Yes, Friends, have YOU ever watched your old dad fiddling with his phone, and wondering what he could possibly be doing with it?
Well, the mystery was solved for one local family, according to today's Onion News for East Hampshire. Just feast your eyes on this front page shocker!!!
But it's a truism, I think, that the older we get, the more difficult it can become to flirt, whether it's on our phones or in person. My wife Lois and I should know - we're both 79, would you believe, although here in semi-leafy Liphook, Hampshire, we only flirt with each other, so we wouldn't know where to start with anybody else, to be frank !
The Onion story about poor old Dad Branson, however, brings a peculiarly sardonic, and archaic, smile to our faces later today, when we turn to Lois's copy of "The Week" magazine and read about another "old codger" who, unexpectedly, was a past master (or should I say "past mistress" !!!!) at the gentle art of flirting.
Step forward, former UK Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, no less!
Reading this unexpected flood of saucy "geriatric" stories definitely puts Lois and me in a romantic frame of mind, and despite the chilly weather we opt to go for an intimate morning walk over the "hallowed turf" of local soccer heroes Liphook United, currently languishing near the bottom of the prestigious East Hampshire Premier League.
There's almost nobody else around at the ground, so with "Jack Frost nipping at our bits" and all "dressed up like Inuits", to quote my own "woke-alized" version of "The Christmas Song" (!), Lois and I share some intimate moments admiring the beauty of the trees and of the birdsong on this chilly Saturday morning (!).
And then later, after statutory "naptime", what could be more romantic at around 4pm than doing the Radio Times quizzes together, over a cup of tea and some leftover Christmas biscuits!
What is it people say?
"The couple that quizzes together fizzes together", isn't it? Perhaps we should be told!!!!
And, now, thoroughly warmed up, we score a creditable 7 out of 10 on the prestigious Mastermind questions. See how many of these "doozies" YOU know!!!!
And, now, thoroughly warmed up, we score a creditable 7 out of 10 on the prestigious Mastermind questions. See how many of these "doozies" YOU know!!!!
20:00 Back in the 1970's people certainly knew how to flirt, no question about that! And during a delightful rerun of a 50-year-old episode of "The Good Old Days" on BBC4 tonight, popular pint-size Scottish comedian Ronnie Corbett reminds us about those far-off times with one of his cheeky, slightly off-colour honeymoon jokes, which is nice!
You must know this one! It's the couple's wedding night, and the groom goes into the hotel bar for a drink, while the bride gets into bed in their room. She'd only been in bed for three minutes when a train goes past on the nearby railway line, and the vibrations almost shake her out of the bed.
The bride rings for the hotel manager to complain about the noise and vibration, but when he arrives in the room, he's mystified by her story. So she asks him when the next train is due, and he tells her that it will pass by in 3 minutes time.
Yes, the husband comes up from the bar, of course, and he sees the manager on the bed with his bride, needless to say!
[If you say so! - Ed]
Will this do?
[Oh just go to bed! - Ed]
22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzz!!!!!!!
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