Yes, Friends, do YOU pet strangers' dogs when you're "going about your business"?
Lots of us do, don't we! But it can be risky, as the lead story in today's Onion News makes clear, and in spades!!!!
And reading Bane's "profile" as a somewhat "bitey" dog this morning, brings a shudder of a smile to the faces of me and my wife Lois, here in park-heavy Liphook, Hampshire - no question about that!
me and my wife Lois - a recent picture
Let me put my cards on the table at this point!
[I wish you wouldn't keep doing that, Colin! - Ed]
Lois and I are not really dog-lovers, we're more cat-people. However in the course of our long, and distinguished, married life of 54 years next month (would you believe!) we've managed to 'spawn' two daughters who grew up to marry dog-lovers, so over the last couple of decades, we've had to make some accommodations in respect of hobnobbing with dogs, to put it mildly!
flashback to August 1972: Lois and me, at the start of
our long and distinguished married life together
What madness, isn't it! And, just to rub it in, last night Lois and I got a nightmare call from our elder daughter Alison, who's reaching the end a 2-week holiday in Mallorca in the Spanish Balearic Islands with husband Edward and their 3 teenage kids. Alison wants us to go over, bright and early this morning, to the family's house in nearby Churt today, just over the county line in Surrey, to 'see to' their 2 pet dogs, Sika and Bjorn, and to stop them biting a plumber who's going to be arriving at the house at 9am today.
our daughter Alison, with lawyer-husband Edward and their 3 teenage kids,
currently on holiday in Mallorca, in the Spanish Balearic Islands
Alison and Edward's two Dutch dog-sitters have reported water dripping through the ceiling of the family's kitchen, and a local plumber, Phil, is due to arrive there at 9am this morning, and the family's two dogs are bound to take exception to him, Alison tells us. What madness (again) !!!!
To cover this sudden, unexpected, family emergency, Lois and I, one of Liphook's busiest retired couples (!), nevertheless decide to spend the morning at Alison's house, letting the plumber in at 9 o'clock, and then protecting him from the family's two pet dogs, and generally "trying to look busy", if only for the sake of our reputation locally (!).
us, at our daughter Alison's house in Churt, Surrey, this morning, keeping the
family's two dogs from biting a plumber, having a scratch lunch, before
going home for another richly-deserved afternoon in bed
[You don't look very busy to me, Colin - just saying! - Ed]
Now, comfortably retired for 20 years, Lois and I are once again wondering, for the umpteenth time, "How did we ever find the time to go to work, back in the day?" !!!!
Alison and family are due to be flying into London's Heathrow Airport this afternoon, at the end of their Spanish holiday, and that's when the fur is going to start flying - that's for sure!
the route that our daughter Alison and family will be taking this afternoon
at the end of their 2-week holiday in Mallorca, in the Balearic Islands
Talking to local plumber Phil this morning, Lois and I establish that water had been coming out of the bathroom shower, through the kitchen ceiling below and on to the kitchen table - Lois and I had noticed drops of water on the table before Phil the Plumber arrived, at 9 o'clock.
But who will pay for the damage? Will it be Alison and Edward, who are just renting the house temporarily while their real house is being extensively renovated? Or will it be their absentee Swedish landlord? Phil the Plumber says that the shower cubicle is faulty with an ill-fitting door that would easily allow water to escape onto the bathroom floor, and potentially through the ceiling down to the table in the kitchen.
a typical, incorrectly-installed shower door
Or, alternatively, were the Dutch dog-sitting couple to blame by irresponsibly directing the shower-head towards the door? Phil had noticed that it was angled that way - for what purpose, we don't know, because the dog-sitting couple have already flown back to Holland, which is a pity!
Your views welcome, however, especially if you've got a law degree in an Anglosphere country, or in Holland, or Sweden, even - but postcards only, needless to say !!!!!!
new lawyers graduating in (top left) UK, (top right) Canada,
(bottom left) Holland, and (bottom right) Sweden
[Is that all you two 'noggins' have done today, Colin - sat around in your daughter's garden, had a hasty lunch with elements bought at the local Spar, and then gone home for another afternoon in bed? - Ed]
Well, absolutely not, seeing as how you're interested!
Known locally as Liphook's busiest retired couple, Lois and I also somehow found time today to read a bit of Lois's copy of "The Week", which gives a digest of the past week's events at home and abroad, and keep up with trends generally - and there's a real "doozy" of a trend featured today - turn to page 94 in YOUR copy haha!
It's an all-purpose "bag" and needs a real "woman grip" or a superhuman-grade "everything claw", just to lug it around! I'm not sure what she puts in it, but I can let you know if you're interested haha!!!
(left) me showcasing Lois's "everything bag", and (right) Lois, seen
sporting the bag during the recent visit of our daughter Sarah
and family, who flew in from Perth, Australia for a 3-week break with us
Me?
I'm an "old school", strictly "pockets" kind of a guy, an invention which I find indispensable as a "no fuss" way of carrying around my hanky, comb, coins, wallet and phone.
But what's in YOUR pockets, if you're a pocket-person, may I ask! And if a bag is "your bag" (no pun intended!), how big is your bag, and what exactly is in it? Or, if you're a Gen Z "girlie", what's in YOUR "girl grip" or "everything claw"?
Your answers welcome (again)! Just put them on your postcard with your legal "take" on the "shower leak" controversy, if you can squeeze them in, that is haha!!!!
Will this do?
[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]
22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzz!!!!!!
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