Tuesday November 30th 2021

10:30 Yikes! - Lois is in the front room putting away some crockery and cutlery, when she sees my new-found cousin David and his wife Zanne driving onto our forecourt, before driving off again, and then driving back again. What madness! They've arrived half an hour early but luckily we're all ready for them, so no problem there - they found the journey from their home in North Oxfordshire less congested than they expected, which is nice to hear.

a cartoonist's impression of the scene on our sofa this morning -

(left to right) me, Zanne and David.

My sister Gill thinks that David and I look alike and have the same voice, but Lois isn't so sure, so the jury's still out on that one.

David is a BBC online journalist, adopted as a baby in 1959, whom I discovered to be a cousin as the result of a DNA test. He retired recently but had previously been working on the BBC News website, which by coincidence is my own principal source of news, because it isn't sensationalist like so much of the online news media today, and they don't use words like "chaos", "fury", "disbelief" etc unless they are truly warranted. David has also in previous years worked on his local daily newspaper the  Oxford Mail.

A scene during the night-shift at BBC Television Centre, Bush House, 

a picture which online journalist David took a few years ago

Zanne is into language teaching, and a few years ago David took a career break from the BBC and the couple moved, together with their 3 children, out to the Mediterranean island of Majorca for a spell, so that Zanne could boost her own career teaching EFL (English as a foreign language). As a result their 3 children are now reasonably fluent in Mallorquin, the dialect of Catalan spoken in the Balearic Islands.

Time for a coffee and some scones. And the four of us, Lois included, sit and chat for 2 and a half hours, scarcely stopping to draw breath. Lois and I have a lot in common with them, that's for sure. 

And we also discover a number of coincidences between our lives: Zanne studied at Lancaster University, just like our daughter Sarah. David lived in the Kingsbury area of North West London as a boy, just like me and my late siblings Kathy and Steve. And so it goes on. Zanne also has ancestors who lived in the tiny village of Cumnor near Oxford, as has Lois. 

What a crazy world we live in !!!!

Zanne knows well the area of Cheltenham we live in now - she recognised our neighbourhood as soon as she and David drove into the area this morning, because she once had an aunt who lived about half a mile away, whom she frequently visited as a child. And as we found out last month, in the early 1970's when Lois and I first moved to Cheltenham, David's father Peter was living about a mile away from us near the Old Bath Road.

And so it goes on. It's a small world - no doubt about that!

13:00 We say goodbye to David and Zanne, but we feel totally drained. We're no longer used to long chats, since the pandemic and lockdowns began. We have lunch and then Lois has a walk round the local football field, while I put the recycling boxes out on the kerbside for collection early tomorrow morning. When she comes back we go to bed for a nap - we're tired all right: no doubt about that. My god!

a tired Lois takes a walk around the local football field

16:00 We roll out of bed. My god - what have all the lockdowns done to us haha!

19:00 Lois disappears into the dining-room to take part in her Great-niece Molly's yoga class on zoom. I settle down on the couch and watch an old episode of the 1990's sitcom "One Foot In The Grave", about irascible retiree Victor Meldrew and his long-suffering wife, Margaret.

In this week's rerun episode, Victor and Margaret are visiting their god-daughter Jennifer, who's just about to go on holiday. Jennifer has asked the couple to look after her pet tortoise Kylie while she's away.

I enjoy this episode because it features the first appearance in the series of one of my favourite characters in the sitcom, Jennifer's Auntie Norma, a shy woman who lives with Jennifer and her young daughter.

Victor and Margaret are sitting with Jennifer in Jennifer's living-room when Norma appears behind a door with frosted panes of glass. 

a specially enhanced close-up of a corner of our TV screen reveals 

the ultra-shy Auntie Norma, watching proceedings through a frosted glass door

 in the top right-hand corner of the screen

Apparently the shy Norma feels safer being on the other side of the door, and she doesn't realise that Jennifer's guests can see her. I must try that myself some time!

Admittedly there's always a  slight air of menace about Norma on the other side of the door. Will she suddenly go berserk and come rushing into the room with an axe in her hand? Hopefully not, at any rate!

19:30 Lois emerges from her zoom yoga session, and, as her sect's weekly Tuesday Bible Seminar is taking a break this week, we both settle down on the couch to watch a bit of TV, one of the Two Ronnies (Ronnie Barker and Ronnie Corbett) comedy specials.

Who knew that when the Two Ronnies retired from their TV work in the UK, they spent a year or two down under in Australia producing more of their shows? 

It's pretty much the familiar "Two Ronnies" territory as usual, although there are a few local references thrown into the scripts. For instance who or what is "Rooty Hill", two words that send the local Australian studio audience into paroxysms of laughter every time they hear them? 

I don't know, but I think we should be told. And quickly!

This sketch features the two Ronnies as old codgers sitting with their newspapers in their London club, discussing Corbett's sister.

Tremendous fun !!!!!!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!

Monday December 29th 2021

Today would have been my late sister Kathy's 74th birthday - she died in 2013, in Norristown, Pennsylvania USA.

Lois and I, and our 2 young daughters, had already been living in Columbia Maryland for a few months, before Kathy came out from England to join us in the spring of 1983. Initially she lived with us in our house there, which was a great thrill to all of us, and especially to little Alison (8) and Sarah (6), who were incredibly excited to have their Aunt Kathy living with us. 

These are a couple of pictures from the first time we took her out and about - there was a spring or early summer fair going on by one of the local lakes, where there were horse rides and other games for young children laid on. 

flashback to spring 1983: sitting by one of the lakes in Columbia Md -

(left to right) me, Kathy, Alison and Sarah

Kathy took this picture of Lois and me and our 2 daughters

It was an overcast day but quite warm, I remember. Kathy quickly got to love the life over there, taking a job at the British Embassy, working for the science and technology guy. Later that year she met Steve, her future husband, and they married 2 years later.

Happy days !!!!!

10:00 Lois and I spend the day cleaning, tidying and vacuuming our house in preparation for tomorrow's visit by my new-found cousin, David, the BBC online journalist - identified as my cousin by a DNA test. David's wife Zanne is also coming. 

We're very much looking forward to meeting them. And although I've unearthed various papers and old photos to help him with his search to know more about his "real" family, Lois and I have decided not to overwhelm him with these, but to aim first and foremost at getting to know them. 

David was adopted as a baby. However I've got about 7 or 8 pictures of David's biological mother, my Auntie Joan, which I can show him. Joan is buried in the same grave as my mother, in a cemetery in Oxford. Our maternal grandparents, Sidney and Gladys are also buried there.

flashback to a couple of months ago: David, Zanne and their daughter

visit the grave where my mother, his mother, and our maternal

grandparents are buried, in a cemetery in Oxford

As David is a journalist, I plan to just say a little about David's (and my) great-grandfather John, who was editor of a local newspaper in Glamorgan, South Wales in the closing years of the 19th century. 

I can also say something about John's son, David's (and my) great-uncle Willy, who emigrated to Natal, South Africa, in the late 1890's, with his wife Alice and son Jack.

flashback to the early 1890's: my Great-Uncle Willy and his wife Alice,

their son Jack and (?) servants, outside their house in Maritzburg, Natal

Willy went to work as a journalist for various newspapers out there, including the Pretoria News and the Cape Argus, both of which are still in publication today.

the Pretoria News and the Cape Argus, which my Great-uncle Willy worked for,

are both still in publication  today, which is nice!

20:00 We're both pretty tired, but fortunately Lois's sect's usual Monday Evening Bible Seminar is taking a break this week, so we both settle down on the couch and watch one of our favourite TV quizzes, "Only Connect", which tests lateral thinking.

Tonight, for example, the teams are challenged to spot the connection between these 4 items:

Who knew that the middle syllable of "Nevada" is pronounced with a short "a" in Nevada itself? And who knew that Houston Street in New York is pronounced locally as "House-ton" Street? And who knew that in Northern Ireland, "broadly speaking", the letter H is pronounced as "aitch" by Protestants and "haitch" by Catholics? [I expect a lot of people knew that! - Ed]

Lois and I think the fourth item, "fish and chips",  is a bit weak, however - it's just two different local accents, and nothing else. Wake up, question-setters!

And who knew that these types of issues are called "shibboleths"? Well, Lois did. 

In the Book of Judges in the Bible, the Ephraimites and Gileadites pronounced the word "shibboleth" differently. either "sibboleth" or "shibboleth". And in those times revealing your pronunciation could get you into danger because it would reveal immediately where you came from.

What a crazy world they lived in, in those times!!!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzz!!!!

Sunday November 28th 2021

08:00 I get out of bed, go downstairs and bring back 2 cups of tea for Lois and me. 

No sign of the mouse in the larder again this morning. Ever since I arranged a visit from the Borough Council's "mouse inspector" who'll be coming next Thursday, the mouse hasn't deigned to put in a single appearance.

That little bastard!!!!  It's obviously playing an elaborate game of mouse-and-householder with us!

a typical "mouse inspector" working for the Borough Council

09:00 Lois has had a bad night, with a bit of a disturbed tummy, so I offer to do us both a breakfast of boiled egg with toast and marmalade, to calm her system down. It's nice to eat breakfast together, which has become a rare event. Usually I get my own cereal while Lois reads in bed - she tends to come down up to an hour after me.

10:45 Lois disappears into the dining-room to take part on zoom in the first of her sect's two "meetings" scheduled for today, as for every Sunday.

Meanwhile I look through our family history boxes. We're getting a visit on Tuesday from my "new" cousin, David, a BBC online journalist, and his wife Zanne. I discovered that he and I were cousins after my sister Gill was given a DNA testing kit as a birthday present in May. 

David was the illegitimate son of mine and Gill's Aunty Joan, and he was adopted as a baby. He has led all his life in ignorance of his "real" family, and he's now in his 60's. 

In the last couple of months he has met Gill and a couple of our cousins in person, and Lois and I are very much looking forward to meeting him ourselves on Tuesday.

David (1959) (left) with my cousin John (1950)

David (centre) with my cousins Jonathan (1959) and Kate (1947)

David and Zanne with my sister Gill (1958)

As David is a BBC online journalist, Lois and I are guessing that he'll be interested to hear more about his (and my) maternal grandfather John, born 1845, who for a short time in his late 40's became editor of a local newspaper "The Chronicle" in Bridgend, South Wales, until his death in 1895. 

At least one of John's sons, Willy, born 1868, also became a news reporter. He and his wife Alice moved to South Africa in 1898 or thereabouts, and Willy got a job on a local paper in the township of Ladysmith. The township was in the British colony of Natal, close to the border of the Boer territory of the Orange Free State.

the British township of Ladysmith, Natal, on the border with

the Boer territory of the Orange Free State

Sadly, the town was besieged for some months by the Boers in the Boer War 1899-1902. Willy suffered severe health problems as a result of deprivations caused by the siege, problems from which he never really recovered. He died in 1904, and is buried at Pretoria, South Africa's capital. After his death his wife Alice and two children Jack and Natalie returned to England, but I haven't been able to discover what became of them.

This morning I have finally managed to locate a copy of a great picture of newspaper editor John and all his children, a photo I can show to David on Tuesday. Now I just have to find the original, which will hopefully be less grainy - oh dear!

flashback to the 1870's or thereabouts: John and wife Elizabeth and their 8 children

Willy is at the back on the right, and my grandfather Sidney

is seated on the rug at the front on the left.

Plus I found a great picture of Willy, his wife Alice and son Jack and "house boy", after they moved to South Africa. Were they also employing an adult servant? If so, what a servant - my god! Dig that turban!

Flashback to the 1890's: My great-uncle Willy and his family and servants(?) 

in Maritzburg, Natal, South Africa, now Pietermaritzburg

What a crazy world they lived in in those days!

12:30 Lunch and then up to bed for a nap. Then we get going on our various late afternoon activities. Lois watches a couple of Christmas TV movies on Channel 5. The first one stars Doris Roberts, the interfering mother-in-law in Everybody Loves Raymond, as guardian angel "Mrs Miracle", which is nice.

Meanwhile I am tearing my hair out trying to put together two 2022 calendars from our 2021 photo collection, the first one for our daughter Sarah and family in Perth, Australia, and the second one for Lois's cousin Stephen in Adelaide, Australia. I find that the photo-calendar software objects to photos taken off social media unless I make them smaller, and also it refuses to recognise photos with a so-called .jfe .jef (??or something like that) suffix.

What madness !!!!!

19:30 We speak on the phone to our elder daughter Alison, who lives in Headley, Hampshire, with husband Ed and their 3 children, Josie (15), Rosalind (13) and Isaac (11). Ed is a lawyer working for Scottish railway companies, and he'll be jetting off to Scotland for a couple of days this week.

Next weekend the whole family are travelling to Wembley Stadium, London, to watch the Women's Soccer Cup Final between Chelsea and Arsenal, which will be exciting for them. Lois and I make a mental note to watch the match on TV.

flashback to December 2019: the family at Wembley watching a 

women's soccer match: (left to right) Josie, Alison, Rosalind,

Isaac and Ed

20:30 We watch a bit of TV, an interesting retrospective on the comedy writer and performer Victoria Wood, known for her stand-up comedy shows and her sitcom Dinnerladies, set in the canteen of a factory in the Manchester area.

Victoria was a writer and performer who avoided parties and social events, and who used to polish her scripts to the nth degree, even altering them after the so-called "final rehearsal" - my god! My kind of scriptwriter!

Her sitcom "Dinnerladies" was set in a factory canteen in the north of England, where her own character, Brenda, was visited from time to time by her lecherous mother, Petula, who was played by Victoria's great friend, the actress Julie Walters. And it's been noted that Victoria often gave Julie some of the best lines.

In this scene the kitchen staff including Victoria's character Brenda (left) are gathered for a tea-break, when Brenda's lecherous mum Petula (centre) makes one of her flying visits, accompanied by her "toyboy", Brad, who's standing behind her.

Tremendous fun !!!!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!