warning in advance, so as not to seem too surprised when it does happen. That's how we look at it anyway: call us obsessive future-planners if you like haha!

Is that joke transphobic? Gordon's date seems to think it is, because she's apparently got some trans friends.

My goodness you have to be careful what you say these days, don't you haha!!!!

21:45 An email comes in from Steve, our American brother-in-law. He's been invited to a Coronation Big Lunch in Philadelphia, by the Daughters of the British Empire, which is nice!

Lois and I unfortunately can't go, because that's about the time Sarah is finally expected back in the area after her 7 years in Australia. The best we can do will be to try and copy the DBE's programme of activities - i.e. the sing-songs etc, in our little back garden! Well, we'll see what we can do!

If it works, we'll post up some photos for you!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzz!!!!!!