Danskcolin: Tuesday November 3rd 2026 "I bet YOU feel tired today, don't you! I THOUGHT I caught you yawning just now!!!"

Yes, Friends, I think the whole of the UK is exhausted today after a busy Monday on top of a manic weekend! Am I right? Or am I right!!!!

And, as per usual, popular tabloid Onion News has caught the mood of the nation, to judge from its big lead stories this Tuesday morning!!!

And these stories, and the, like, billion others in the same vein - more, probably! - certainly bring a wink of recognition to the eyes of me and my wife Lois this morning, as we take our near-daily walk here in semi-pictorial Liphook, Hampshire, no doubt about that!!!

Yes, we too have caught the mood of the nation, and are feeling totally exhausted - no surprise there, with our busy schedule, despite having been retired for 20 years, which is mad! And even the trees around the 'hallowed turf' of local Hampshire Premier League heroes Liphook United, are trying to tell us, we feel, that they've simply "had enough" (!), and are busy shedding their leaves for winter, like this gorgeous semi-red, so-called "Northern European pin-oak" (quercus palustris).

Poor pin-oak haha!!!!!

Lois and I this morning, taking our near-daily walk over the "hallowed turf" of local

soccer heroes, Liphook United, stopping to gaze at the fallen leaves of a local

"pin oak", as identified by my phone's handy "plantnet" app, which is illuminating!!!!

Yes, all over the UK today, trees are shedding their leaves for winter.

And not only that but the nation's stable-boys, exhausted or not (!), are all shedding their bodices, to judge by today's Onion News - see headlines above!

Disappointingly for Lois, however, this year's reimagining of the late Jilly Cooper's classic stable-boy-bodice-ripper "The Rivals" is on a pay-channel this year, a channel that we're both too "tight" to fork out the money for, so no joy there!

Only joking, of course, about Lois being "disappointed"! Me taking my scarf and overcoat off is enough stimulation for both of us, and more than enough physical exercise - well, we are 80, you know, although we look much younger, of course !!! [I'd like signed witness statements before I let you repeat that old 'chestnut', Colin, no pun intended! - Ed]

But only joking (again, again!!!!), However, certainly, like the rest of the UK, we ARE totally exhausted, and "yawning our heads off" today, and you'll know why, because probably, like us, didn't YOU have a busy Saturday getting ready for the trick-or-treaters, then, a busy Sunday preparing to host a dinner for YOUR close relatives, followed by YOUR Monday fortnightly Latin class????

Am I right? Or am I right!!!!

[No, no, and no! - Ed]

flashback to our busy 'long weekend' of frenzy : Friday getting ready for over a 100

trick-or-treaters, would you believe - the young scamps!!!..... followed by Sunday

hosting a meal for our daughter Alison and family, followed by preparation

for our taxing Monday morning Latin class. What madness !!!!

No wonder our neighbours have dubbed Lois and me "possibly Liphook's busiest-looking couple" (!) - it's been total mayhem, and "in spades" !!!!!

Certainly, totally exhausted this Tuesday morning, we don't manage much at all today, other than our near-daily walk and an afternoon in bed for "statutory nap-time", to put it mildly!!! [So what's new, Colin! - Ed]

We also somehow find the time to finish booking our theatre tickets for next Monday's production of two plays written by my baby sister Gill, to be performed at one of London's top "fringe theatres", which will be nice! The plays will be performed by the female-led troupe Yellow Coat Theatre Company - slogan "Of course I'm hot...I'm 50!".

(left) Yellow Coat - the theatre company putting on the plays, and (right)

my "baby-sister" Gill (68!), with two members of the company

The tickets turn out to be a "snip" at only £10.50 a head, for each play, plus a £5 voluntary donation, which isn't bad, considering it's London! Here's the receipt for one of the plays, if you need proof! And maybe we'll see you there!

However, people in Hungary aren't so lucky with the price of their "cultural evenings", however, as I find out today in an email from my Hungarian friend, Tunde. Seats at Budapest's prestigious Operahaz Theatre can cost up to (almost!) a whopping £200 a piece, or 60,000 forints, according to today's article in the Hungarian online magazine "Femina".

Lois and I visited Hungary several times in the 1990's and 2000's, when I was learning the language, and we know that these crazy prices are going to be a blow to the many Hungarians, for whom a visit to the theatre to see the "Nutcracker" ballet is a deeply cherished holiday tradition.

flashback to 1998: preparing for our last night in our rented

room in Budapest on one of our many visits to the city

You may have heard the Hungarian proverb, "Christmas just ain't Christmas without the Nutcracker!".

No?

But "Colin, who can afford to pay up to £200 a head for a ticket?", I hear you cry!

Well, here's the story in "Femina" this morning, in which the Opera House director puts up a spirited defence of his ticket-pricing strategy, citing the costs of putting on a world-class production these days.

However, Tunde, my penfriend, laments, in her email, how it used to be ridiculously cheap to go to the opera or the ballet, even in the capital, Budapest, and Lois and I remember, during our many visits to the city, paying prices like £5 a head, or even less, to see prestigious productions there.

flashback to 2002: (left) Lois (then 56) with Tunde, our Hungarian penfriend, when we visited

her Budapest flat, and (right) the lovely Union Jack cake she baked in our honour

But what a truly crazy world we live in !!!!

21:00 And, for Lois and me, there's even more madness on TV tonight, as we find out from the first programme in the welcome pre-winter return of "QI" - the knowledge-based comedy quiz on BBC2, chaired by the UK's favourite Dane, Sandi Toksvig.

So... here's a question for you! Where do most of the microplastics in our bodies come from?

A lot of people think it's from our food, especially seafood, because of all the plastic rubbish in the oceans, that wind up inside the world's fish population.

But no! Some of them do come from our fish-meals, as Sandi explains, but this is not the majority source, as Sandi explains. Many many more come from random things in our houses and from the things we wear. And we breathe all this stuff in, which is weird!

And, while sea-food is an obvious source for scientists to test, there are actually no more microplastics in fish than there are in other foods, such as salt, chicken, honey etc - you name it!

Panellist and TV presenter Gyles Brandreth wants to know if eating plastic is bad for us, which is a fair enough question to ask!

And, apparently, according to Sandi, some people are beginning to think that the fear of ingesting microplastics has been overblown, and that we should worry less about it. It is now everywhere, it's in human blood, it's in brains.

It's even in sperm, would you believe, which is weird, but panellist and London-based US comedienne Desiree Burch, "her in the big yellow dress" (!), puts a positive spin on this little-known fact for Sandi, which is a nice touch!