Danskcolin: Wednesday 20 June 2018

10:00 I walk out into the backyard and drag a hoe around between the rows in the vegetable garden. It's a bit of a surprise that this area, which I officially declared "free of weeds", just 5 weeks ago, has now become a bit of a jungle again. Damn! But nature is sometimes cruel, as they used to say in the wildlife programs on television, especially when the lions were tearing the antelopes limb from limb.

11:00 Lois walks into the village with Frances, our neighbor, to do some genealogical research in the local churchyard. She hopes to find the grave of one of her friend Mari-Ann's ancestors.

11:30 I come back into the house and take a little look online. Alison, our daughter in Copenhagen, has been attending a farewell ceremony at her three children's international school (Rygaards) this morning. Everyone sang the school's official farewell song, which moved her to tears, as always, but this year the whole thing is even more emotional: Alison's family has to move back to England in 9 days' time, after almost 6 years in Denmark - poor Ali, she's so soft hearted, no doubt about that. It's a bitter sweet time for all of them.

the school's farewell song for students leaving the school

The massive double moving-truck is standing in front of the family's house for the 2nd consecutive day. The moving company's employees will later in the day finish packing up the family's furniture and property, apart from some basic necessities of course. They all have to live in the house for another 9 days; it will be a bit like a camping holiday.

12:00 Alison sends me a text on whatsapp. She invites Lois and me to stay with them in mid-July in their old house in Haslemere, and look after the family's two cats while they take part in a family gathering with Ed's parents in the county of Dorset. Unfortunately, we cannot accept the invitation. Our neighbors, Frances and Stephen, will be in the Czech Republic that weekend and we have to look after their house in their absence. There is also the problem of Minx, Alison's previous cat, which the family left with us 5 and a half years ago when they originally moved to Denmark. Good grief - cats, don't you love them ha ha ha !!!!

13:00 Lois returns home and we have lunch. Afterwards I go to bed and take a huge afternoon nap. While I'm in bed, I look at my smartphone for a bit. I see that the world's oldest orangutan, Puan (62), has unfortunately died in Perth Zoo. I remember that Lois and I saw Puan when we visited the Perth zoo in April.

Flashback to April: Lois and I visit Perth Zoo together with

Sarah, our youngest daughter, and her (soon to be) 5-year-old twins, Lily and Jessie,

and we see Puan (I think) high up on a platform.

15:30 I get up, and Lois and I relax with a cup of tea on the couch.

I call my sister Gill in Cambridge, who hasn't been feeling well for a few months: she had an undiagnosed "event" in May, where she was taken to the hospital in Blackpool, also a kind of undiagnosed "weakness" in the left side of the body. Poor Gill!!!

She says she had a appointment with a neurologist in the mini-stroke department at the local hospital this morning. She is also waiting for an MRI scan within the next few weeks.

The neurologist said she thought Gill was simply suffering from a form of migraine. Migraines take many forms apparently and not just headaches. She believes that Gill's "event" was definitely not a stroke, which is reassuring. Gill feels herself that the fundamental source of the symptoms may be the shingles she has also been suffering from for a few months. So the jury is still out on that one.

Gill says however that she has definitely been feeling a little better over the past few weeks, which is a bit of a comfort.

18:00 The postman rings at the door. He delivers 2 DVDs, the 9th Season of Larry David's "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon's "The Trip to Spain", two presents from me to myself, so I can watch them and cheer myself up when times get tough, and all hope is gone - sob sob !!!!

18:30 We have dinner and spend the rest of the evening watching television. An interesting documentary in the series "The World's Most Extraordinary Homes" is on. The program's hosts are the charming Piers Taylor and Caroline Quentin. This episode is about unusual houses in Norway.

This kind of program is guaranteed to get Lois and me laughing. The houses have the same relation to real life that the so-called "gastroporn" has to everyday cooking.

The architecture of the houses is very beautiful and original, but the houses themselves are mostly not "homes" - they are holiday retreats, nothing else. They are far out in the country in various inaccessible places and have almost no storage. With their large open plan areas and high ceilings they would be impossible to heat or keep clean. They are pure fantasy, and not practical at all.

And when you remember that tonight we are in Norway, the houses are even more impractical: the windows have no curtains or blinds, in a country where there is almost no darkness during the summer. Good grief, what madness !!!! Is it us or the world that's gone crazy ??????

The programmers and the hosts know all this very well, so they tend to concentrate on showing us the views out of the windows and the beautiful surroundings of the houses (in forests, on cliffs, on small islands, etc.), rather than letting us see much of the interior of the houses.

Because the rooms are massive, massive furniture is also mandatory, whether it makes sense or not. Massive dining tables and massive sofas, with seating for 10-12 guests, are therefore also mandatory. The sofas always look so uncomfortable - too deep, with backs that are way too low. My god, what madness !!!! Nobody ever sits down on them, and with good reason!

why always the massive dining tables and sofas?

Is it us or the world that's gone crazy?

22:00 I take a little look at my smartphone. Ed, our son-in-law in Copenhagen, has put this touching picture on "Insta" - the massive double-moving truck has taken away almost all the family's furniture apart from some plastic chairs - my god, poor them !!!!!

some plastic chairs: all that's left in Alison and Ed's

house in Copenhagen !!! Poor them !!!!!

Lois and I go to bed -zzzzzzz !!!!!

Danish translation

10:00 Jeg går ud ind i baghaven og trække en hakke mellem rækkerne i grøntsagshaven. Det er lidt af en overraskelse, at denne område, som jeg for kun 5 uger siden officielt erklarede som ”fri for ukrudt”, er nu blevet til lidt af en jungle igen. Pokkers! Men naturen er nogle gange grusom, som man plejede at sige i vildlivprogrammer i fjernsynet, især når løver var i gang med at rive anteloper lem fra lem.

11:00 Lois går hen ind i landsbyen sammen med Frances, vores nabo, for at gøre lidt genealogiske forskning i den lokale kirkegård. Hun håber at finde graven af en af sine veninder Mari-Anns forfædre.

11:30 Jeg kommer tilbage ind i huset og kigger lidt på nettet. Alison, vores datter i København, har i morges deltaget i en farvelceremoni på sine 3 børns internationale skole (Rygaards). Alle sang skolens officielle farvelsang, hvilket rørte hende til tårer, som altid, men dette år er det hele endnu mere følelsesmæssigt: Alisons familie skal flytte tilbage til England om 9 dages tid, efter næsten 6 år i Danmark – stakkels Ali, hun er så blødhjertet, ingen tvivl om det. Det er en bittersød tid for dem alle.

skolens farvelsangen til eleverne, der skal forlade skolen

Den massive dobbelt-flyttevogn står foran familiens hus for den 2. dag i træk. Flyttefirmaets medarbejdere vil senere på dagen være færdige med at pakke familiens møbler og egendele, bortset fra nogle basale nødvendige selvfølgelig. De skal alle bo i huset endnu 9 dage; det vil være lidt som en campingferie.

12:00 Alison sender mig en sms på whatsapp. Hun inviterer Lois og mig til at bo hos dem i midten af måneden juli i deres gamle hus i byen Haslemere, og passe på familiens to katte mens de deltog i en familiesammenkomst hos Eds forældre i grevskabet Dorset. Desværre kan vi ikke acceptere invitationen. Vores naboer, Frances og Stephen, vil være i Tjekkiet den weekend, og vi må passe på deres hus i deres fravær. Der er også problemet af Minx, Alisons tidligere kat, som familien efterlod hos os for 5.6 år siden, da de oprindeligt flyttede til Danmark. Du godeste – katte, elsker du ikke dem ha ha ha?!!!!

13:00 Lois kommer hjem igen og vi spiser frokost. Bagefter går jeg i seng og tager en gigantisk eftermiddagslur. Mens jeg ligger inde i sengen, kigger jeg lidt på min smartphone. Jeg ser, at verdens ældste orangutan, Puan (62), er desværre død i Perth Zoo. Jeg mindes om, at Lois og jeg så Puan, da vi besøgte byen Perths zoologiske have i april.

tilbageblik til april: Lois og jeg besøger Perth Zoo sammen med

Sarah, vores yngste datter, og hendes (snart) 5–årige tvillinger, Lily og Jessie,

og vi ser Puan (tror jeg), højt oppe på en platform.

15:30 Jeg står op og Lois og jeg slapper af med en kop te i sofaen.

Jeg ringer til min søster Gill i Cambridge, der i et par måneder eller mere har følt sig lidt utilpas: hun havde en udiagnosticeret ”event” i maj, hvor hun blev taget til hospitalet i Blackpool, også en slags udiagnosticeret ”svaghed” i den venstre side af kroppen. Stakkels Gill! !!!

Hun siger, at hun i morges havde aftale hos en neurolog i mini-slagtilfældeafdelingen på det lokale sygehus. Hun venter også på en MRI-scan indenfor de næste få uger.

Neurologen sagde, at hun troede, at Gill simpelthen lider af en form for migræne. Migræner tager mange former tilsyneladende, og ikke bare hovedpiner. Hun tror at Gills ”event” helt bestemt ikke var en slagtilfælde, hvilket er beroligende. Gill føler selv, at den grundlæggende kilde kan være den helvedsild, hun har lidt af i nogle måneder. Så det er juryen stadig ude om.

Men Gill siger, hun alt i alt har det lidt bedre de seneste par uger, hvilket er lidt af en trøst.

18:00 Postbudet ringer på. Han leverer 2 DVD-serier, den 9. sæson af Larry Davids ”Curb Your Enthusiasm” og Steve Coogan og Rob Brydons ”The Trip to Spain”, to gave til mig selv, så jeg kan se dem for at opmuntre mig selv, når tider bliver hårde, og al håb er ude – hulk hulk!!!!

18:30 Vi spiser aftensmad og bruger resten af aftenen på at se lidt fjernsyn. De viser en interessant dokumentarfilm i serien ”Verdens mest ekstraordinære hjem”. Programmets værter er de charmerende Piers Taylor og Caroline Quentin. Dette afsnit handler om usædvanlige huse i Norge.

Dette slags program er garanteret at få Lois og mig til at grine. Husene har det samme forhold til det virkelige liv, som den såkaldte ”gastroporno” har til hverdagens normale madlavning.

Husenes arkitektur er meget smuk og original, men selve husene er for det meste ikke ”hjem” – de er feriehuse, intet andet. De ligger langt ude på landet i forskellige utilgængelige steder, og har næsten ingen opbevaring. Med deres store åbenplan områder og høje lofter ville de være umulige at varme op eller holde rene. De er ren fantasi, og overhovedet ikke praktiske.

Og når man mindes om, at vi i aften er i Norge, bliver husene endnu mere upraktiske: vinduerne har ingen gardiner eller persienner, i et land, hvor der under sommeren er næsten ingen mørke om natten. Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!! Er det os eller verden der er skør??????

Det ovennævnte ved programmagerne og værterne meget godt, så de har tendens til at koncentrere sig om at vise os udsigterne ud af vinduerne og husenes smukke omgivelser (i skove, på klipper, på små øer osv), snarere end at lade os se meget af husenes indre.

Fordi rummene er massive, er massive møbler også obligatoriske, hvad enten de giver mening, eller ej. Massive spiseborde og massive sofaer, med plads til 10-12 gæster, er derfor også obligatoriske. Sofaerne ser altid så ukomfortable ud – alt for dybe, med ryglæn, der er alt for lave. Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!! Ingen sætter sig på dem nogensinde, og med rette!

hvorfor altid de massive spiseborde og sofaer?

Er det os, eller verden, der er skør?

22:00 Jeg kigger lidt på min smartphone. Ed, vores svigersøn i København har lagt denne rørende billede op på ”Insta” – den massive dobbelt-flyttevogn har fjernet næsten alle familiens møbler bortset fra nogle plastikstole – du godeste, stakkels dem !!!!!