Tuesday, December 4 2018

08:00 Lois and I get up and take a shower. While we are in the cubicle, the phone rings, which is a bit inconvenient to put it mildly, but I'm going to let that one slide.

It's my friend, "Magyar" Mike on the line. He says he cannot come over here today to take part in our weekly "Hungarian lesson" (10 am to 11 am) - his car is frozen up, he says, and he has had trouble opening the car door, etc. He also says that the roads near his house are very slippery.

My god, what madness! Mike has simply become a very nervous driver - I have no doubts about that. And it's all a bit of a shame because Lois and I spent a lot of time yesterday driving around to confirm that there were no longer any roadworks on Mike's route from Nailsworth to Cheltenham. We also spent time buying Christmas presents for Mike and "Magyar Mary", his wife, and wrapping them up with Christmas wrapping paper, etc. Damn!

"Magyar" Mike in happier times, in 2017 in Prague

with Stephen (his grandson) and "Magyar" Mary, Mike’s wife

10:00 After breakfast, Lois and I drive over to the Dunelm department store to buy a set of double sheets and a duvet cover as our Christmas presents to our daughter Alison and son-in-law Ed in Haslemere, Surrey. Afterwards we head over to the "The Range" cut-price department store to buy some art materials for Alison and Ed's three children and for Lois's niece Sharon's two young children, Lily-Rose and "Little" Lois.

As we look around in "The Range", I hear some sentimental Christmas pop songs over the tannoy, "All I Want for Christmas is You" (Maria Carey) and "Do They Know It's Christmas" (Band Aid), etc., and suddenly for the first time this year, I come over a bit emotional, and tears begin to fill my eyes. My god, what madness !!! I'm such an idiot, and that’s for sure !!!!

A few years ago I saw a chart of the top 6 most unfestive Christmas songs (source: the influential local news website Onion News):

However, I am a little concerned that the list is now 6 years old - and things change rapidly in the world of unfestive Christmas songs - I wonder if "Christmas Sucks" has long ago shot to the top of the list maybe?

But it's possible that more and more new Christmas songs are being released every year (I just wouldn't know), to add to the many overlooked old favourites, and Onion News also recently reported a local man's review of just such an old, forgotten classic: Frosty the Snowman.

Calling it one of the "true overlooked gems" in the Christmas-song canon, local holiday music aficionado Steve Robinson strongly recommended that his friends "do themselves a favour" and listen to "Frosty The Snowman".

"Oh man, 'Frosty' is unreal, you've got to check it out," said Robinson, adding that the song's innovative fusion of jazz and lullaby conventions was "peerless" and "way ahead of its time."

"Great concept, tight arrangement, and the lyrics are just incredible. Love that line about the 'two eyes made out of coal’. Classic!"

Robinson also maintained that, with its unorthodox repetitive structure, dramatic build, and "mind-blowing" imagery, "The 12 Days Of Christmas" is about as good as it gets.

It is a bit surprising in my opinion that Robinson, with his unconventional views and his legendary ability to "think outside the box" is not more popular in the village, but I have noticed that he is just one more of the growing number of maverick critics that  people round here try to avoid when they see them in the local pubs.

It’s so true, that old saying, that "a prophet is not without honour save in his own country".

11:00 Lois and I come home and relax with a cup of coffee on the couch. We have lunch at 12 and afterwards I go to bed and take a huge afternoon nap.

15:00 I get up, and Lois and I drive into the village. We swing by the local post office to ship various Christmas packages to our grandchildren in Haslemere, and to our twin grandchildren in Perth, Australia. Afterwards we pop into the local convenience store (the former Bakery Stores), to buy potatoes and bread. Coincidentally we bump into Catherine, a former close friend of my mother (who died in 2011) and of my dad (who died in 2000), and it's nostalgic to talk a little to her about old times.

We come home and relax with a cup of tea on the couch.

16:30 I pour myself a strong gin and tonic. It’s the period 4:30 pm to 5:30pm that’s the low point in my energy levels, and I've got in the habit of having a strong gin and tonic at that time to recharge my batteries. Currently, I am drinking a gin that my American brother in law Steve, recommended, "Beefeater London Garden". Needless to say, of course it tastes really good, I have to say.

me and my gin

As I write up what we have done today, it does not sound a lot, but I think it must have been quite stressful: I'm tired, and Lois has a bad back and does not want to attend her sect’s weekly bible seminar taking place this evening in Brockworth town library. The conclusion is obvious - we are just two old crows now - yikes !!!!

18:15 We have dinner and afterwards we watch some television, an interesting documentary (1st part of 3) all about the history of the Scottish clans. The program’s presenter is the charming Neil Oliver.

Not my favourite type of historical documentary because it's packed with bloody reconstructions, but I'm going to let that one slide. At the moment I'm particularly interested in Robert Bruce, the subject of this first episode, because Lynda's U3A Middle English group is currently reading John Barbour's long epic poem about Robert, and the next monthly meeting of the group will be taking place on Friday afternoon at the bar of our local Everyman theatre.

The poem was written in the year approx. 1375 in Scots English, and is all about Robert, and the role he played in the Scottish War of Independence.

At the group's last meeting in October, I asked Lynda to let us next time read the most famous part of Robert’s story, i.e. where he’s sitting in a cold cave in wintertime: he is fleeing from King Edward and the English, and he’s watching a spider trying repeatedly to climb the wall of the cave: every time the spider falls on the ground it gets up again and makes another attempt. The spider’s determination encourages and inspires Robert to resume his  fight against the English invaders (according to the legend).

Robert and the spider (cave-couch by Acme Furniture Warehouse)

We group members are all old crows in our 60s and 70s, and we were all brought up on the story of Robert, and the spider that inspired him during his period in the wilderness. But unfortunately Lynda told me on Sunday that the spider incident is not found in the poem. It was a later addition to the myth, it appears.

Tonight’s documentary with Neil Oliver unfortunately confirms that the spider was just a myth that was added at a later date.

In fact, Robert spent the winter of 1306 in bed with the lovely "Christiana of the Isles," the chief of the clan Ruaidrhy (= Rory?). Scottish clans at that time were happy to accept women as their chieftains.

Christiana bore Robert’s child the following year. And Christiana's clan joined with Robert's other supporters, the Macdonald clan and the Campbell clan, as his main allies in his guerrilla war against the English army.

Robert actually spent the winter of 1306 in bed with Christiana (picture, right),

a female clan chief, and probably without a single spider in sight – good grief!

The myth-writers must at some later point have decided to cut out references to Christiana in this part of Robert's story, and instead they came up with the cold cave story and the spider.

Obviously Robert spotting a spider climbing up Christiana's bedroom wall would have carried much less of an emotional punch, particularly if Christiana (or Robert) had started screaming for example. My god, what a crazy world we live in !!!!

22:00 I realise that Lois has slept through almost the entire program. I wake her up gently and we go to bed - zzzzzz !!!

Danish translation

08:00 Lois og jeg står op og tager et brusebad. Mens vi er i brusekabinen i gang med at vaske os, ringer vores telefon, hvilket er lidt ubekvemt for at sige mildt, men de springer jeg over.

Det er min ven, ”Magyar” Mike på linjen. Han siger, han i dag ikke kan komme herover for at deltage i vores ugentlige ”ungarske time” (kl 10 til kl 11) – hans bil er opfrossen, siger han, og han har haft svært ved at åbne bildøren osv. Også han siger, at vejene i nærheden af sit hus er meget glatte.

Du godeste, sikke et vanvid! Mike er blevet til en meget nervøs chauffør – det har jeg ikke nogen tvivl om. Og det hele er lidt af en skam, fordi Lois og jeg brugte en masse tid i går på at bekræfte, at der ikke længere var noget vejarbejde på Mikes rute fra Nailsworth til Cheltenham. Vi brugte tiden også på at købe julegaver til Mike og til hans kone, ”Magyar Mary”, og på at pakke dem ind med julepapir osv. Pokkers!

”Magyar” Mike i lykkeligere tider, i 2017 i Praga

sammen med Stephen (sit barnebarn) og ”Magyar” Mary, sin kone

10:00 Efter morgenmad kører Lois og jeg over til Dunelm-stormagasinet for at købe et sæt dobbelt-lagner og et dynebetræk som  vores julegaver til vores datter Alison og svigersøn Ed i Haslemere, Surrey. Bagefter kører vi over til ”The Range”-stormagasinet for at for at købe nogle kunstmaterialer til Alison og Eds tre børne og Lois’ niece Sharons to unge børne, Lily-Rose og ”Lille” Lois.

Mens vi kigger rundt omkring i ”The Range”,  hører jeg nogle sentimentale julepopsange over tannoyen, ”All I Want For Christmas is You” (Maria Carey) og ”Do They Know It’s Christmas” (Band Aid) osv, og pludselig føler jeg mig for første gang i år lidt rørstrømsk, og tårer begynder at fylde mine øjne. Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!! Jeg er sådan en idiot, ingen tvivl om det!!!!

For nogle år siden så jeg en hitliste bestående af de mest ufestlige julesange (kilde: den indflydelsesrige lokale nyhedswebsted Onion News):

Jeg er imidlertid lidt bekymret over, at listen nu er snart 6 år gammel – og ting ændrer sig hurtigt i verden af ufestlige julesange, og jeg spekulerer på, om ”Christmas Sucks” for længes siden er skudt til tops på listen.

Men det kan være at der hvert år udsendes flere og flere nye julesange, også mange oversette tidligere favoritter, og  Onion News rapporterede også for nylig en lokal mands anmeldelse af lige sådan en gammel, glemt klassiker: Frosty the Snowman.

Den lokale julemusikekspert Steve Robinson anbefalede i denne uge stærkt, at hans venner "gør sig selv en tjeneste" og lytter til "Frosty The Snowman." Han kaldte det en af de "sande overset perler" i den nationale julesangskanon.

"Åh mand, Frosty er fantastisk, du må tjekke det ud," sagde Robinson og tilføjede, at sangens innovative fusion af jazz og vuggevise-konventioner var "uforlignelig" og "langt forud for sin tid".

"Flot koncept, stramt arrangement, og teksten er bare utrolig. Elsker den der linje om" to øjne lavet af kul. "En klassiker!”

Robinson hævdede også, at med sin uortodokse gentagende struktur, dramatisk opbygning og "mind-blowing" billedverden, er "The 12 Days of Christmas" lige så god som det bliver.

Det er lidt overraskende efter min mening, at Robinson, med sine ukonventionelle synspunkter og sin legendariske evne til at ”tænke udenfor boksen”, ikke er mere populær i landsbyen, men jeg har bemærket, at han bare er endnu en maverick kritik, som folk prøver at unddrage sig når de ser ham i de lokale pubber.

Det var så sandt, det der gamle ordsprog: "en profet er uden ære i sit eget land”.  

11:00 Lois og jeg kommer hjem og slapper af med en kop kaffe i sofaen. Vi spiser frokost kl 12 og bagefter går jeg i seng og tager en gigantisk eftermiddagslur.

15:00 Jeg står op og Lois og jeg kører ind i landsbyen. Vi smutter ind det lokale postkontor for at afsende forskellige pakker til vores børnebørn i Haslemere, og til vores tvillingerbørnebørn i Perth, Australien. Bagefter kigger vi ind i den lokale nærbutik den tidligere Bakery Stores, for at købe kartofler og brød. Tilfældigvis ser vi i nærbutikken Catherine, en tæt ven af min mor (der døde i 2011) og af min far (der døde i 2000), og det er nostalgisk at snakke lidt med hende om gamle tider.

Vi kommer hjem og slapper af med en kop te i sofaen.

16:30 Jeg skænker mig selv en stærk gin og tonic. 16:30 indtil 17:30 er min energiforsynings lavpunkt, og jeg er kommet i vane med at drikke en stærk gin og tonic  for at genoplade mine batterier. For tiden drikker jeg en gin, min amerikanske svigerbror Steve, anbefalede, ”Beefeater London Garden”. Unødvendigt at sige, men selvfølgelig smager den rigtigt godt – det må jeg nok sige.

me and my gin

Da jeg skriver op hvad vi har gjort idag, lyder det ikke ret meget, men jeg synes, det må have været lidt stressende: jeg er træt, og Lois har ondt i ryggen, og har ikke lyst til at deltage i sin sekts ugentlige bibelseminar, der finder sted i aften i byen Brockworths bibliotek. Min konklusion er, at vi nu bare er to gamle krager – yikes!!!!

18:15 Vi spiser aftensmad og bagefter ser vi lidt fjernsyn, en interessant dokumentarfilm (1. del af 3), der handler om historien af de skotske klaner. Programmets vært er den charmerende Neil Oliver.

Ikke min yndlingstype af historisk dokumentarfilm, fordi den er propfyldt med blodige rekonstructioner, men det springer jeg over. Jeg er specielt interesseret i Robert Bruce, emnet af dette første afsnit, fordi Lyndas U3A middelengelske gruppe for tiden er i gang med at læse John Barbours lange episke digt om Robert, og gruppens næste månedlige møde finder sted på fredag eftermiddag på baren af vores lokale Everyman-teater.

Digtet blev skrevet i ca. 1375 på skotsk-engelsk, og handler om Robert, og om rollen han spillede i den skotske uafhængighedskrig.

På det seneste møde, i oktober, bad jeg Lynda om at lade os næste gang læse den del af Roberts historie, hvor Robert sidder i en hule, han er på flugt fra Edward og englænderne, og han kigger på en edderkop, der prøver gentagende gange at klatre op ad hulens mur: hver gang han falder på jorden, rejser  han sig op igen og gør et andet forsøg. Edderkoppens determination opmuntrer og inspirerer Robert at genoptage kampen mod de engelske invaderende.

Robert og edderkoppen (huleseng fås i Acme Furniture Warehouse)

Vi gruppemedlemmer er alle gamle krager i 60’erne og 70’erne, og vi blev alle opdraget med historien af Robert og den edderkop, der inspirerede ham under sit vildnis periode . Men desværre fortalte Lynda mig i søndags, at edderkop-hændelsen ikke findes i digtet. Det var en senere tilføjelse til myten, lader det til.

Aftenens dokumentarfilm med Neil Oliver bekræfter desværre, at edderkoppen bare var en myte, der blev tilføjet på et eller andet senere tidspunkt.

Faktisk tilbragte Robert vinteren 1306 i sengen af den dejlige ”Christiana af Øerne”, høvdingen af klanen Ruaidrhy (=Rory?). Skotske klaner accepterede dengang kvinder som høvdinger. Christiana fødte Roberts barn det følgende år. Og Christianas klan sluttede sig til Roberts andre tilhængere, Macdonald-klanen og Campbell-klanen for at hjælpe ham med sin guerillakrig mod den engelske hær.

Robert tilbragte faktisk vinteren 1306 i seng med Christiana (til højre),

en kvindelig klanhøvding, uden en enkel edderkop i syne – du godeste!

Du godeste, sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!!

22:00 Lois har sovet igennem næsten hele programmet. Jeg vækker hende blidt op og vi går i seng – zzzzzz!!!