Wednesday September 23rd 2026 "Feet, eh! We need them for so many things, don't we !!!!!"

Yes, Friends, our feet, eh?!!! We need them for so many things, as heart-throb Bernard Breslaw articulated in his big 1958 hit record, "You Need Feet" - remember that one, sports fans?

They don't write lyrics like those any more, do they!

[Thank goodness for that! - Ed]

However, feet, even today, are still 'making the running', when it comes to the bigger news stories - no pun intended!!!! Here are just a few of the headlines in today's Onion News, if you need proof!!!!

And these stories, if nothing else, bring a bit of a shy smile to the faces of me and my wife Lois this morning, here in semi-pleasant Liphook, Hampshire, as we take our almost daily walk over the "hallowed turf" of local soccer heroes Liphook United, that's for sure!

my wife Lois and me this morning, doing our near-daily walk

over the "hallowed turf" of local soccer heroes Liphook United

And we're laughing, partly because our so-called 'feet' are going to be dominating our day today, starting with a visit from "Toes Woman" - local woman Julie, who's going to be cutting our toe nails for us, would you believe! Nothing quite tells you you're old as much as having to pay somebody to cut your toe-nails for your, no question about that!

(left) a salutary warning about ageing from charity Age UK, and (right)

Lois having her toe-nails cut by local woman Julie - what madness, isn't it!

Toes aren't much use without feet, however, and feet aren't much use without legs, we've also found, in the course of our long lives (!), and Bernard Bresslaw's 1958 smash "You Need Feet" isn't the only "paeon" to that sentiment, to put it mildly!

Do you remember, from way back in 1983, "She's Got Legs (And She Knows How To Use Them)" from over-bearded combo "ZZ Top", perhaps?

And (again (!)) they don't write lyrics like that any more, do they!

[And (again), thank goodness for that! - Ed]

However, the ZZ Top combo's only arguably under-bearded member, the ironically monikered Frank Beard, sadly died recently, and, at the time, UK political magazine Private Eye's staff poet, EJ Thribb, wrote some  moving lines to commemorate Frank's passing in the magazine's popular "Poetry Corner" feature - did you see them, a couple of weeks ago, now?

Fabulous stuff wasn't it, from the pen of the magazine's master wordsmith and "obit specialist", EJ Thribb, who I believe is only 17 and a half, and already showing amazing talent, to put it mildly!

Yes, beautiful lines, aren't they, but even these have become the subject of controversy, in an admittedly 'slow news week' (!), with Amersham-based critic Roger Thomas taking up his cudgels, or his 'quills' at least (!), in the current  edition of Private Eye, to protest about the sentiments about Frank, so movingly expressed by Thribb in the previous edition, would you believe !!!!

(left) Yours Truly showcasing the current issue of political magazine Private Eye,

that "plopped" through our letterbox today, and (right) the broadside from

Amersham-based critic Roger Thomas, that's reignited the controversy - what madness!!!

What a crazy country we live in !!!!

Of course, Roger Thomas has made his name as a 'pedant', and there's a long tradition of pedantry in this country, dating back to the so-called "Pedants Revolt" of 1381 - you can even get yourself a mug commemorating the event, which is mad!

And we live not just in a crazy country, but in a crazy world too, if the Private Eye's 'special feature' on the so-called "AI tech bros" is to be believed!

What madness, isn't it! Imagine if, Elon Musk, say, were to walk into your house today, for all the world looking like a normal person and opening a non-tech conversation with you - it's the stuff of nightmares, isn't it haha !!!!!

For Lois and me, however, by contrast, this Wednesday been another busy but joyful day, with visits by two of our grandchildren, Josie (20) and Isaac (16), who have both been fleeing the chaos at their own home in nearby Headley, a house which is currently being 'infested' with builders, would you believe!

Poor them!!!!!

(above left) the home of our daughter Alison and husband Edward, currently

being renovated by builders, and (above right) our 20-year-old granddaughter Josie,

and (below) our16-year-old grandson Isaac, with his boy-girl band New Horizon

Their house is currently being renovated by builders, a-hammering and a-yammering (!) from morn till night (!), and those two young scamps Josie and Issac have sought refuge with Lois and me today - Josie in the morning to record some videos for her applications for internships with local firms, and Isaac this afternoon, to do his online video session with his Mandarin Chinese tutors - what utter utter utter madness, isn't it !!!

And Josie's and Isaac's dad, hotshot railway lawyer and company director Edward, has taken even more extreme action to get away from those builders and their hammerin' and their yammerin' !!! He's invented some obvious fabrication, some far-fetched excuse to fly to Boston - the American one (!) - for talks about a joint venture with an American railroad company, if you please!!!  A likely story, Edward! What nonsense, isn't it !!!!!

our son-in-law Edward, pictured yesterday in a Boston bar (not 'Cheers' !) with one of 

his English lawyer-pals, allegedly on a so-called 'business trip' to negotiate

a joint venture with some US railroad company. Pull the other one, Edward haha!!!

21:00 In short, it's been another crazy day for Lois and me, and nice tonight to relax with the first programme in the new series of the incredibly long-running sitcom "Not Going Out", written and masterminded by standup comedian Lee Mack, now in its 20th year.

Here's a typical scene from the series, with Lee and girlfriend entertaining friend Toby and girlfriend to a lavish dinner at their flat:

Fabulous writing, isn't it. And I'm sure that "cheapo" supermarket Lidl appreciated the "plug" - dating, of course, from those far-off days before so-called "product placement" became a bone of contention, so fair enough!

Will this do?

[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzzz!!!!!