Thursday, 2 May 2019

Wednesday, May 01 2019


10:00 Lois goes out into the backyard and starts to weed a little between the fruit bushes, but I stay indoors and sit down with the computer. I am very aware that I must not exercise physically too much this morning because I have a 2-hour meeting this afternoon: Scilla's U3A Old Norse group is meeting up at the bar of the town’s Everyman Theatre, and I always feel completely washed up after one of Scilla's meetings - they are so intense – my god!

I have already got myself ready for Scilla's meeting - I have read, and translated into English, chapters 41-44 of Njal's saga, and I don’t expect that we’ll have time to read more than chapters 41-43 this afternoon, so I feel that I am in good shape for Scilla.

I decide therefore to leaf through a few pages of the Knight's Tale, one of Chaucer's Canterbury Tales, because Lynda's U3A "Making of English" group is holding its monthly meeting on Friday, also at the theatre bar - yikes, busy busy busy.

flashback to the 14th century when the Knight's tale first hit
the headlines - two prisoners fall in love with the same girl.
And  unfortunately she’s Princess Emily, the sister-in-law of their jailer. 
I foresee lots of problems ahead with story-line.
Who will get the girl (if anyone) ? Tune in next week ha ha ha!

I'm sure Lois would like me to spend less time on my U3A groups, and more time helping her with the gardening, especially when it's spring, but I feel a little under pressure this week, with 2 group meetings inside 3 days. And, unfortunately, gardening is not one of my passions, and it will always be an also-ran for me. Language, language, language - it's a disease and I can't help it - please send help if you get this message ha ha ha!

I recall the notoriously desperate passenger who sent a tweet to the Virgin Trains company to say that there was no toilet roll in the Carriage E toilet on the Virgin Trains 19:30 from Euston to Glasgow. "Please send help," he tweeted.

"We’ll send one down to you," came the answer from head office. The man kept looking out the door and eventually he saw a man in Virgin Trains uniform bringing some toilet rolls, more than he needed probably. He is said to have quickly grabbed one and hurried back in, and the rest is history, or "his story", if you will. It's none of my "business" anyway ha ha!

My goodness, that’s the modern world for you !!!!!

Flashback to January 2015 when the toilet story hit first
the headlines - my thanks to the Daily Mirror, Kort Avis and others

12:00 Lois and I have lunch and afterwards I go to bed and take a short afternoon nap. I get up at 1:30 pm and take the bus into town. I get off in front of M&S and walk around the corner to the theatre. I meet Scilla and the other team members and we go up the stairs to the bar on the first floor. The 2-hour meeting starts, and just as I predicted, we cover exactly chapters 41-43.

The Old Norse word "skamm" occurs in the text (chapter 43), a word meaning "little". This gives me the opportunity to be a bit of a smart-ass. I tell the other group members that the Anglo-Saxons borrowed this word after they heard the local Danish immigrants using it, but they added an extra "t", so the word became the English word "scant".

This example proves that the Anglo-Saxons understood what the Danes said to them, but had not mastered Danish grammar: the letter "t" at the end of the word was just used by the Danes in certain circumstances, and was not an inseparable part of the word. What a blunder – typical of us Brits eh?!!!!

But were the other group members impressed by my great cleverness? I'm not 100% sure - the jury is still out on that one. Being smart is sometimes a lonely experience, no doubt about that.

Nobody likes a smart-ass, or a "King  Smart" or "Karl Smart", as the Danes say.
And being smart can sometimes be a lonely business, no doubt about that!
Here we see a typical lonely Karl Smart, alone with just his memories
of past verbal triumphs to comfort him – poor Karl !!!

16:15 The meeting ends, delayed by only 15 minutes this week. I feel completely washed up, as always. 

I take the bus home, and I look forward to enjoying a quiet and peaceful dinner for two with Lois, but suddenly I recall that Lois has invited Alf, who is a member of Lois's sect. She wants him to drive her over to Tewkesbury tonight, where they will both attend the sect's weekly Bible class. Alf's wife, Mari-Ann, is currently visiting the couple's son, Jeremy, in South Korea.

18:30 Alf calls at the door and we grab a quick dinner for three. Lois and Alf go off at 7:30 pm and I have a little alone time. I see a little television, the latest episode of "First Dates".



An entertaining episode. And I learn a new acronym, which is nice. We meet Sadia, a lovely 27-year-old woman prison officer with her own set of handcuffs, who says she is "BBCD" ie a "British born confused Desi" (????) – i.e. she is too westernised for the Asian community, and too Asian for the Western community. Awkward!




But it is Lynda's story that most touches me. "Mad Lynda" is a 56-year-old divorcee. Her partner of 10 years dumped her just before the wedding they had planned together. So she decided to "marry herself", at an unofficial ceremony, and invite all her friends and relatives, as a way to get over the experience, soften the pain and boost her self-confidence.

She says she always falls for men who are like her father, who was a very funny, amusing man. They were very close. "I was his princess," she says. But one day he cleared off and she didn't see him for 7 years. She says he broke her heart and her mother's heart too.

Lynda wishes in a way that he had died because she could have believed he died still loving her. But in fact, he had run off to be with someone else. The experience has blighted her life, she admits.




Genuinely moving, I think. And she found her father's betrayal too wounding to move on from, and there were then more disappointments and betrayals in store for her, sadly.

22:00 Lois comes back. Alf drops her off in front of the house. I go to bed, but Lois needs to relax and wind down after the evening's exciting Bible class, so she stays up and watches a little television. She doesn't wake me when she hops into bed with me at 11 o'clock. Zzzzzzz !!!!!!

Danish translation

10:00 Lois går ud i baghaven og går I gang med at luge lidt mellem frugtbuskene, men jeg bliver indendørs og sætter mig med computeren. Jeg er meget klar over, at jeg må ikke anstrenge mig fysisk for meget i formiddag, fordi jeg har et 2-timers møde for i eftermiddag:  Scillas U3A oldnordiske gruppe samles på baren af byens Everyman-teater, og jeg føler mig altid helt slået ud efter ét af Scillas møder – de er så intense – du godeste!

Jeg har allerede forberedt mig på Scillas møde – jeg har læst og oversat til engelsk kapitlerne 41-44 af Njals saga, og jeg forventer, at vi ikke vil have tid til at læse flere end kapitlerne 41-43 i eftermiddag, så føler jeg at jeg forholdsvis ligger lunt i svinget hvad angår Scilla.

Så beslutter jeg at  blade igennem nogle sider af Ridderens fortælling, en af Chaucers Canterbury-fortællinger, fordi Lyndas U3A ’Making of English’ gruppe holder sit månedlige møde på fredag, også på teatrets bar – yikes, travlt travlt travlt.

tilbageblik til det 14. århundrede, da Ridderens fortælling først ramte
overskrifterne – to fanger bliver forelsket i samme pige,
princesse Emily, svigersøsteren af den mand (Theseus) der fængslede dem.
Jeg ser masse af  problemer forude – hvem får pigen? Indstil næste uge for mere ha ha!

Jeg er helt sikker på, at Lois vil have, at jeg bruger mindre tid på mine U3A grupper, og mere tid på at hjælpe hende med havearbejdet, især om foråret, og jeg føler mig lidt under pres denne uge, med 2 gruppemøder indenfor 3 dage. Og desværre er havearbejde ikke en af mine lidenskaber, og havearbejde vil altid være en biting for mit vedkommende. Sprog, sprog, sprog – det er en sygdom, og jeg kan ikke gøre for det – send venligst hjælp ha ha ha!

Jeg mindes om den notoriske passager, der sendte en tweet til Virgin Trains-selskabet, at der var ingen toiletrulle tilbage på Virgin Trains 19.30 tog fra Euston til Glasgow. ”Send venligst hjælp”, tweetede han. ”Vi sender én ned til dig”, kom svaret. Greenwood holdt udkig fra døren og så på et tidspunkt en mand i sort uniform komme med nogle toiletruller. Han greb hurtigt én af dem og skyndte sig ind igen.

Du godeste, sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!!!

Tilbageblik til januar 2015: da toilet-historien første ramte
overskrifterne – Daily Mirror, den Korte Avis osv

12:00 Vi spiser frokost og bagefter går jeg i seng for at tage en kort eftermidddagslur. Jeg står op kl 13:30 og tager bussen ind i byen. Jeg står af foran M&S-storbutikken og går rundt om hjørnet til teatret. Jeg mødes med Scilla og de andre gruppemedlemmer, og vi går op ad trappen til baren på første sal. Den 2-timers møde starter, og ligesom jeg forudså, dækker vi nøjagtigt kapitlerne 41-43.

Det oldnordiske ord ”skamm” forekommer i teksten (kapitlen 43), der betyder ”en lille smule”. Det giver mig lejligheden til at se smart ud. Jeg fortæller de andre gruppemedlemmer, at angelsakserne lånte dette ord, efter de hørte de lokale danske indvandringe bruge det, men de tilføjede et ekstra ’t’, så ordet blev til det engelske ord ”scant”.

Dette eksempel beviser, at angelsakserne forstod dét, danskerne sagde til dem, men ikke havde mestret den danske grammatik:  bogstavet ’t’ i enden af ordet var bare brugt af danskerne i visse omstændigheder, og var ikke en uadskillelig del af ordet.

Men var de andre gruppemedlemer imponeret af min store klogskab? Det er jeg ikke 100% sikker på – juryen er stadig ude om det. Dét, at være smart, er nogle gange en ensom oplevelse, ingen tvivl om det.

Ingen kan lide en smartass, eller ”Kong Smart” / ”Karl Smart”, som danskerne siger.  
Men dét, at være smart, kan nogle gange være et ensomt job, ingen tvivl om det!
Her ser vi en typisk ensom Karl Smart

16:15 Mødet slutter, forsinket 15 minutter. Jeg er helt slået ud, som altid. Jeg tager bussen hjem, og jeg glæder mig til at nyde en stille og rolig aftensmad til to med Lois, men pludselig  mindes jeg om, at Lois har inviteret Alf, der er medlem af Lois’ sekt. Hun vil have ham til at køre hende over til Tewkesbury i aften, hvor de begge to vil deltage i sektens ugentlige bibelklasse. Alfs kone, Mari-Ann er i Syd-korea for tiden på besøg hos parrets søn, Jeremy.

18:30 Alf ringer på døren, og vi snupper en hurtig aftensmad. Lois og Alf skal af sted kl 19:30, og jeg har lidt alenetid. Jeg ser lidt fjernsyn, det seneste afsnit af ”First Dates”.



Et underholdende afsnit. Og jeg lærer et nyt akronym, hvilket er rart. Vi møder Sadia, en 27-årige kvindelige fængselsbetjent, der siger hun er ”BBCD” dvs ”British born confused Desi” (????) – hun er for vestliggjort for det asiatiske fælleskab, og for asiatisk for det vestlige fællesskab. Akavet!




Men det er Lyndas historie, der mest rører mig. ”Mad Lynda” er en 56-årig fraskilt. Hendes partner af 10 år dumpede hende lige før det bryllup, de havde planlagt sammen. Derfor besluttede hun at ”gifte sig med sig selv”, ved et uofficielt ceremoni, og invitere alle hendes venner og slægtninge, som en måde at komme ovenpå, lindre smerten og booste sin selvtillid.

Hun siger, hun altid faler for mænd, der ligner sin far, en meget morsom mand. De var meget tæt på hinanden. ”Jeg var hans prinsesse,” siger hun. Men en dag han stak fa, og hun så ham ikke i 7 år. Hun siger, han knuste hendes hjerte, og hendes mors hjerte også.

Lynda ønsker på en måde, at han var død, fordi hun kunne have troet, at han døde, stadig elskende hende. Men faktisk var han stukket af for at være med nogen anden. Oplevelsen forbitrede hendes tilværelse, indrømmer hun.




Hvor rørende.

22:00 Lois kommer tilbage. Alf sætter hende af foran huset. Jeg går i seng, men Lois trænger til at slappe lidt af og geare ned efter i aftens spændende bibelklasse, så hun bliver oppe og ser lidt fjernsyn. Hun vækker mig ikke, da hun kl 23 hopper op i sengen til mig. Zzzzzzz!!!!!!


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