Danskcolin: Tuesday June 13th 2023

Lois and I want a quiet day today - the temperature's going to be up to 82F /28C, so we just want to float around the house, lightly clad, in the morning, with the windows open, and then go up to bed in the afternoon and turn our bed-height floor-standing electric fan up to "max". Call us lazy and feckless if you like, but it just feels so good to do it every now and again - you ought to try it our way some time. Go on, you know you want to!

After all, this heatwave is never going to last for ever, now, is it!

At the same time, while we're relaxed, self-absorbed, off guard and generally oblivious to the outside world, our calendar is filling up like crazy for July and August - and it's starting to make us panic, just a little bit.

our calendar for July and August is really starting to fill up - yikes!!!

For a start, we're due to be pet-sitting, over in Headley, Hampshire, for our elder daughter Ali and family in July, while they're on holiday.

And also in July, if possible, we also want to go to a concert featuring piano recitals by Alison's two daughters, Josie (16) and Rosalind (14). And finally in July we certainly don't want to miss seeing Alison's son Isaac (12) flying across the stage as one of the Darling Family in his school's production of Peter Pan the Musical at Petersfield.

Yikes, can we fit it all in??!!!!

Isaac is singing one of the songs in the musical, and he's also going to be flying across the stage at one point.

Last time we saw Isaac, after rehearsals had already begun, I only had one piece of advice for Isaac as regards the flying scene, which was not to scream while flying through the air, however much you may feel like doing so, because if you do, it'll really take a lot of the magic out of the spectacle, especially in front of such a predominantly young audience - that's for sure!

And the children in the audience might start screaming too, which would be uncomfortable for Lois and me, and also possibly for the other older grown-ups sitting there. But particularly uncomfortable for us, because Alison has got us front-row seats.

Oh dear!

the scene that our grandson, Isaac (12) will take part in on stage,

- and remember not to scream, Isaac haha!

Despite our slight panic at this sudden rush of dates for our calendar, it's pleased us overall, because, until Alison's text arrived, Lois and I were feeling slightly down because of the awful news from the US about Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigeig (crazy name, crazy guy!) and his third consecutive driving test failure. Pete is a graduate of Oxford University, and my goodness I know why Pete feels a bit sore about his latest test fiasco. Oh dear!

WASHINGTON—Insisting that he had done nearly everything right this time, Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg reportedly failed his third consecutive driving test on Monday. “It’s kind of bullshit, because it was really only the parallel parking part that I screwed up,” said Buttigieg, describing how he always began to freeze up and panic during that section of the exam as he tried to remember exactly how to locate ten and two o’clock on the wheel.

“Also, not for nothing, but I’ve had Hank as my examiner the last two times, and he’s a total piece of shit. He said I rolled through a stop sign, and that’s not true. He’s just a jerk. I also barely grazed that car. It’s insane that he gets to administer these things, because he’s obviously blind. Goddammit, now I have to go back to the Department of Transportation and stare everyone down. They all act like big shots because they got their licences.”

At press time, sources confirmed the visibly glum transportation secretary was telling his husband to “just shut up” after Chasten Buttigieg picked him up from the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles) and said he’d definitely pass next time.

I feel really sorry for Pete, partly because of an astonishing coincidence - Hank, Pete's examiner, was my examiner too, when he worked at Summertown Driving Test Centre, Oxford, back in the old days.

I took my first 2 tests in 1968, when Hank was just a young local undergraduate student, looking to supplement his student grant. He's living and working in the Washington DC area now, and he must be well into his 90's, in my estimation. What a guy! But seriously flawed at the same time, which is how we like our heroes, isn't it, so fair enough!

Oxford Driving Test Centre as it looks today

Well, both my first two tests were failures - both times I failed over reversing-round-a-corner, and I only got through the test the third time because Hank had a serious illness on the crucial day, for which I thanked my lucky stars!

But what a crazy world we live in !!!!!

19:45 Lois disappears into the kitchen to take part in the first of her Tewkesbury church's latest series of Bible seminars on zoom. Earlier today I caught her doing a quick check on a reference. She's so conscientious - I wish I could be more like her!

Lois doing a quick check on a reference earlier today,

in preparation for her church's Bible Seminar tonight

Meanwhile I have to stay alert near the front door, because Francis, our other daughter Sarah's husband, is going to be ringing the door-bell at some time known only to himself, and then going upstairs to collect the family's other belongings, load them into the family's tiny electric Austin Mini Cooper, and take them back to the 3-bedroom rental home in Alcester that the family took possession of last Saturday.

Sarah and family, following their return from their 7 years in Australia, have spent the last month living half their time in a tent in a field, and the rest of their time crammed into our tiny house with Lois and me.

flashback to last week: the family's tent in a field

at Ashton-under-Hill, near Evesham

some more of the family's stuff, still up there in one of our bedrooms

- my goodness !!!!!!

20:00 Francis arrives and collects the family's stuff, and then Lois and I settle down on the couch to watch some more of the Channel 5 retrospective on the astonishingly popular old sitcom "Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em" from the 1970's and 1980's, which starred Michael Crawford as the babyish and accident-prone man-child Frank Spencer.

In this classic sitcom, Michael played the immature man-child Frank Spencer, and Michele Dotrice played Frank's wife Betty. And I always used to think that, together, they were a bit like a couple of school-children somehow inhabiting the bodies of two adults.

Despite the immaturity, however, Frank eventually manages to pass his driving test, unlike poor old Pete Buttigeig, and the couple even somehow manage to have a baby, to everybody's surprise, especially Frank's. What a madness it all was!

And there'll never be another sitcom like this one - that's for sure - now that we're living in this slightly mental Age of Health and Safety. My goodness, no !!!!

Michael famously insisted on doing all his own death-defying stunts. And everybody remembers the episode where Frank and Betty park their car intent on having a picnic, only to discover that they've somehow managed to stop on a cliff-edge, half-overhanging the English Channel at Beachy Head.

the mayhem that ensues, half off the cliffs at Beachy Head,

after Frank tries to retrieve the couple's picnic hamper from the car-boot

What a madness it all was !!!!!

But we also see clips from another famous episode tonight. And we hope against hope that Isaac, our grandson, isn't watching, because he's due to be flying through the air on stage at Petersfield next month in his school's production of Peter Pan the Musical.

Look away now, Isaac haha!!!!

You must remember this one, from that famous Christmas special? You know, the one showing the local Christmas nativity-play, in which Frank was playing a "Frank Spencer" version of the Angel Gabriel, somewhat incongruously still wearing Frank's trademark beret?

And do you remember the huge audiences the show used to get? I know there were only 3 TV channels when it started, but even so, it was total madness, wasn't it !!!!