Danskcolin: Sunday, December 9 2018

08:30 Lois and I take a shower and after breakfast we talk on whatsapp with Sarah, our daughter in Perth, Australia, with Francis, Sarah's husband, and with their 5-year-old twins, Lily and Jessie.

The twins are predictably beginning to get excited about Christmas, which is moving closer and closer. Yesterday their family put their Christmas tree up in the corner of the living room, and today Sarah and twins have spent time decorating it.

Sarah, a qualified accountant, is the breadwinner, while Francis looks after the twins during the week, as a "papa latte" (“stay-at-home dad”) - he is 12 years older than Sarah.

However, when the twins start in full-time school next February, Francis will get the chance to take on a full-time or part-time job.

Sarah leaves her workplace at the end of her working day:

She continues to be the family breadwinner with her job as an accountant

Francis normally stays home and looks after the twins

Sarah says that a local employer in Perth has seen Francis's details and qualifications on the linkedin website (where people with a professional background can advertise their skills and abilities - Ed.) and he has sent Francis an email. The man is apparently interested in hiring Francis in some kind of role – we don’t know the details yet. Sarah and Francis will be working on polishing up Francis’s cv/resumé tonight.

When the family was still living in the UK (i.e. up until December 2015), Francis had his own IT business, where he produced computerised images of planned new houses, flats or residential neighbourhoods / residential areas, etc., to help out construction companies with getting planning permission or with selling the houses.

11:00 I get on with writing the rest of the Christmas cards on my list, first to my remaining "foreign" friends or acquaintances (in Ireland and France) and then, after that, to the ones who live in Britain. It takes me the rest of the morning plus a couple of hours during the afternoon, but it is worth getting on with the task and finishing it - hurrah! Most of the time I enclose my 2018 Christmas newsletter - some may not be all that happy to receive yet another of these, but they can always throw it away if they want - which is fair enough!

But in the midst of these busy days it is all too easy sometimes to forget about the original meaning of Christmas. In the midst of laundry, cooking, ironing and vacuuming, we sometimes forget why we celebrate it.

I read the other day about the unfashionable but sincere views of a local man, Steve Rocha, who is hoping to take us all back to first principles here for a moment (Source: Onion News).

Area man Steve Rocha recently told local journalists that he longed for the days when people understood the true meaning of the holiday, adding that he remembered a less politically correct time when Christmas was all about honouring the glory of Saturn [i.e. the Saturnalia – Ed].

“It was the only time in the year when families would gather around the altar and sacrifice a piglet to the god who ruled in the Golden Age, but today you have to act as if you are ashamed of it", said 41-year-old Rocha, adding, that people used to be able to openly celebrate the agricultural deity with a sumptuous public banquet and abundant amounts of gambling and debauchery without having to be accused of some sort of religious intolerance.

"You cannot even say 'io Saturnalia' anymore without the PC police biting your head off. Man, the days when you could spend Christmas serving food to your slaves like they were your masters, in an evening of role-reversal fun is long gone, I'm afraid. "

At press time, Rocha was complaining about the fact that the sides of holiday cups at Starbucks did not have on them one single traditional picture of Saturn at work devouring his own newborn children.

Rocha's warnings are a bit of a wake-up call, I think. We had all better prostrate ourselves before Saturn and real quick! - next week maybe.

12:30 We have lunch and afterwards I go to bed and take a huge afternoon nap. Lois is tired and has decided not to attend in person her sect's main worship service taking place today in the town of Tewkesbury - she will participate via the web instead. She gets her little glass of red wine and a piece of bread ready and puts them next to the computer, which for some reason I find incredibly touching.

15:30 I get up and we relax with a cup of tea and a piece of bread with homemade apricot jam - yum yum!

16:30 Our neighbour Frances calls at the door. She and Stephen have just made "a lightning trip to Vienna" (copyright John and Yoko), and Lois and I have been looking after their house in their absence. She thanks us and gives us a box of Vienna biscuits, which they bought over there - yum yum!

They enjoyed themselves a lot in Vienna, she says, and we remark that we also know the city quite well. These days the city is especially famous for its Chevy / Geo car sales room and their high-profile, award winning Chevy / Geo representative Karl Glodek, who is rarely out of the newspaper headlines.

According to this recent newsflash, the salesman sitting three desks away from Glodek was in full swing talking on (and on) about the chick he had banged last night, according to sources.

"You would not believe the stamina on that chick! Hours! She was a total freak!", the salesman told an unnamed friend over the phone, so loudly that Glodek and his customers, a young couple just about to sign a contract for a 2002 Chevy Prizm, could hear his account of the man's date without difficulty. "Incredible rack too – like, out to here!"

Glodek then suggested to his customers they could go outside to get another glimpse of “that beaut of a Prizm”, and the article's focus suddenly shifted more towards the couple's contract for the car, than towards the outcome of the date between Glodek's work colleague and the chick, which only goes to show the journalist concerned's inexperience, to put it mildly. Unfortunately, we will never know what happened with the chick and exactly how the date ended, which is a bit of a shame.

Flashback to 1998: Lois and I visit Vienna

for the first time: how young Lois looks!

18:00 We have dinner and spend the rest of the evening watching television. An interesting documentary is on, celebrating the 250th anniversary of the modern circus. The host of the program is the charming Doug Francisco.

An entertaining show, packed not only with exciting and groundbreaking acts, but also with interesting facts about the circus phenomenon.

I did not know, for example, that the diameter of a circus ring has not been changed throughout the modern circus's 250-year history - it's exactly 42 feet, apparently the ideal size for both human and animal circus artists.

Lois and I, however, get a little worried about the program's presenter, Doug Francisco - he looks very pale. Is he ill? We assume that the usual motto "The show must go on" has convinced him to appear regardless of his health problems, but that’s something we are not entirely sure about - the jury is still out on that one.

Doug Francisco, the host of the program, does not look quite well this evening - is he perhaps seriously ill?

But we are not entirely sure - "The show must go on",

we assume.

The show's climax is a spectacular tightrope walk very high up above the River Wear involving a couple, Chris Bullzini and the gorgeous redhead Johanne Humblet.

But there must have been some mysterious drama taking place behind the scenes, we assume. Lois and I suspect there was a problem with the woman, Johanne. At the start of the act she has not appeared yet, and Chris has to start his long walk to the bridge all by himself.

Tightrope walker Chris has to start his long journey

alone - could he and Johanne have had a fight

or broken up, even?, we wonder.

But just before the end of the act, when Chris is walking the last stretch to the bridge itself, Johanne suddenly appears, and the organisers create a special temporary rope ladder so she can join in for the last few minutes of the act. And if the couple really had been fighting just before the show, it seems as if now all is forgiven, and the couple hug each other at the end of the performance, which is nice.

Chris's partner, the gorgeous red-head Johanne,

decides at the last minute maybe, to forget about

their fight and join in for the last few minutes of the act

A large crowd beside the river witnessed the couple’s reconciliation high up above the river, and applauded them, as people do in the best romantic comedies ("romcoms").

the drama is over - the couple have been reconciled

and the crowd below applauds - hurrah!

Bottom line: circuses arriving in the neighbourhood will always be big news (source: Onion News), even after 250 years!

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzz !!!!

Danish translation

08:30 Lois og jeg tager et brusebad og efter morgenmad taler vi lidt på whatsapp med Sarah, vores datter i Perth, Australien, Francis, Sarah’s mand, og deres 5-årige tvillinger, Lily og Jessie. Tvillingerne er forudsigeligt begyndt at blive begejstret over jul, der rykker nærmere og nærmere. I går rejste familien deres juletræ op i hjørnet af stuen, og i dag har Sarah og tvillinger brugt tid på at pynte det.

Sarah, en kvalificeret revisor, er den udarbejdende mens Francis i hverdagen passer på tvillingerne som ”papa latte” – han er 12 år ældre, end Sarah.

Når tvillingerne starter i fuldtidsskole næste februar, vil Francis imidlertid få chancen for at indtage en eller anden fultidsjob eller deltidsjob.

Sarah forlader sin arbejdsplads ved slutningen af arbejdsdag:

hun fortsætter med at være familieforsøgeren med sin arbejde som revisor

Francis bliver hjemme og passer på tvillingerne

Sarah siger, at en lokal arbejdsgiver i Perth har set Francis’ detaljer og kvalifikationer på linkedin-webstedet (hvor folk med en professionelle baggrund kan annoncere deres færdigheder og evner – red.) og har sendt ham en email. Manden er tilsyneladende interesseret i at ansætte Francis i en eller anden rolle.

Da familien boede i Storbritannien (indtil december 2015) havde Francis sit eget IT-forretning, hvor han producerede computeriserede billeder af planlagte nye huse, etageejendomme eller villakvarterer/boligområder osv, for at hjælpe bygningsfirmaer med at få planlægningstilladelse eller med at sælge dem.

11:00 Jeg går i gang med at skrive resten af julekort på min liste, først til mine resterende ”udenlandske” venner eller bekendte (i Irland og Frankrig), og derefter til dem, der bor i Storbritannien. Der tager mig resten af formiddagen også et par timer i løbet af eftermiddagen, men der er det værd at klare opgaven og være færdig med den – hurra! For det meste jeg vedlægger min 2018-julenyhedsbrev – det kan være at nogle ikke vil være glade for at modtage det, men de kan altid smide det væk, hvis det har de inderst inde har lyst til – hvilket er fair nok!

Midt mellem i en travl dag er det også meget nemt at glemme juletidens oprindlige betydning. Midt mellem tøjvask, madlavning, strygning og støvsugning glemmer vi nogle gang, hvorfor vi fejrer den.

Jeg læste forleden om de umoderigtige men oprigtige synspunkter af en lokal mand, Steve Rocha, der gerne ville lede os tilbage til første principper her (kilde: Onion News).

Områdbeboeren Steve Rocha fortalte journalister for nylig, at han længedes efter de dage, hvor folk forstod den sande betydning af ferien, og tilføjede at han huskede en mindre politisk korrekt tid, da julen handlede om at ære Saturns herlighed.

Det var den eneste gang om året, hvor familier skulle samles rundt om alteret og ofre en pattegris til guden, der hersker i Gyldenalderen, men i dag skal man handle som om du skammer dig over det," sagde 41- gamle Rocha og tilføjede, at folk plejede åbenbart at fejre landbrugsguden med en overdådig offentlig banket og rigelige mængder af lege og udsvævelser uden at blive anklaget for en eller anden form for religiøs intolerance.

"Du kan ikke engang sige ”io Saturnalia” længere uden at pc-politiet bider dit hoved af. Mand, de dage, hvor du kunne bruge jul på at servere mad for dine slaver som om de var dine herrer i en aften af sjov rollevending, er længe, lang borte, frygter jeg. "

På pressetid beklagede Rocha det faktum, at feriekoppernes sider på Starbucks ikke havde et enkelt traditionelt billede af Saturn, der fortærede sine egne nyfødte børn.

Rochas advarsler er lidt af et vågneopkald, synes jeg. Vi må bøje os dybt foran Saturn, og så snart som muligt – næste uge måske.

12:30 Vi spiser frokost og bagefter går jeg i seng og tager en gigantisk eftermiddagslur. Lois har besluttet ikke at deltage personligt i sin sekts hovedsagelige gudstjeneste, der finder sted i dag i byen Tewkesbury – hun vil deltage via nettet i stedet for. Hun forbereder sit lille glas rødvin og et stykke brød og sætter dem ved siden af computeren, hvilket jeg af en eller anden grund finder utroligt rørende.

15:30 Jeg står op og vi slapper af med en kop te og et stykke brød med hjemmlavet abrikos-marmelade – yum yum!

16:30 Vores nabo Frances ringer på døren. Hun og Stephen har tilbragt nogle dage i Wien, og Lois og jeg passede på deres hus i deres fravær. Hun takker os og forærer os en kasse med wienerbrød, som de købte derovre – yum yum!

De hyggede sig meget i Wien, siger hun, og vi bemærker, at vi også kender byen ret godt. Byen er specielt verdensberømt for sit Chevy/Geo salgslokale og prisvindende Chevy/Geo repræsentant Karl Glodek, der sjældent er ude af de lokale avisers overskrifter.

Ifølge en nylig artikel var repræsentanten, der sad tre skranker væk fra Glodek i fuld gang med at snakke videre (og videre) om den tøs, han i aftes knaldede, rapporterede kilder for nylig.

”Du ville ikke tro på denne tøs’ stamina! Jeg taler timer! Hun var en total freak!”, fortalte repræsentanten en unævnt ven i telefonen, så højlydt, at Glodek og hans kunder, et ungt kærestepar, der skulle lige til at underskrive kontrakten om en 2002 Chevy Prizm sedan, kunne høre uden besvær. ”Utrolige patter også - ligesom skød så langt frem mod mig!”

Glodek foreslog på dette tidspunkt, at parret gik udenfor for at få "endnu et kig på den skønhed af en Prizm", og artiklens fokus blev pludselig sat mere på parrets kontrakt med Glodek, end på udfaldet af daten mellem Glodeks arbejdskollega og den udholdende tøs, hvilket viser journalistens uerfaring, for at sige mildt. Vi vil nu desværre aldrig vide, hvad der skete og hvordan daten endte !

Tilbageblik til 1998: Lois og jeg besøger Wien

for første gang: hvor ser hun dog ung ud !!!!

18:00 Vi spiser aftensmad, og bruger resten af aftenen på at se lidt fjernsyn. De viser en interessant dokumentarfilm, der fejrer 250-årsdagen for det moderne cirkus. Programmets vært er den charmerende Doug Francisco.

Et underholdende show, propfyldt ikke bare med begejstrende og banebrydende numre men også med interessante kendsgerninger om cirkusfænomenet. Jeg vidste ikke, for eksempel, at diameteren af en circusring er ikke blevet forandret igennem det moderne cirkus’ 250-årige historie – det er nøjagtig 42 fods, tilsyneladende den ideelle størrelse til både menneskelige og dyriske cirkusartister.

Lois og jeg bliver imidlertid lidt bekymret over programmets vær Doug Francisco – han ser meget bleg ud. Er han syg? Vi formoder, at den sædvanlige motto ”the show must go on”, har overtalt ham til at dukke op uanset sine sundhedsproblemer, men det er vi ikke helt sikre på – juryen er stadig ude om det.

Doug Francisco, programmets vært, ser desværre

ikke ret frisk i aften: Er hun måske alvorligt syg?

Men det er vi ikke helt sikre på – ”

The show must go on”, we assume.

Showets klimaks er en spektakulær linedansakt meget højt over floden Wear involverende et par, Chris Bullzini og den pragtfulde rødhårede Johanne Humblet.

Men der må være samtidig et eller andet mysteriøst drama, der foregår bag kulisserne, formoder vi. Lois og jeg mistænker, at der var noget problem med kvinden, Johanne. Ved starten af numret er hun ikke dukket op endnu, og Chris må starte sin lange rejse mod broen helt alene.

Linedanseren Chris må starte sin lange rejse alene –

har han og Johanne måske skændtes eller slået op?, spekulerer vi.

Men lige før enden af numret, da Chris er ved at gå den sidste strækning op til selve broen, dukker Johanne pludselig op, og myndighederne opretter en speciel midlertidige rebstige, så hun kan være med for numrets sidste minutter. Og hvis parret i virkeligheden havde skændtes lige før forestillingen, ser det ud som om, alt nu er tilgivet gudskelov, og parret klammer hinanden ved slutning af numret.

Chris’ partner, den pragtfulde rødhårede Johanne, beslutter på sidste minut måske at glemme deres skænderi og være med for numrets sidste øjeblikke

En stor mængde ved siden af floden vidnede parrets forsoning højt oppe over floden, og applauderede dem, ligesom folk gør i de bedste romantiske komedier.