07:00 Yikes, another early start for Lois and me - we booked an online grocery delivery yesterday and the only halfway "civilised" slot we could get for today was 7:30 to 8:30 am. The alternative would have been even worse - 7am to 8am. What a crazy world we live in!
Then we remember we ordered from Ocado, so we can afford to spend another 10 minutes in bed.
And later, incredibly, we even read about our story in tomorrow's local Onion News, which is amazing, although obviously today turned out later to be a "slow news day" for them.
Our bedroom is definitely being "bugged" - we're pretty sure about that now, because our conversation is repeated verbatim in their front page lead article, even though they obviously don't have a camera in here, because the couple in the picture definitely isn't us, as I think you can probably tell!
Do YOU know about Ocado? They bring your groceries already bagged, so they can just "dump" the bags in your hallway - you just return the bags to them next time and get 10p each for them. By contrast, Morrisons, for example, make you take your groceries out of their crates and put them into
bags, so it's much more of a malarkey, and you have to get all your bags ready in the hallway before they arrive.
a typical Morrisons groceries delivery - and of course
it'll be the customer's job now to transfer all the stuff
from the Morrisons' crates into their own bags - what madness !!!!
Ocado is also good for introverts like Lois and me, simply because you don't have to stand and chat with the delivery guy for 5 minutes, while you scramble to transfer the groceries from the crates into the bags etc.
So it's a win-win, which is nice!
a typical Ocado delivery guy, taking out the already bagged groceries
and delivering them to the welcoming arms of this pretty housewife.
It's not exactly rocket science is it haha !!!!
Life is made for extroverts - do YOU ever feel that? I remember one of the traumas of my youth was the fear that I would suddenly be called on to become a member of a "posse" - you know, when the local "reeve" or "sheriff" (shire reeve) would ring your doorbell and make you join him in freeing your town from the grip of a gang of hardened criminals?
flashback to Victorian times: an elderly gentleman
is persuaded to join a posse, albeit reluctantly, it seems!
I remember my relief in 1967, when Parliament passed the Criminal Justice Act, superseding the previous notorious "Section 8" of the Sheriffs Act of 1887, thereby putting an end to the "posse" system, after almost exactly1000 years of rigorous enforcement: the procedure dates from the time of Alfred the Great, or even earlier by local custom, although not codified until Alfred's reign.
The Sheriffs Act states that, "Every person in a county shall be ready and apparelled at the command of the sheriff, and at the cry of the country [????? - Ed] to arrest a felon whether within a franchise or without, and in default shall on conviction be liable to a fine, and if default be found in the lord of the franchise he shall forfeit the franchise to the Queen, and if in the bailiff he shall be liable besides the fine to imprisonment for not more than one year, or if he have not whereof to pay the fine, then two years."
This permitted the sheriff of each county to call every civilian to his assistance to catch a person who had committed a felony– that is, a serious crime. And it provided for fines for those who did not comply.
That was the crazy system that thankfully ended in 1967, when Lois and I were both 22.
start of the Criminal Justice Act of 1967
Americans are not so lucky, I believe. I think the posse system still holds over there, which is a nuisance not just generally, but also - and I think this aspect is often overlooked - a nuisance for introverted law-enforcement officers, or just for ordinary introverted guys, wanting to put to put a stop to this or that criminal malarkey in their local area.
Poor Cassidy !!!!!!!
a typical Louis L'Amour novel: included for information purposes only
[What's the rest of your blog for, then, Colin?! - Ed]
Incidentally, if you're a guy looking for a wife or girl-friend, to be seen reading a Louis L'Amour novel is definitely a big "turn-on" for "the ladies". Did you see this recent post on TikTok?
The face says it all, doesn't it. Need I say more, haha !!!!
09:00 After we put all our Ocado groceries away, Lois and I drive over to our local pharmacy to pick up our respective prescriptions for statins, to combat our slightly raised cholesterol levels.
Don't tell the NHS but, as always, we have been doing some "jiggery-pokery" with our respective tablets. Lois sometimes forgets to take hers, so when I run out, after 8 weeks, I borrow some of hers, so that we can continue to be "in sync" when it comes to getting our fresh batches, which saves having to make two separate trips to the pharmacy - makes sense to us haha!!!
As you'll remember, after 51 years of marriage, we achieved our first ever "simultaneous renewal of pill supply" back in December, a cause for much celebration.
In our enthusiasm, we wanted to join in the celebrations of these local flatmates who had synched their periods just 8 months ago, but they said "no", so we had to let that one slide. I suppose we were just too old for them, which was a pity!
After picking up our statins, we enjoy our own bi-monthly celebration with a visit to the local Poolbrook Kitchen and Coffee shop for 2 large hot-chocolates and a cake - chocolate and orange for Lois and a so-called "Tiffan" (whatever that is) for me.
The above pictures only show part of my "tiffan" by the way - by the time I get my phone out to take a picture, I've scoffed most of it. And I think that "tiffan" is probably a misprint for "tiffin" - but let me know if I've got it wrong - it won't be for the first time, to put it mildly !!!!
It's expensive, like everything else these days, but what can you do? And in our enthusiasm we forget to use our "loyalty cards", which is a pity.
Just saying, haha !!!!!
11:00 Lois and I arrive home, and I do a bit more work on my so-called presentation on zoom to the local U3A History of English group. I have to give the presentation on Friday week (February 16th), and it's supposed to be all about changes in the English language since the mid-18th century, i.e. 1750 or thereabouts.
Yikes - I've only got about 9 days now, to put it all together. YIKES (again) !!!!!
a typical zoom meeting of the group, seen here in happier times
last year, seconds before former group-leader Lynda (bottom right)
made her shock resignation speech, leaving me (middle right)
to pick up the pieces
So far I've been mostly working just on the title of my presentation, and my draft title so far is "If King George III (reigned 1760-1820) came back to life right now, would we, and he, understand each other?"
My conclusion: We would understand him, but he wouldn't understand us, a lot of it due to vocabulary changes resulting from technical and scientific advances. Another factor is the spread of fashionable but relatively short-lived "buzz words and phrases", copied around the Anglophone world because of modern communications: computers, movies, all that malarkey.
If you don't believe me, imagine us talking to people from the 23rd century - their grammar might be similar to ours, but we wouldn't understand all the technical mumbo-jumbo, and the new slang of their crazy world. It all makes sense somehow, doesn't it!
a typical person from the 23rd century,
communicating by thought waves and all that malarkey
Going back to the past, however, grammatical changes since George III's time have been pretty superficial. It's true that there have been lots of minor pronunciation changes, but as speakers of the English language we're already exposed to a lot of different forms of English daily on TV and film etc and I don't think we'd have much problem understanding King George - he'd sound a bit quaint, partly countrified and partly American, but easily understandable - that's my conclusion.
I've discovered from my studies so far, for instance, that in 18th century England, some words were pronounced routinely with what we now think of as the US pronunciation, words like: mobile, hostile etc; leisure; launch, jaundice, laundry etc: secretary, dormitory etc; little, Protestant, deputy etc; towards.
Another big feature from the 18th century was the dropping of 'g' in the '-ing' ending of present participles.
In words starting with 'h' the 'h' was not always pronounced, particularly if the first syllable didn't carry the stress, e.g, in words like "however".
There are lots of little differences from today: "sauce" was pronounced "sass", for instance - hence the adjective "sassy" alongside "saucy".
Loads of other letters were "silent": (w)oman, Ed(w)ard, up(w)ard - all with silent 'w's. And respec(t), stric(t) - the dropping of the 't' in words like these is a habit which only survives today in the pronunciation of "Christmas" .
Se(v)enty, pa(v)ement, husban(d), Lon(d)on, all had dropped letters too.
However, as soon as universal education came in with the 1870 Education Act, people starting learning the "proper" spellings of words, and they decided to put all these "silent" letters back into their speech. And Samuel Johnson's pioneering dictionary was another incentive to standardise.
the introduction of compulsory schooling for all,
laid out in the Education Acts of the 1870's
That was all in the future, however, when Irish author and Anglican cleric, Laurence Sterne (1713-1768), published his "Sentimental Journey".
And to illustrate some of the differences in pronunciation between then and now, here's a bit of Sterne's text, and underneath each line is a phonetic transcription of how Sterne would probably himself have pronounced his own words in the common educated parlance of the time, as postulated by Barbara Strang in her book "A History of English" (1970):
You can see, for instance:
Line 1: Sterne would have pronounced "him" as "'im", dropping the 'h'.
Line 2: "My", as in "my mind", would have been pronounced as "me", ie "me mind". And "advancing" would have been pronounced as " advancin' ", dropping the final 'g'. The 'w' would have dropped out of 'towards'; "little" would have been pronounced "liddle", to rhyme with griddle or fiddle.
Line 3: "he" would be said as " 'ee ", dropping the initial 'h'.
Line 4: "however" would also drop the initial 'h', etc etc.
Irish novelist and Anglican cleric Laurence Sterne (1713-1768)
I don't know my fellow group members will think of my so-called "talk" - which I haven't written yet., incidentally.
However, my clever idea at the moment is to try to "involve" the other members of the group, so that they don't fall asleep during my so-called "talk". They're such lazy slobs haha!
And here's the thing - this is my big idea. I'm going to ask them to tell me some examples of things they don't like about the current words and expressions that people use, or the pronunciations that we hear nowadays.
Top of mine and Lois's list is the way people nowadays start their explanations with "so...." instead of "well...", while they're thinking out what they're going to say.
Let me know your pet-hates about the way people speak today, won't you!!!! On a postcard, or by email, or in the comments section. And don't be "mealy-mouthed" about it. Don't stint yourselves! Just let rip haha!!! Let them have it haha !!!!
16:00 Meanwhile other big news on the housing front has come in the last day or two.
Our daughter Sarah and family, newly returned to the UK after 7 years in Australia have been trying to buy a house here. Yesterday they received the shock news that the law firm of solicitors acting for them in the house-purchase have suddenly "gone out of business" - what madness!
What are the chances of that happening, eh? People in the legal profession don't go out of business, they just get richer and richer normally, don't they haha? The good news is that Sarah seems to be getting on well talking to the alternative firm of solicitors who will be taking over the arrangements for their house-purchase, which is good news.
flashback to May 2023: our daughter Sarah and
family move back to the UK after their 7 years in Australia
In more positive housing news, my recently widowed younger sister Jill has had her offer accepted on a flat in the town of Ipswich, where one of her 3 daughters, Lucy, also lives. It won't be easy for Jill downsizing from the spacious family house that she and Peter lived in together over the past 30 years. Lois and I went through similar traumas in 2022.
Ipswich, in the county of Suffolk, on England's North Sea coast
And do you know, I didn't realise till today that back in the 18th century, the town of Ipswich was pronounced "Ipsich", in those far-off crazy times. What a madness it all was!!!!
[I'm sure it will make Jill's day to have that information, Colin haha! - Ed]
flashback to October: muffled up in our winter coats,
Lois and I take my sister Jill (centre) for a walk on the common
OCtober 2023: Jill, Lois and I stop for a warming cup of
coffee at the café outside the town museum here in Malvern
22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzz!!!!!
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