Monday February 9th 2026 "Have YOU bought YOUR Spring 2026 designer 'clobber' yet? Frankie say, 'Relax, don't do it' haha!!!!

Yes, Friends, have YOU got your "Spring 2026" designer wardrobe "clobber"? Well, there's good news from Paris today - you may not need to bother, which is a relief!!!

Onion News has more....

Kudos, those designers!

And reading the Onion story this morning, here in semi-idyllic Liphook, Hampshire brings a look of weirdly grim determination to the faces of me and my wife Lois, to put it mildly!

me and my wife Lois - a recent picture

And in deference to Paris, for our first truly "springtime walk" of the new season, which will be over Old Man Lowsley's Farm, Lois and I have elected to wear the same clothes we wore this time last year (and the year before that, if we're honest!!!). [What about 2023 etc etc ? - Ed]

Notwithstanding all that (!), there's an unmistakeable "spring in our step" today - no pun intended!!! - because for one morning, at least, it's not raining here in Liphook, and signs of spring are everywhere, with the birds (and even some local residents, no names no packdrill!) practising their mating calls, and a mild touch of colour returning both to cheeks and to woodlands and garden, would you believe!!!

[Beautifully written paragraph, Colin, if you don't mind my saying so! - Ed]

[Thanks! - Colin]

We even see some daffodils cautiously popping into flower, and catkin-type things looking more colourful, into the bargain, not just on the farm but even with crocuses and snowdrops etc appearing in our own dear back garden, would you believe!

[Good summary, Colin! - Ed] 

[Thanks! - Colin]

(above) daffodils and catkins on Old Man Lowsley's Farm and (below)

a shrub in our garden we don't know the name of, plus some crocuses, which is nice!

"But surely, Colin, it must be more than a few scraggy flowers that's putting such a spring in yours and Lois's step today?", I hear you cry!

And you're right to make that point, too, because Lois and I get some really good news today - and remember, you saw it here first!!!!

Yes, we're going to be a mummy and daddy again (!!!!), which is a surprise, given that we're both "knocking on 80" and, later this year, we'll be celebrating our new "Premium Old Codger" status, with various automatic  privileges on super-low admission prices to museums and Saga "Old Codger" Tours and Cruises etc etc haha!!!!

a typical pair of "old codgers", delighted by news of some 

new, very favourable, discounts

It's quite a surprise too, because, after Lois gave birth to our second daughter Sarah in 1977, we thought that we'd better quit, while we were ahead!!!

flashback to 1977: us, with daughters Alison (2) and new-born Sarah:

- happy days!!!!

And now, here we are in 2026, nearly 50 years later, seeing if we can find our old guides to parenting etc, and our "Dr Spock" paperbacks etc etc! It's crazy!!!

one of the ancient parenting guides we brought our two daughters 

up on, way back in the 1970's, would you believe !!!!

As it happens, we can't find our old books on parenting, but no matter - we probably won't need them for the 2 weeks in June that we'll be "parenting" our 15-year-old grandson Isaac, so fingers crossed !!!!! 

Isaac is more likely to be "parenting" us, rather than the other way about - luckily he's more than capable of that job, impossible though it may seem to outsiders !!!!!

flashback to last month: (left to right) our son-in-law Edward, Isaac (15), Josie (19)

Rosalind (17) and our daughter Alison, on a skiing trip to northern Sweden

Yes, you've guessed it! We've been asked to be "mummy and daddy" to Isaac for strictly temporary, practical reasons. Isaac's parents - our daughter Alison and husband Edward - have been told that they must leave their temporary rental home at the end of May, when their lease is up and their landlords have decided to put the house on the market.

This is happening at a super-inconvenient time for the family - our granddaughter Rosalind (17) will be taking her A-Levels, and Isaac (15) will be taking his GCSEs, which is super-annoying. And the family won't be able to move back into their own proper home until a month or two later, because it's still being extensively refurbished. How annoying for them is that?!

And it kind of makes sense for Isaac to be staying here with Lois and me for those 2 weeks, because his school is just around the corner from us here in Liphook, so Bob's your uncle on that one.

flashback to October: our grandson Isaac (15), just finished school

for the day, with his mum, our daughter Alison, who's come to pick him up

See? Job done!

Will this do?

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzz!!!!!

Sunday February 8th 2026 "Friends, are YOU older-than-you'd-like and 'gagging' for more stimulation? Well, look no further!"

Yes, Friends, are YOU perhaps older than you'd like, and, at the same time, 'gagging' for more stimulation in your free time? Well, look no further than your copy of today's local Onion News for East Hampshire!!!!

"Middle-aged at heart" - that almost perfectly describes me and my wife Lois "to a tee", although personally I'm being a bit more cautious for a while, preferring the label "elderly-to-middle-aged-at-heart", which is the phrase I still prefer to use, whenever applying for jobs at our local branch of Gregg's Bakeries, for example, here in leafy, semi-luscious Liphook, Hampshire, to put it mildly!

me and my wife Lois - some recent pictures

Nevertheless, Romansky's advice - see Onion story above for details! - is certainly inspirational reading for us. To be honest, we can't really be bothered to apply for too many jobs, or for any jobs at all, if we're frank!

Although currently "resting" between jobs ourselves, since we both retired 20 years ago, you can't say we don't know our limits!!!! 

[When are you two noggins NOT resting, Colin! - Ed]. 

Nevertheless the Onion story makes us even more determined to seek some younger company today, to lower our mental age a bit, and "get down with the kids" in a way that only we know how!

Lois and me, showing our lighter side (!)

Starting as we mean to go on, Lois and I revel today in our usual Sunday morning "catch-up" whatsapp call to our dear daughter Sarah and our dear twin-granddaughters Lily and Jessica 9000 miles away in Perth, Australia, where the twins have just finished their first week at "big school", a private Anglican school in the city's northern suburbs. 

(above) Lois and me beginning our regular Sunday morning "catch-up" call

with Perth, Australia, and (below) the twins in their new uniforms, and their new "big school"

It's been a big week in those two 12-year-olds' lives, that's for sure. And they're already studying things that Lois and I were never taught at our old schools back in the 1950's! Things like 'civics' (?) and 'food science and technology', for example, although Lois suspects that 'food science and technology' is just a fancy label for 'cooking', would you believe! 

What madness!!!!

students at our twin granddaughters' new school studying

"food science and technology", whatever that is, when it's at home!!!

This term's sport will be cricket, they tell us - and it's still uncomfortably hot in Perth, apparently, and "everybody's just longing for March", when things will start to cool off a bit. 

What a crazy planet we live on  !!!!

14:00 And later on today, Lois and I have the strange experience of not sitting in an audience composed entirely of "old codgers", which makes a refreshing change! Our grandson Isaac is playing not one but two roles in the local "performing arts" group's production of "Legally Blonde the Musical" in a theatre in nearby Haslemere, just over the county line in Surrey.

flashback to September: Lois and I wait outside Haslemere Hall

to pick up our grandson Isaac after his first rehearsal of "Legally Blonde"

The story is all about a seemingly 'ditsy' blonde manicurist, Elle, whose boy-friend dumps her to go to Boston and study law at the prestigious Harvard Law School. Elle gets her revenge on him by applying to go there herself, and, unexpectedly perhaps, she finds herself getting accepted. Something like that, anyway!

(top left) us, for once sitting in an audience not entirely made up of "old codgers" (!),

watching our grandson Isaac (below), seen here in two scenes of the musical

Isaac has a part as a fellow Harvard Law School new entrant, Aaron Schultz, where he gets to sing a song - see picture above, bottom right! How cool is that!!!!

He also has a second part in the musical, as a "hunky" UPS delivery guy, who catches a manicurist's eye when he comes to deliver a package to her in Elle's nail-bar. You'll remember this scene from the film version, I'm sure!

Knowing that our Isaac is also playing the new UPS guy, Lois and I, sitting in the audience this afternoon, are a bit nervous about this scene coming up. And that's because in the film version, Elle tries to get the "hunky" new UPS guy to look at her legs by executing a clumsy "bend-and-snap" manoeuvre when he approaches her with a package, and he ends up with a broken nose. 

A "bend-and-snap" manoeuvre is when a woman pretends to drop something on the floor, and bends down to pick it up, so he gets a good look at her legs. Then the guy tries to help her, and she straightens herself up right in front of the him, so that, ideally, so they finish up face to face. 

In the film, however, the manicurist "muffs" the manoeuvre: the UPS guy gets too close, and the manicurist breaks his nose. Yikes! Poor Isaac - we hope he's ready for that scene !!!!

And for this afternoon's performance, Lois has brought along a bunch of band-aids in her handbag, in case they're needed, but fortunately the production's back-stage staff have thought ahead and provided Isaac with a free one, so when Isaac appears in his next scene, he's suitable "all bandaged up", which is a relief! And by the time the show's closing number comes up, the bandage has clearly been taken off, so it must have been just a surface wound, so no worries there! 

Lois and me, before the performance begins - Lois has

a bunch of band-aids in her handbag, fortunately not needed !!!!

[It's only a story, remember, Colin! - Ed]

Well, Lois and I both had a jolly good laugh afterwards, while secretly pleased that Isaac's face hasn't been "damaged for life", at any rate, which is nice (!).

But there's a more serious question here too, isn't there. 

Isaac was obviously assigned the part of the "hunky" new UPS guy for a reason - he must be being perceived as being at least a bit "hunky" himself. Have you thought of that?! And it's a slightly weird experience this afternoon for Lois and me to hear the manicurists in the show referring to "our Isaac" as "walking porn" (!). What madness, isn't it !!!

But where did Isaac inherit his "hunkiness" from? For myself, I'm pretty clear that it must be me, but Lois isn't so sure! Your views welcome, however - postcards only !!!!!

flashback to the 1960's: me as a sixth-former "oozing hunk", (left) as I

get ready to go to school in the morning, and (right) sitting in front of the "telly"

in the afternoon, after school, in a rocking-chair, waiting for programmes to begin

I wonder.....!

And I hereby promise to tabulate all feedback received and to give you a "digest" in a later blog-post, so watch this space!!!

Will this do?

[Oh just to to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzz!!!!!

Saturday February 7th 2026 "Men, honestly! 'Can't fold a shirt for toffee', as we used to say!"

Yes, Friends, is there a man in YOUR circle who has trouble folding his shirts? There are plenty of these 'bozos' around, aren't there, including Yours Truly, if I'm honest!

And 'watching a man fold a shirt' is said to be one of the oldest entertainments in the world, and it's still happening, would you believe, that is, if you can trust this morning's local Onion News for East Hampshire! 

Poor guy !!!!!

It's a pretty general failing with us men, isn't, but with one honourable exception. Step forward Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory sitcom, who famously was able to even show women, if you please, exactly how it's done!

a typical episode of the Big Bang Theory sitcom: Sheldon Cooper (Jim Parsons)

shows housemate Penny (Kaley Cuoco) how you fold a shirt

Kudos, Sheldon!

However, reading that Onion News "shocker" today brings a knowing grin to the faces of my wife Lois and me, here at our lovely home in leafy, semi-suburban Liphook, Hampshire, I have to say! 

my wife Lois and me - recent pictures

The reason for that knowing grin on our faces? Well, we're bound for an outing this morning to nearby shopping-hub Petersfield,  where we're sure to end up finding ourselves in one of the town's many clothing stores taking clothes off hangers and out of piles on counters, and then, later, putting them back (!), and finally buying something or other for Lois - a 'reduced' skirt perhaps -  to put it mildly!  

I can't blame Lois for seizing the opportunity - Petersfield's clothes shops are pretty seductive, with their subdued lighting and their well-turned-out, menopausal female servers. 

a typical Edinburgh Wool Mill outlet - there's a 

handy branch in Petersfield, Hampshire, which is nice!

And it's a good chance, admittedly, for Lois to stock up, whenever we're in Petersfield, because, needless to say, tiny, semi-rural Liphook doesn't have a single clothes shop, unless you count the minimal stocks in a small corner of Liphook's Sainsbury's supermarket, or ordering from a catalogue in the store's miniscule 'Argos concession'. 

What madness, isn't it!

Lois this morning, in nearby Petersfield's bustling Edinburgh Wool Shop,

(left) choosing a jumper, and (right) trying on an attractive, reduced skirt 

(only £10, which is crazy!) in one of the store's poorly-lit fitting-rooms

Our main worry this morning however, is not to forget, amid all this skirt-buying madness (!), the real reason why we're in Petersfield today - to take along the home-made Nutella cake that Lois baked yesterday to her church's "drop-in centre", or "pop-in centre" as it's called. It's the first Saturday of the month, and the church is holding its usual coffee-and-cake morning: these sessions advertise the church's presence in the town, as well as raising money for third-world charities.

Lois's church's drop-in centre in Petersfield, 

or "pop-in centre" as it's dubbed, which is nice!

We have to get there early before the "pop-in centre" opens for business, so that Lois can deliver her cake and cut it into slices etc before the "punters" "pop in" later. It's nice and quiet when we arrive, and we get a chance to sit with a coffee and a cheese scone in a bit of peace, for once! And it's cheese scones on our plates, not Nutella cake, because of Lois's current dietary restrictions: and Yours Truly is "going along for the low-sugar ride", to help lose some of the pounds I put on over Christmas: oh dear!!!!

So see if YOU can guess who that poor little old man in the 30-year-plus old cloth cap is, in the third of these three following revealing photos!!!! No prizes offered haha!!!!!

us this morning, before opening time, at the drop-in centre organised

by Lois's church in bustling Petersfield, Hampshire, delivering Lois's home-made

Nutella cake while restricting ourselves to some low-fat cheese scones - what madness!!!!

Poor little old man haha !!!!!

[You old fraud, Colin. Isn't that a "chocolate crunch" on your plate there? - Ed]

And I really don't know how old my cloth cap is. 'Thirty years' is almost certainly an underestimate. I certainly used to wear it to work, although I always took it off once I got inside the building. And come March 2026, Lois and I will have been retired for exactly 20 years, so that cap is certainly older than that!!!!

What madness, isn't it !!!!!!

21:00 We go to bed on Alice Roberts' latest (!!!!) archaeological travelogue series, this one being about the Roman Empire, starting in Pompeii. Yes, I know, Alice has got at least 3 series going on concurrently at the moment, this one on Channel 4, as well as her "Holy Grail" series on Sky, and her "Digging for Britain" series on BBC2.

All these Alice-style programmes, are a blessing for Lois and me, however, because we don't much care for sports (see Radio Times above!), or for game-shows, so if you're like us, you're pretty much "stuffed" for TV choices most of the time. But what a crazy world we live in!!!

We notice that, when Alice is walking through towns in the Middle East or in Mediterranean countries, she seems to be able to slip around unrecognised, whereas her TV archaeology rival Bettany Hughes is constantly being greeted with smiles and requests for selfies etc. 

Lois and I have the theory that people in those countries like their women big and busty, like Bettany, whereas Alice cultivates the slim, waif-ish, dyed-hair, "biker-chick" image, which doesn't have the same appeal over there. But your views welcome!

rival archaeological travelogue series presenters, and their polar opposite styles:

(left) Alice with her waif-like biker-chick image, and (right) Bettany

I wonder.....!

But "Not another programme about Pompeii, Colin!", I hear you cry! But Lois and I think that Alice is amazing at picking up on some of the extraordinary details that are often overlooked by other presenters. Like, for example, the fact that many of the skeletons and casts of people found in the act of running from the 79AD eruption of nearby volcano Mt. Vesuvius, were actually carrying their house keys on them, no doubt expecting to return home later after the "fuss" was over. Heart-breaking isn't it.

And the incredible thing about Pompeii is that, over 400 years since the ruined town was first discovered (in 1594), Pompeii was such a large city in Roman times that a whole 54 acres of it (22 hectares) still hasn't been dug up and examined.

Recently work began on a totally new area, containing a massive 750-acre mansion and grounds belonging to an as yet unidentified wealthy individual, as Alice discovers in this sequence:

The mansion contained a huge banqueting hall  - Donald Trump, eat your heart out! And this banqueting hall was adorned with frescoes depicting the story of a wealthy woman. Although wealthy and "respectable", the woman in the frescoes has been tempted into joining a feminist cult - the so-called 'maenad women', devoted to Dionysus (Bacchus), the god of wine and revelry, who indulged in so-called 'Bacchanalian' orgies.

The Roman Empire was alive with diverse cults and religions at this time, and the cult of Dionysus was just one, attracting women in particular, called maenads, mythologised women to be seen everywhere in these newly-discovered frescoes.

Fascinating stuff, isn't it!

But what a crazy world they lived in, back in those mad, far-off days !!!!!

Will this do?

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzz!!!!