Monday, 8 October 2018

Thursday, October 4 – Sunday October 7 2018


For some reason, I feel like the last 2 weeks have been a massive interruption to my normal routine and my very quiet life: a week with 2 Australian guests in the house and then a week's vacation in North Devon. Now, Lois and I must get used to our customary routine again. 

In particular, for two weeks I have not for one moment been thinking about the Danish or Middle English languages, and I already feel quite rusty in both of them - damn!

Thursday, 4th of October: our U3A Danish group is holding our regular meeting here starting from 2.30 pm - in the morning we have to get the house in order, as well as browse through the next 10 pages of the Danish crime novella "Let Down", which is the group's current project. I also have to compile the Danish vocabulary test I want the members of the group to tackle. Busy, busy, busy!

The correct answers to my vocabulary test spell out the sentence "If you can't be good, be careful": I came across this expression on the web, where it was described as an old American proverb, but I'm not entirely sure of this - the jury is still out on that one. I feel that, at least, the proverb is a little bit saucier than the normal ones I use in these tests: images of condoms float before my eyes, which is a bit unpleasant to say the least. My goodness!

Safe sex: if you can’t be good, then be careful!

In fact, we read very few pages of our crime novella during the group meeting because members want to hear from Jeanette, our only genuine Danish member, about her holiday on a kibbutz in Israel. Her son has married an Israeli woman, and the couple and their 2 children are members of a kibbutz, an agricultural collective. She says that life in the kibbutz is very chaotic and all the children run wild - she was glad to be able to come back to England apparently - good grief, what madness !!!!

Jeanette, our group's only genuine Danish member

Friday, October 5: Lynda's U3A Middle English group is holding its regular monthly meeting at the town's Everyman Theater. The group's current project is one of the medieval York mystery plays,

This mystery play is about the soul of Jesus who, after his death on the cross, decides to leave his body in the grave and descend into the underworld to "save all the righteous people who have died since the beginning of the world" including unborn children, also Adam and Eve, and a bunch of other people.

The underworld is often described as the place where the unrighteous are tortured forever, so some have wondered if the underworld has actually been divided into two areas, one of them a massive torture chamber, and the other a kind of waiting room, not unlike the kind of waiting room you come across in hospitals, but significantly less pleasant.

a typical waiting room in hell

the waiting room at a typical hospital

In our group meetings we have the habit of taking turns to read a number of lines out loud and translate them into modern English.

For 2 weeks I have not thought about the Middle English language, so I am just hoping that I will be able to keep a low profile during this afternoon's group meeting.

But unfortunately, Lynda, the group leader, calls me in the morning. She sounds very upset - she had to have her dog put down last night - poor Lynda. She wants me to lead the meeting on her behalf - she also wants me to read out and translate not just my own lines, but also her own lines, as well as Margaret's lines: Margaret is also not able to attend today's meeting - damn!

Busy, busy, busy!

Saturday 6th of October we have to drive over to Bishops Cleeve, a small town 3 miles north of Cheltenham to do the shopping. We have hardly any food in the house.

On Sunday the 7th of October, Lois wants to take part in her sect's 2 worship services taking place today in the town of Tewkesbury. Unfortunately, she has back pain and cannot drive. I run her over to the town's library, where the sect holds its worship services: it's cheaper than owning and maintaining their own building, which makes sense, no doubt about that. I come back home.

In the afternoon I drive over to Tewkesbury again to pick up her after the end of the service.

If Lois drives herself on Sundays I usually have 5 hours of alone time, which makes it possible to do a lot of tasks on my to-do list, but if I have to drive her over there, my alone time is reduced to only 2 and a half hours, including lunch and afternoon nap. My god, I'm such an old misery !!!!

But at around 4 pm I start to see the light at the end of the tunnel. During our vacation in North Devon I bought a bottle of local gin, "Wicked Wolf Exmoor Gin".

Flashback to last Sunday: I buy a bottle of Wicked Wolf Exmoor Gin
at the town of Lynton's food festival

Steve, my American brother in law, has sent me a lot of information about this gin, including, for example, the best tonic to mix it with according to the influential "Master of Malt" website.


Lois digs out a slice of lemon and brings in a sprig of thyme from our vegetable garden, and I enjoy my first sip of Wicked Wolf.

Me, about to take my first sip of Wicked Wolf Exmoor Gin - hurrah!

Hurrah! Life is gradually returning to normal here. My only regret is that I did not buy a bigger bottle - damn it ! But I can buy more online - so all is not lost, thank god!


Danish translation

Af en eller anden grund føler jeg som om de sidste 2 uger har udgjort en massiv afbrydning i mit normale rutinemæssige og mit meget rolige liv: en uge med 2 australske gæster i huset, og efterfølgende en uges ferie i Nord-Devon. Nu må Lois og jeg vænne os til vores sædvanlige rutine igen. I særdelesheden har jeg i to uger ikke et øjeblik tænkt på det danske eller det middelengelske sprog, og jeg føler mig allerede ganske rusten i begge sprog – pokkers!

Torsdag den 4. oktober holder vores U3A danske gruppe sit regelmæssige møde hos os, startende fra kl 14:30 – om formiddagen skal vi få huset i orden, bortset fra at blade igennem de næste 10 sider af den danske kriminovelle ”Svigtet”, der er gruppens nuværende projekt.  Jeg skal også udarbejde den dansk ordforrådtest, jeg vil have gruppens medlemmer til at takle. Travlt, travlt, travlt!

De rigtige svar til min ordforrådtest staver sætningen ”Hvis du ikke kan være god, så vær forsigtig”: jeg faldt over dette udtryk på nettet, hvor det blev beskrevet som et gammelt amerikansk ordsprog, men det er jeg ikke helt sikker på – juryen er stadig ude om det. Jeg føler i hvert fald, ordsproget er en lille smule frækkere, end de normale jeg bruger i disse test: billeder af kondomer flyder foran øjnene, hvilket er lidt ubehageligt for at sige mildt. Du godeste!

Sikker sex: hvis du ikke kan være god, så vær forsigtig!

Faktisk læser vi meget få sider af vores kriminovelle under gruppemødet, fordi medlemmer har lyst til at høre fra Jeanette, vores eneste ægte danske medlem, om hendes ferie på en kibbutz i Israel. Sin søn har giftet sig med en israelsk kvinde, og parret og deres 2 børn er medlemmer af en kibbutz, en landbrugskollektiv. Hun siger, at livet i kibbutzen er meget kaotisk og alle børnene løber vildt – hun var glad for, at kunne komme tilbage til England tilsyneladende – du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!!

Jeanette, vores gruppes eneste ægte danske medlem

Fredag den 5. oktober holder Lyndas U3A middelengelske gruppe sit regelmæssige månedlige møde på byens Everyman-teater. Gruppens nuværende projekt er et af de midalderlige York mysteriespil,

Mysteriespillet handler om Jesus’ sjæl, der efter kroppens død på korset, beslutter sig for at efterlade kroppen i graven og stige ned i underverden for at ”frelse alle de retfærdige folk, der var død siden begyndelsen af verden”, herunder for eksempel ufødte børn, også Adam og Eva, og en flok andre folk.

På den anden side er underverden ofte beskrevet som stedet, hvor de uretfærdige blive tortureret for evigt, så nogle har spekuleret på, om underverden faktisk er blevet delt i to områder, det ene en massiv torturkammer, det andet en slags masse ventesal, ikke ulig den slags ventesal man falder over i hospitaler, men betydeligt mindre behagelig.

en typisk ventesal i helvede

ventesalet på et typisk sygehus

I gruppemøderne har vi for vane at skifte os til at læse en række linjer op og oversætte dem til moderne engelsk.

Jeg har i 2 uger ikke tænkt på det middelengelske sprog, så jeg håber bare på, at jeg vil kunne holde  lav profil under eftermiddagens gruppemøde.  

Men desværre ringer Lynda, gruppens leder, til mig. Hun lyder meget oprevet – hun måtte få sin hund aflivet i går aftes – stakkels Lynda. Hun vil have mig at styre mødet på hendes vegne – også vil hun have mig til at læse op ikke kun mine egne linjer, men også Lyndas linjer, og Margarets linjer: Margaret kan også ikke deltage i dagens møde – pokkers!

Travlt, travlt, travlt!

Lørdag den 6. oktober skal vi køre over til Bishops Cleeve, en lille by, der ligger 3 miles nord for Cheltenham for at købe ind – vi har næsten ikke noget mad i huset.

Søndag den 7. oktober ønsker Lois at deltage i sin sekts 2 gudstjenester, der finder sted i dag i byen Tewkesbury. Desværre har hun ondt i ryggen igen, og kan ikke køre bil. Jeg kører hende over til byens bibliotek, hvor sekten holder sine gudstjenester: det er billigere, end at eje og vedligeholde deres egne bygning, hvilket giver mening, ingen tvivl om det. Jeg kommer hjem igen.

I eftermiddag kører jeg over til Tewkesbury igen for at hente hende efter endt tjeneste.

Hvis Lois kører sig selv, har jeg sædvanligvis 5 timer alenetid, hvilket gør det muligt at klare en masse opgaver på min gøremålsliste, men hvis jeg selv skal køre hende derover, bliver min alenetid reduceret til kun 2,5 timer, inklusive frokost og eftermiddagslur – du godeste, jeg er sikke et gammelt pivehoved!!!!

Men kl 16 begynder jeg at se lyset for enden af tunnelen. Under vores ferie i Nord-Devon købte jeg en flaske lokale gin, ”Wicked Wolf Exmoor Gin”.

Tilbageblik til sidste søndag: jeg køber en flaske Wicked Wolf Exmoor Gin
under byen Lyntons madfestival

Steve, min amerikanske svigerbror, har sendt mig en masse information om denne gin, inklusive for eksempel, den bedste tonic at blande den med ifølge det indflydelsesrige ”Master of Malt” websted.


Lois graver en skive citron frem, og medbringer en kvist timian fra vores køkkenhave og jeg nyder min første tår Wicked Wolf.

Mig, ved at tage min første tår Wicked Wolf Exmoor Gin – hurra!

Hurra! Livet er ved at vende gradvist til det normale hos os. Min eneste fortrydelse er, at jeg ikke købte en større flaske – pokkers! Men jeg kan købe flere på nettet – alt er ikke tabt, gudskelov.


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