19:00 Lois og jeg spiser aftensmad lidt senere, end normalt. Vi er lidt
trætte, som sædvanligt ved slutningen af en ”danske” dag, hvor vi ryddede op i
huset i morges, og styrede vores danske gruppes
to gange ugentlige møde i eftermiddags.
Jeg synes imidlertid, at disse møder ikke er så trættende som før – der er
altid en masse snak på engelsk, om ferier og om børnebørn (for eksempel Jeanette,
vores danske veninde, forventer at blive
bedstemor igen før gruppens næste møde den 10. august).
Jeg er lidt utilfreds med gruppens fremskridt, når det kommer til den
danske kriminovelle, ”Forbandet” af Gittemie Eriksen, der er gruppens nuværende
projekt. For mit vedkommende vil jeg hellere læse lidt hurtigere, så vi endelig
kan opdage morderens identitet – det kører mig skør!!!! Det ville være muligt
for mig at læse videre for mig selv, men det er sjovere, hvis vi alle sammen
samtidig finder ud af, hvem novellens skurke er.
Jeg er nysgerrig
over, om det lykkes Per Janson, landsbetjenten i denne rolig danske landsby,
der har ansvar for at undersøge de (hidtil) ca. 12 mord, at gå i seng med Mia,
den smukke lokale advokat, der kan være morderens næste offer. Forsink ikke,
Per – hun kan være død om et par dage ha ha ha.
Og hvilken rolle vil Rie Raben spille i historien? Hun er den (tilsyneladende
gravide) verdensberømte danske filmstjerne, der har spillet over for én af de
britiske James Bonds (Roger Moore?) – kunne Roger være babys far???? Og hvorfor
har Rie besluttet at slå sig ned i denne rolige men kriminalitet-redede
landsby? Kom tilbage, Roger, alt er tilgivet ha ha ha (igen).
20:00 Vi klarer vandingen af haven og så smækker benene op foran
fjernsynet, men desværre er der ikke noget meget interessant at se på –
pokkers!!!!
Jeg får fat i fjernbetjeningen og zapper lidt. Vi ser en dokumentarfilm,
der handler om historiske katastrofer (Santorini (Atlantis), Pompeii, det 17.
århundrede engelske tsunami (?), der ramte grevskaberne Somerset og
Monmouthshire, med mere) og om mulige kommende katastrofer (en mega-tsunami,
startende på de Kanariske Øer, der ødelægger Vesteuropa og det østlige USA –
uha!) . De viser uddrag fra tidligere BBC-dokumentarfilm og forskellige
"talende hoveder" (geologer, vulkanologer osv) forklarer det nye lys
kastet af moderne videnskabelige
opdagelser osv på alle disse historiske og kommende katastrofer.
Det er lidt irriterende, at BBC-kanalen kan slippe af sted med at tilbyde
os disse slags opkogninger eller ”genarbejdede” programmer, som koster ikke ret
meget penge. Men vi kan begge to lide programmets vært, Prof. Danielle George,
med hendes dejligt, lyst hår og blå øjne og charmerende mild geordie accent – du godeste, vi er blevet så overfladiske!
Programmets
dejlige vært, Prof Danielle George,
på
en strand i det sydlige Wales, hvor min mor voksede op.
Men
det er lidt irriterende, for at sige mildt, at BBC-kanalen kan slippe af sted
med
at tilbyde os disse slags opkogninger eller ”genarbejdede” programmer
Vi ser programmet til ende, men mit hjerte er ikke virkelig i det, og min
opmærksomhed vandrer. Jeg er begyndt at komponere en parodi af Heinz’s 1963 hitsang ”Ligesom
Eddie”, der var en hyldest til Eddie Cochran. Men jeg vil gerne kalde min parodi
”Ligesom Lois”, som hyldest til gæt hvem. Vores 45. bryllupsdag er næste måned.
Problemet er, at jeg har svært ved af finde ord, der rimer med navnet Lois.
Hidtil har jeg fandt på:
1.
Otis
(som i Otis Redding eller i ”Frøken Otis fortryder”) – ikke passende
2.
Hovis
(det berømte engelske bageri) og Bovis (et stort engelsk bygningsfirma) – ikke
passende
3.
Nogle
ubehagelige sygdommer: fx psychosis, thrombosis osv – ikke passende.
4.
Clovis,
kongen af frankerne – ikke passende.
Stadig et
arbejde i fremskridt. Det vil desværre tage tid til at perfektionere min parodis præcise tekst
– uha, hvis bare jeg havde mere tid! Men jeg er determineret at beholde Heinz’s
super oprindelige melodi.
Heinz’s
1963 hitsang, ”Ligesom Eddie”
22:00 Vi går i seng – zzzzzzz!!!!!!
04:00 Jeg står
tidligt op og kigger lidt på nettet.
07:30 Jeg
hopper tilbage op i sengen til Lois og vi drikker vores morgenté. Vi står op og
spiser morgenmad.
09:00 Lois skal ud. Hun har indvilliget i at hjælpe med at bemande sin
kirkes pop-up shop i formiddag. Alf kører forbi, henter hende og kører hende
til byen Tewkesbury.
Jeg har lidt alenetid. Jeg våger skinsygt over min alenetid, men desværre har mange folk en
sjette sans om, at jeg er her alene, og beslutter at ringe eller besøge mig af
en eller anden grund. Lois var ude for et par aftener siden, og jeg har
bemærkt, at sin kusine har for vane at ringe, når Lois ikke er hjemme. Jeg foregav,
jeg også var ude, og svarede ikke.
I morges jeg har fået to besøg: først et ægtepar, Jehovahs vidnere, som
Lois kender. Jeg har perfektioneret en teknik, hvor jeg besvarer døren med et
stykke brød i hånden, så det ser ud som om jeg er i gang med at spise morgenmad
eller frokost, eller noget lignende.
Lidt senere Bob, min nabo, smuttede forbi. Det er heldigt, at han ikke kan
lide at pludre – han giver mig et par rødbeder fra sin grøntsagshave – nam nam!!!!
12:00 Jeg kører over til Tewkesbury for at hente Lois og jeg kører hende
hjem. Hun siger, at der var færre kunder i morges i sin kirkes pop-up shop, men
der var desværre en meget polemisk besøgende, der så en af kirkens ”skabelse vs
evolution” pjecer i shoppens vinduesudstilling, kom ind, og spurgte Lois og
Alf, hvis de troede på dinosaurer. Han anklagede kirken på en aggressiv måde, for
at vildlede offentligheden.
Heldigvis afviste Lois og Alf at blive provokeret, og manden, der åbenbart
nyder argumenter (måske er de hans hobby),
smuttede endelig. Jeg er ikke helt sikker på, at deres debat var vel informeret
– Lois har fået idéen at forskeres dateringmetoder (for eksempel
karbondatering) ikke kan datere noget, der er ældre, end 5.000 år, hvilket i
mine ører ikke lyder 100% sandt, hvis jeg husker godt, selvom jeg ikke er
ekspert ha ha ha! Men det må vi springe over!
En af de kunder, der smuttede ind i shoppen i morges, var faktisk en ven
(ikke kæreste) af Hilary, en af de kirkemedlemmer. Hilary har fortalt Lois i
smug, at manden lider af ”hallucinationer”, selvom han ser ganske normal ud i
Lois’s optik. Før i tiden var han involveret i ulovlige stoffer, og han er
kendt til politiet. Han siger, han nu prøver at styre klar af stoffer og stoffbrugere.
Alarmklokker begynder at ringe igen i mit hoved, da jeg hører om denne mand
– du godeste!!! Kirker tiltrækker desværre nu og da mennesker med psykiske
problemer – det ved jeg med sikkerhed!!!! Desværre er jeg ikke så
menneskekærlig som Lois og hendes venner – uha!
Selve Gud kan af og til være offer for forskellige typer af originale.
Ifølge dagens Onion (den indflydelsesrige amerikanske nyhedskilde), er Gud
faldt under indflydelsen af en mystisk spirituel guru, der kalder sig selv ”The
Rishi”, og lokale ærkengle er for tiden meget bekymrede om Hans adfærd. Du
godeste, sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!!!
”The
Rishi” – endnu en original efter min mening!!!
Verden er fuld af dem !!!!!
13:00 Vi kommer hjem og spiser frokost på terrassebordet under vores
spritnye parasol.
13:45 Lois skal hen til det lokale bibliotek for at hjælpe bibliotekets
personale med at organisere og lede den ugentlige ”Baby Bounce and Rhyme”
session for unge mødre og deres små børn. Aktiviterne består af barnesange for
babys og forældre (og bedsteforældre). Da vores anden datter, Sarah, stadigvæk
boede og arbejdede i England (indtil december 2015), plejede Lois og jeg at
tage Sarahs tvillinger med til sessioner – lykkelige dage!
15:30 Lois kommer hjem og vi drikker en kop te på terrassen.
English translation
19:00 Lois and I have dinner a
little later than usual. We are a bit tired, as usual at the end of a
"Danish" day, where we cleared up in the house in the morning and led
our Danish group's twice weekly meeting in the afternoon.
However, I think these meetings
are not as tiring as before - there is always a lot of chat in English, about
holidays and about grandchildren (for example Jeanette, our Danish friend,
expects to be grandmother again before the next meeting of the group on 10
August ).
I am a little dissatisfied with
the progress of the group when it comes to the Danish crime novella,
"Accursed" by Gittemie Eriksen, the group's current project. For my
part, I'd rather read a little faster so we can finally discover the killer's
identity - it is driving me crazy !!!! It would be possible for me to read on
further for myself, but it is more fun if we all find out together who the novella's
bad guy is.
I am curious about whether Per
Janson, the police constable in this quiet Danish village, who is responsible
for investigating the (so far) approx. 12 murders, will succeed in going to bed
with Mia, the beautiful local lawyer, who may be the killer's next victim. Do
not delay, Per - she may be dead in a few days ha ha ha.
And what role will Rie Raben play
in history? She is the (apparently pregnant) world famous Danish movie star who
has played opposite one of the British James Bonds (Roger Moore?) - could Roger
be the baby's father ???? And why has Rie decided to settle down in this quiet
but crime-ridden village? Come back, Roger, all is forgiven ha ha ha (again).
20:00 We manage the watering of
the garden and then stick our feet up in front of the television, but
unfortunately there is nothing very interesting to look at - damn !!!!
I get hold of the remote control
and zap around a little bit. We see a documentary about historical disasters
(Santorini (Atlantis), Pompeii, the 17th century English tsunami (?) that hit
the counties of Somerset and Monmouthshire, and lots more) and also about
possible upcoming disasters (a mega-tsunami, starting on the Canary Islands that
destroys Western Europe and the Eastern United States - oh dear!). They show us
excerpts from previous BBC documentaries, and different "talking
heads" (geologists, vulcanologists, etc.) explain the new light cast by
modern scientific discoveries, etc. on all these historical and upcoming
disasters.
It's a little annoying that the
BBC channel can get away with offering these types of rehashes or
"reworked" programmes that do not cost a lot of money. But we both
like the programme's host, Prof. Danielle George, with her lovely fair hair and
blue eyes and charmingly mild geordie accent - good grief, we have become so
shallow!
The programme's lovely host, Prof Danielle
George,
on a beach in south Wales where my mother
grew up.
It's however a bit annoying, to say the
least, that the BBC channel can get away with
offering us these kinds of rehashes or
"reworked" programmes
We see the program to the end,
but my heart is not really in it and my attention is wandering. I have begun
composing a parody of Heinz's 1963 hit song "Just Like Eddie", which
was a tribute to Eddie Cochran. But I would like to call my parody "Just
Like Lois", as a tribute to guess who. Our 45th wedding anniversary is
next month.
The problem is that I'm having
trouble finding words that rhyme with the name Lois.So far I have found:
1. Otis (as in Otis Redding or in
"Miss Otis Regrets") - not appropriate
2. Hovis (the famous English
bakery) and Bovis (a large English building company) - not appropriate
3. Some unpleasant diseases: eg
psychosis, thrombosis etc - not appropriate.
4. Clovis, King of the Franks –
not appropriate
So, still a work in progress.
Unfortunately, it will take time to perfect my parody's exact text - oh dear,
if only I had more time! But I'm determined to keep Heinz's super original
melody.
Heinz’s 1963 hit song “Just Like Eddie”
22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzz
!!!!!!
04:00 I get up early and take a
little look online.
07:30 I jump back into bed with
Lois and we drink our morning tea. We get up and have breakfast.
09:00 Lois has to go out. She has
agreed to help man her church's pop-up shop this morning. Alf drives by, picks
her up and drives her to Tewkesbury.
I have a little bit of alone
time. I guard my alone time jealously, but unfortunately many people have a
sixth sense that I'm here alone and decide to call or visit me for some reason.
Lois was out a couple of evenings ago, and I have noticed that her cousin has
the habit of calling when Lois is not home. I pretended I was also out and did
not answer.
This morning I have had two
visits: first a married couple, Jehovah's witnesses, that Lois knows. I have
perfected a technique where I answer the door with a piece of bread in my hand,
so it looks like I'm eating breakfast or lunch, or something like that.
A little later Bob, my neighbour, drops by. It's lucky he does not like to chatter - and he gives me some beetroots
from his vegetable garden - yum yum !!!!
12:00 I drive over to Tewkesbury
to pick Lois up and I drive her home. She says there were fewer customers this
morning in her church's pop-up shop, but unfortunately there was a very
argumentative visitor who saw one of the church's "creation vs
evolution" pamphlets in the shop window display, and asked Lois and Alf
if they believed in dinosaurs. He accused the church, in an aggressive way, of
misleading the public.
Fortunately, Lois and Alf refused
to be provoked, and the man, who apparently enjoys arguments (maybe they are
his hobby) finally cleared off. I'm not quite sure that their debate was
well-informed - Lois has got the idea that scientists' dating methods (such as
carbon dating) cannot date anything older than 5,000 years, which to my ears
does not sound 100% true if I remember rightly, though I'm not an expert ha ha
ha! But we will let that slide.
One of the customers who popped
into the shop this morning was actually a friend (not boyfriend) of Hilary, one
of the church members. Hilary has told Lois that the man is suffering from
"hallucinations", although he looks quite normal in Lois's view. In
the past, he was involved in illegal drugs and he is known to the police. He
says he is now trying to steer clear of drugs and drug-users.
Alarm bells start ringing again
in my head when I hear about this man - good grief !!! Churches, unfortunately,
often attract people with mental problems - I know that for sure !!!!
Unfortunately, I'm not as charitable as Lois and her friends - oh dear!
Even God may occasionally become
a victim of various types of weirdos. According to today's Onion (the
influential American news source), God has fallen under the influence of a
mysterious spiritual guru who calls himself "The Rishi", and local
archangels are currently very concerned about His behaviour. My goodness, what
a crazy world we live in !!!!!
“The Rishi” – just one more weirdo in my
opinion!
The world is full of them !!!!
13:00 We come home and have lunch
on the patio table under our shiny new parasol.
13:45 Lois goes to the local
library to help library staff organise and run the weekly Baby Bounce and Rhyme
session for young mothers and their young children. The activities consist of
children's songs for babies and parents (and grandparents). When our other
daughter, Sarah, still lived and worked in England (until December 2015), Lois
and I used to bring Sarah's twins along to sessions - happy days!
15:30 Lois comes home and we have
a cup of tea on the terrace.
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