Thursday, November 15, 2018

09:00 We get up. I pull the front door open to pick up the six pints that our milkman has delivered and I see that Bob, our neighbour, has put a dead pheasant next to the bottles - damn! Bob likes to hunt and shoot and he gives us an average of 2-3 pheasants a year.

I talk a little with Lois about the pheasant. It's a lot of work to prepare pheasants for cooking and she is currently not that keen on the idea, especially given her current back problems. She decides to store the pheasant in a bag in the pantry for 1-2 days. And she will limit herself to using only the breast to save work. But we do not want the pheasant to have died in vain ha ha.

We'd rather Bob didn't give us pheasants, but in the past we have always thanked him for them, and said how delicious they are, so as not to hurt his feelings. The problem with that is, that then he just gives us more and more of them - yikes!

This kind of thing is a bit of a awkward situation, especially for us British. It can be classified as one of the thousands of "very British problems" (copyright Channel 4), or "agonising British problems" (copyright Buzzfeed).

for example: not quite catching someone's name, and ...

 ...realising that you can never talk to them again.

What madness !!!

or - resigning oneself to a unusual and laborious commuting route by bus and train

rather than risk having to share the commute with a work colleague

10:00 Lois' back pain seems much worse today, and she is only moving about the house with difficulty. But there is some improvement during the morning - she goes for her usual walk around the local football field, but she asks me to accompany her in the event of further problems. Poor Lois !!!!

The sun is shining however and she has fun playing the tourist guide and pointing out the best blackberry hedges, and the worst ones, and also the average ones, so that I am updated in preparation for 2019, which is nice.

Lois' back, and my hips: they are our biggest weaknesses, but we have both turned 72 this year, we have to admit. And we do not know which of our body parts will break down next - the jury is still out on that one.

We recall Bruce Lifschitz, a 45 year old local man who recently hit the world's headlines when he admitted to journalists that he had had some surprises in this area of his life (source: Onion News).

While saying that he had always known that "everything would fall apart sooner or later", he acknowledged his surprise that his body was breaking down in a completely different order than he expected.

"I have had knee pain since I was in my 20's so I honestly thought they would be the first to give me real problems but no: my back completely gave out on me out of the blue and now I cannot move between a seated and standing position without my back flaring up", Lifschitz said, adding that he had previously predicted that he would be totally bald at this point in his life, but he noted with astonishment that his ongoing hair loss had been outpaced by his chronic heartburn and sharply increasing blood pressure.

"I thought the order would be: knee first, then hair, then prostate, and maybe eye sight and memory after that. I did not even consider that these stomach ulcers would come up. At this point in time, I really cannot say which part of me will give way next."

Lifschitz noted that for what it was worth, his arms were good and they did not seem to be at risk of failing anytime soon, which is nice to hear, that's for sure!

Lois and I talk a little about Bruce's problems as we walk home from the football field. We recall that his revelations caused a sensation at the time, but the story-line has since dropped out of the headlines, which is quite typical, we point out  - ("just saying") !!!!

11:00 We come home and relax with a cup of coffee on the couch. We have decided not to take our unwanted electrical appliances to the Stoke Orchard Recycling Centre today - we will have to postpone until next week. A 2-day racing festival starts tomorrow and there will be a lot of traffic jams in the area, that's for sure.

I go out into the garage to estimate how many unwanted appliances are hiding there. But it's hard to be sure, because our daughter Sarah and her husband, Francis, left behind all their unwanted do-it-yourself gear, car tools, car accessories, children's equipment, etc. in our garage when they moved to Australia 3 years ago, and it's really hard to see what's what, I have to say!

Good grief, what madness !!!

But I get a buzz when I look at the size of the challenge. I love a good challenge! I decide to prioritise the removal of children's equipment: strollers, car seats, high chairs, etc. We hope that some charity shops we know in Bishops Cleeve will accept them. We will have to see.

12:30 We have lunch and afterwards I go to bed and take a huge afternoon nap. I get up at 3 pm.

I get going reading further pages of Njal's saga, which was written in Iceland in the 12th century or so.

Unna, a nice Icelandic girl, has got divorced from Hrut, her (ex) husband, after he fails to consummate the marriage - Hrut is overly well-endowed, while Unna is "just average", or so she says at any rate.

My god, what a crazy world we live in !!!!

Afterwards, Unna manages to sue Hrut for reimbursement of the dowry, which is very handy because Unna is perennially short of cash.

The divorce and the subsequent litigation are now over, and Hrut is free to go and terrify other women with his "size", and Unna is free to marry a more "average" husband (Valgard) and have children, which she does (a son, called Mord).

A heartwarming story, with a happy ending and handshakes all around.

Unnas second wedding reception, this time with Valgard,

going much better than the first one, to put it mildly!

16:00 Lois and I relax with a cup of tea and listen a little to the radio, an interesting program about the Roman poet Horace (born 65 BC, died 8 BC). The host of the program is the charming Melvyn Bragg.

An interesting program where Melvyn, the program's host, discusses Horace with a bunch of academics. It is a bit of a shame that one of Horace's patrons, Octavian, changed his name midway through Horace's life when he became Augustus Caesar. And one of the academics in the program insists that they all refer to him as Octavian when the discussion concerns Horace's earlier life, but refer to him as Augustus, when talking about Horace's later life, which is a bit confusing to put it mildly!

Horace is the most popular Roman poet when it comes to quotability, that's for sure: among his biggest hits we find: - "carpe diem", "dulce et decorum est pro patria mori" and "nil desperandum" . Also......

Eheu fugaces, Postume, Postume,

labuntur anni nec pietas moram

rugis et instanti senectae

behaved indomitaeque morti ... etc etc

A translation: Alas, O Postumus, Postumus, the years gliding swiftly, nor will justice give pause to wrinkles, to advancing age, or Death invincible - (John Darbyshire)

Or as my former Latin teacher "Mick" Booker used to say:

"Eheu fugaces, Postume, Postume,

Oh for the years that are lost to me, lost to me! "  (Hilaire Beloc)

Ian Chadwick comments: for me, they are Horace's most touching lines, a bitter-sweet acceptance of mortality; inevitable age and death. Something that no one in his or her sixties can help thinking about;  and about which Horace wrote several times.

18:00 We have dinner and spend the rest of the evening watching television and listening to radio. An old episode of Top of the Pops is on, from September 1986.

I can see that the group Communards's Jimmy Somerville and Sarah Jane Morris had a lot of fun dancing around the stage with their number 1 hit "Don't Leave Me This Way". I suppose they will remember this moment for ever - maybe it was the best moment of their lives.

20:00 We turn off the television and listen a little to the radio, an interesting program all about "artisan" or "craft" alcoholic beverages, particularly beer and gin.

An interesting discussion, including comments by the charming Irishwoman Tina Warner-Keogh of the Warner-Edwards gin distillery in Northamptonshire. They apparently started the business 6 years ago with a mission to "save the world from mediocre gin". Let's all drink to that!

Earlier in the day, the postman delivered me a bottle of gin - a brand I have never tried before, but it was recommended by Steve, my American brother in law, who has a good understanding of high quality drinks, so I'm optimistic that it's going to taste really good.

21:00 We go to bed, a bit earlier than normal - zzzzzzzz !!!

Danish translation

09:00 Vi står op. Jeg får hoveddøren op for at hente de 6 1-pint mælkeflasker, som vores mælkemand har leveret, og jeg ser, at Bob, vores nabo, har lagt en død fasan ved siden af flaskerne – pokkers! Bob kan godt lide at jæge, og han giver os i gennemsnit 2-3 fasaner om året.

Jeg snakker lidt med Lois om fasanen. Det er en masse arbejde at forberede fasaner på at blive kogt, og hun er for tiden ikke ret frisk på idéen i betragtning af sine rygproblemer. Hun beslutter at lagre fasanen i en pose i spisekammeret i 1-2 dage. Og hun vil begrænse sig bare til at bruge brystet, for at spare arbejdet.  Vi vil ikke have, at fasanen ”døde forgæves” ha ha.

Vi ville hellere ikke have Bob til at give os fasaner, men i fortiden har vi altid takket ham for dem, og sagt hvor lækre de er, for ikke at såre ham. Problemet er, at han bare giver os flere af den – yikes!

Denne slags ting er lidt af en vanskelig situation, i sær for os briter. Der kan klassificeres nærmest som et af de tusindvis af ”meget britiske problemer” (copyright Channel 4), eller”ængstinducerede britiske problemer” (copyright Buzzfeed) .

 ikke at få helt fat i en eller andens navn, og...

... og det, at indse, at du aldrig kan tale med ham/hende mere igen.

Sikke et vanvid!!!

at underkaste sig til en vanskelig og usædvanlige befordring 

med bus og tog hellere end, det, at dele befordringen med en arbejdskollega

10:00 Lois’ rygsmerter virker meget værre i dag, og hun bevæger sig kun med besvær rundt omkring i huset. Men der er nogen forbedring i løbet af formiddagen – hun går sin sædvanlige tur rundt på den lokale fodboldbane, men hun beder mig om at ledsage hende for det tilfælde af, at yderligere problemer opstår. Stakkels Lois!!!!

Men solen skinner, og hun hygger sig med at lege touristguide, og udpeger de bedste brombær-hække, og de værste, også de gennemsnitlige, så jeg bliver opdateret i forberedelse på 2019, hvilket er rart.

Lois’ ryg, mine hofter: de er vores største svagheder, men vi er begge to fyldt 72 år dette år, det må vi indrømme. Og vi ved ikke, hvilke af vores kropsdele vil gå i stykke næst – det er juryen stadig ude om.  

Vi mindes om Bruce Lifschitz, en 45-årig lokal mand, der for nylig ramte verdens overskrifter, da han indrømmede til journalister, at han havde haft nogle overraskelser i dette område af sit liv (kilde: Onion News).

Mens han sagde, at han altid havde vidst, at "alt ville gå i stykke før eller senere", anerkendte ham  sin overraskelse, at hans krop var ved at bryde ned i en helt anden rækkefølge end, han forventede.

"Jeg har haft knæsmerter siden jeg var i 20'erne, så jeg troede ærligt, at de ville være de første til at give mig reelle problemer, men nej; min ryg svigtede mig helt ud af det blå, og nu kan jeg ikke bevæge mig mellem en siddende og stående stilling uden at ryggen blive betændt", sagde Lifschitz og tilføjede, at han også tidligere havde forudsagt, at han ville være totalt skaldet på dette punkt i sit liv, men han bemærkede med forbavselse, at hans igangværende hårtab var blevet overskredet af hans kroniske halsbrand og kraftigt stigende blodtryk.

"Jeg troede rækkefølgen ville være: knæ først, derefter hår, derefter prostata, og så måske syn og hukommelse derefter. Jeg havde ikke engang overvejet, at disse mavesår skulle spille ind. På dette tidspunkt kan jeg virkelig ikke sige, hvilken del af mig vil komme til at gå i stykker næst. " 

Lifschitz bemærkede, at for hvad det var værd, havde hans arme det godt og syntes ikke i fare for at gå itu når som helst snart, hvilket er rart at høre, det ved vi med sikkerhed!

Lois og jeg snakker lidt om Bruces problemer på vej hjem fra fodboldparken. Vi mindes om, at hans afsløringer forårsagede en sensation på det tidspunkt, men historien er siden da desværre faldt ud af overskrifterne, hvilket er helt typisk, kommenterer vi  - (”just saying” !!!) !!!!

11:00 Vi kommer hjem og slapper af med en kop kaffe i sofaen. Vi har besluttet ikke at tage vores uønskede elektriske apparater til Stoke Orchard-genbrugscentret i dag – det skal vi udskyde til næste uge. En 2-dages væddeløbsfestival starter i morgen, og der vil være en masse trafikpropper i området, det har vi ikke nogen tvivl om.

Jeg går ud i garagen for at anslå hvor mange uønskede apparater gemmer sig derinde.  Men det er det svært at være helt sikker på, fordi vores datter Sarah og hendes mand, Francis, efterlod bunkevis af deres uønskede gør-det-selv redskaber, biltilbehør, bilredskaber, børneudstyr osv i vores garage, da de for 3 år siden flyttede til Australien, og det er svært at se hvad er hvad, det må jeg nok sige!

Du godeste, sikke en vanvid!!!

Men jeg får et sus i maven, da jeg ser størrelsen af udfordringen. Jeg elsker en god udfordring! Jeg beslutter at prioritisere fjernelsen af børneudstyrret: børnevogne, bilsæder, højstole osv. Vi håber på, at visse velgørenhedsbutikker, vi kender i Bishops Cleeve, vil måske acceptere dem. Vi får se.

12:30 Vi spiser frokost og bagefter går jeg i seng og tager en gigantisk eftermiddagslur. Jeg står op kl 15.

Jeg går i gang med at læse endnu flere sider af Njals saga, der blev skrevet i Island i det 12. århundrede eller deromkring.

Unna, en pæn islandske pige, bliver skilt fra Hrut, sin (eks-) mand, efter det mislykkes ham at fuldbyrde ægetskabet – Hrut er overdrevent veludrustet, lader det til, mens Unna er ”bare gennemsnitlig”, eller det siger hun i hvert fald.

Du godeste, sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!!

Bagefter lykkes det Unna at sagsøge Hrut for tilbagebetalingen af medgiften, hvilket er meget praktisk, fordi Unna er konstant i bekneb for skillinger.

Skilsmissen og de efterfølgende retstrætter er nu slut, og det står Hrut frit for at forfærde andre kvinder, og det står Unna frit for at gifte sig med en mere ”gennemsnitlig” mand (Valgard) og få børn, hvilket hun gør (en søn, der hedder Mord).

En hjertevarmende historie, med en lykkelige slutning og håndtryk hele vejen rundt.

Unnas 2. bryllupsreception, denne gang med Valgard,

der gik meget bedre, end den første, for at sige mildt!

16:00 Lois og jeg slapper af med en kop te og lytter lidt til radio, et interessant program, der handler om den romerske digter, Horats ((født 65 f.Kr., død 8 f.Kr.). Programmets vært er den charmerende Melvyn Bragg.

Et interessant program, hvor Melvyn, programmets vært diskuterer  Horats med en flok akademiker. Det er lidt af en skam, at en af Horats patroner, Octavian, skiftede navn midtvejs igennem  Horats liv, da han blev kajseren Augustus. Og en af akademikerne i programmet insisterer på, at de alle refererer til ham som Octavian når diskussionen kredser om Horats tidligere liv, og Augustus, når det gælder om Horats senere liv, hvilket er lidt forvirrende, for at sige mildt!

Horats er de meste populære romerske digter, når det kommer til citationer, det er der ikke nogen tvivl om: blandt hans største hits finder vi:- ”carpe diem”, ”dulce et decorum est pro patria mori”, og ”nil desperandum”.

 Eheu fugaces, Postume, Postume,

labuntur anni nec pietas moram
rugis et instanti senectae
adferet indomitaeque morti…

En oversættelse: Alas, O Postumus, Postumus, the years glide swiftly by, nor will righteousness give pause to wrinkles, to advancing age, or Death invincible — (John Darbyshire)

Eller som min tidligere latin-lærer ”Mick” Booker, plejede at sige:

”Eheu fugaces, Postume, Postume,

Oh for the years that are lost to me, lost to me!” (Hilaire Beloc)

Ian Chadwick kommenterer: For mig er de hans mest rørende linjer, en bittersød accept af dødeligheden; uundgåelig alder og død. Noget, som ingen i hans eller hendes tresserne kan ikke lade være med at tænke på. Og om hvilket Horace skrev flere gange.

18:00 Vi spiser aftensmad og bruger resten af aftenen på at se lidt fjernsyn. De viser et gamle afsnit af Top of the Pops fra september 1986.

Jeg kan se at gruppen Communards Jimmy Somerville og Sarah Jane Morris hyggede sig meget med at danse rundt på scenen med deres nummer 1 hit ”Don’t Leave Me This Way”. Jeg formoder, at de vil huske dette øjeblik meget godt for evigt – måske var det deres livs bedste øjeblik, men det er jeg ikke helt sikker på. Det er juryen stadig ude om.

20:00 Vi slukker for fjernsynet og lytter lidt til radio, et interessant program, der handler om ”udsøgte”, ”håndværksmæssige” alkoholiske drikker, i sær øl og gin.

Et interessant diskussion, inklusive kommentarer fra Tina Warner-Keogh af Warner-Edwards gin-destilleriet i grevskabet Northamptonshire. De startede forretningen for 6 år siden med det formål ”redde verden fra middelmådig gin”. Lad os drikke til det!

Tidligere på dagen leverede postbudet en flaske gin – en mærke jeg aldrig har prøvet før, men det blev anbefalet af Steve, min amerikanske svigerbror, der har en god forstand på højkvalitetsdrikker, så jeg er optimisk om, at det kommer til at smage rigtig godt.

21:00 Vi går i seng, lidt tidligere, end normalt – zzzzzzzz!!!