Danskcolin: Monday April 4th 2022

08:00 A bad start to the day - I look at my smartphone and I see that Hungary's crazy and corrupt Prime Minister, Viktor Orbán, has increased his parliamentary majority in yesterday's General Election.

Strangely, though, my Hungarian pen-friend Tünde tells me that Orbán has failed to get the valid results he wanted in the simultaneous referenda on LGBTQ and child-protection issues. I gather that this is because the rules make it harder to get a valid result on a referendum than to win a two-thirds majority in Parliament, a majority which gives the governing party the right to continue to alter the electoral system to its own advantage.

But what a crazy world we live in !!!!

In the meantime Orbán can continue to enjoy what German comedian Jan Bömmermann calls his "study", the massive Buda Castle.

German comedian Jan Bömmermann showcases Orbán's "study"

the massive Buda Castle

Oh dear, poor Hungarians!!!! But why did they vote for that awful man????!!!

I mean it - WHY????!!!!!

10:45 Lois and I take our walk over the local football field - it's perishing cold, and there are very few people about, so we take our chance to try some of the new play equipment in the playground after its recent £35k upgrade. Tee-hee - what fun!!!!

we try out some of the new play equipment in the playground

following its £35k upgrade - tee hee !!!

flashback to last month: Parish Councillor Hamish Beach

announces the upgrade to the world's press

As we continue our walk, more people appear from out of the "woodwork", mainly dog-walkers (or dog-airers, as the Danes say). I think that some days Lois and I must look particularly friendly, because we find people go out of their way to talk to us - whereas on other days we get ignored: we seem to be invisible. What madness !!!

Today it's one of our so-called "friendly days" and we find that people are seeking us out to "chew the fat", including an 83-year-old man who's broken his back and is also having problems with his children - whatever next at that age!!!!

And we also bump into Roger, one of my retired work-colleagues, whom, 30 years ago or more, I was working on some long-forgotten secret project with. How crazy it all seems now !!!!

We have a chat with Roger about the old days. He is now a widower, but his daughter Claire was at school with our two girls in the 1980's - now Claire has a daughter coming up to 21.

Isn't it madness to have a grandchild who's 21 !!! And in our turn we have to admit to "Old Roger" that our eldest granddaughter Josie will be 16 in September. What a crazy world we live in !!!! [That's enough craziness! - Ed]

as Lois is taking this picture of me, who should

come in through the so-called "gap between the fields"

than my ex-work colleague, "Old Roger"

Roger in close-up: behind him you can see the horrible

new apartments being built in the field's so-called "extra bit"

Lois and I are out a bit early today. Usually on our Monday walks, Lois and I go out about 11:30 am, so that we can catch a glimpse of the local old men risking death by playing soccer in the netball court, the so-called "Old Codgers". We're out earlier than usual today, however, so we're going to have to miss out on that particular pleasure this morning - we're taking our walk a bit early simply because Stephen, our friendly local handyman, is coming to our house around 12 noon to do some bits and pieces of decorating.

flashback to last month: the local Old Codgers turn up for their soccer practice

flashback: we pose for a selfie on our way home - in the background to the left

the Old Codgers can be seen limbering up for their soccer game in the netball court.

We like to "be there" for the Old Codgers when we can so we can cheer them on (silently), and maybe also use our phones to call the County Air Ambulance in case of a medical emergency.

Plus, we always like to admire the attempts of their manager, the ashen-faced Ron Knee (59), former manager of Neasden FC, to get the team out of the so-called "relegation zone". And the squad themselves know us affectionately as "Sid and Doris Bonkers", their fanatical (and only) fans. It's all tremendous fun haha!!!! [If you say so! - Ed]

12:30 We arrive home in time to greet our friendly local handyman, Stephen, who arrives to do a bit more touching up of the paintwork in our larder and downstairs loo. His work is all intended to progress our project to eventually put our house on the market, and downsize to a smaller one.

Lois later showcases some of handyman Stephen's

"touching-up" work in our larder

Stephen is basically trying to make our house seem a bit less like a disaster area.

At the same time we're gradually trying to get rid of things in the house that we don't need, but it's all proceeding at a snail's pace unfortunately.

At the end of last week we tried to donate 6 bags of our unwanted clothing to the Iranian Christian refugees who are members of Lois's sect - they've recently arrived in the Cheltenham and Gloucester area from London, allegedly with very few clothes other than the ones they're stood up in.

However, I was a bit annoyed, a couple of days ago, to find that the refugees had "rejected" many of my cast-off shirts, trousers and jackets, on the grounds that they "weren't fashionable", or on the grounds that they were "not the kind of things we wear".

What madness!!

But having today seen pictures of the guys on Lois's phone, I can see that they're undeniably fashionable young guys who probably wouldn't be seen dead in one of my "for-the-office" striped shirts - shirts that might have been the in-thing to look "business-y" in, a couple of decades ago, but probably not in 2022. So fair enough, I suppose! It's still a little bit annoying nonetheless, I feel!

some of the typical Iranian refugees, the kind that don't want any

of my so-called "smart", "business-y" striped shirts from the 1990's - oh dear!

one of my striped shirts that the refugees rejected -

poor shirt !!!!!

Today, Lois's fellow-sect member Mari-Ann asks Lois whether she can sell any of the clothes of ours that the refugees rejected.

The idea would be to raise money to buy bikes for the refugees, she says. And we say "Okay by us!". Well, after all, we just want to get rid of the clothes - when we move house we may have less than a third of the wardrobe space we have now, so no problem! Take them, please, somebody haha !!!!!

flashback to Mari-Ann (right) in happier times:

with her Polish daughter-in-law Sylvia

19:00 After dinner we get on the computer. Our elder daughter Alison, who lives in Headley, Hampshire, with Ed and their 3 children Josie (15), Rosalind (13) and Issac (11) are hoping to spend the weekend here, so we need to order some ready-meals from CookShop. We order two meals-for-8, the cottage pie (again) and the Moroccan Spiced Lamb Tagine. For desserts there'll be a choice of chocolate-and-raspberry roulade, lemon drizzle slice, and billionaire's shortbread.

CookShop's chocolate-and-raspberry roulade: yum yum!

We order the cottage pie again a bit reluctantly because we always seem to order this meal when Alison's family come - the problem is that the children are at that awkward age when there's a lot of things they don't like - oh dear!

20:00 We settle down on the couch to watch last night's edition of Countryfile, a series that looks at various rural issues the length and breadth of the UK.

As usual the programme includes a segment from Adam Henson's farm in the Cotswolds, where this time he tells us a bit about his herd of Exmoor ponies.

Adam Henson with the latest news from his farm in the Cotswolds,

looking forward to a busy day with his herd of Exmoor ponies

Adam's father apparently gave him a present of an Exmoor pony as a gift 40-odd years ago, and Adam has kept the breed going on his farm: at present he's got 6 of them, all mares.

Exmoor ponies have been around and braving the UK's often harsh climate for thousands of years, and they've got some extraordinary qualities, Adam explains. They've got amazingly strong eyebrows, known as "toad eye", an area of prominent flesh around the eye: whenever it snows or rains, all the moisture just runs off the top of their eyes.

If only Lois and I had a pair of those - my god!!!

Secondly they have these amazing coats, with so-called "guard hairs" on the surface, and then, underneath that, there's this downy layer that keeps them nice'n'warm. Ooh yes, can Lois and I have some of that too please haha!!!!

And when the ponies are on their native Exmoor in Devon, there's this thing called "snow thatching". When it snows, the snow just stays on their bodies because their coats aren't letting enough heat through to melt it. So the snow just "thatches" on their backs, and the ponies have to shake it off.

And does anybody still doubt the awesome power of the mating instinct? If you do, you won't any longer after you've seen tonight's programme.

Farmer Adam has a surprise today for his 4 mares - in a remote stable-yard on the farm, he's been keeping hidden, in isolation, a young male called "Willow Warbler" that Adam has borrowed from Thomas, a farmer friend over in Brecon, Wales.

Since growing up, Willow Warbler has never been with a mare in his life - until today. But as soon as Adam leads him out of his stables, the young male becomes almost uncontrollable - I guess he can smell Adam's mares from hundreds of yards away. My god !!!!

"Let me get at them!", neighs "WW", in his little pony-voice!!!!

It's as much as Adam can do to hold him back - since growing up, young Willow Warbler has never been with mares before, but he knows instinctively what they're for, no doubt about that! No sex education classes needed for him haha !!!