Smoke alarms, smoke detectors - they're a bit of a mystery, aren't they, and my medium-to-long-suffering wife Lois and I have never really paid much attention to the shiny new ones we've got, which proudly (and on a daily basis) showcase their "elevated" position on our ceilings. And they've been doing it ever since we moved into this new-build home in Malvern, Worcestershire almost 2 years ago now. But we've never paid the slightest attention to them.
Who knows what's inside those "little buggers", though !!!!
And news stories, too, about smoke alarms and smoke detectors are coming thick and fast these days, aren't they, and it's heart-warming to see all the improvements that those clever "boffins" are making to them on an almost hourly basis, which is nice!
Onion News's local West Worcestershire Desk despite is often criticised locally for "spoofing", or being "frivolous" or "trivial", but give them their due: they're fully "on the ball" when it comes to smoke alarm stories, which is reassuring.
There were three smoke alarm stories on one day yesterday (!) - did you catch them?
Well, seeing as how, apart from my so-called "Editor" (!), you're all obviously interested (!) to know the answer, the truth is that one of our smoke detectors downstairs started beeping every 30 seconds in the night last night, which was a bit annoying, but we managed to sleep through it on the whole, I'm proud to say.
The detector is obviously pleading for a new battery, so it's very much a "cry for help" by one of the little buggers. But the almost-constant beeping is annoying, especially as we're expecting visitors on Sunday, and we don't want to have to chat over the sound of beeping - call us obsessionally-overconsiderate if you like!
We're not too concerned about the fire risk, because this is a shiny new, fully modern house, and there's a smoke alarm on average about every 6 feet, so I don't think we'll be burnt alive in our beds while we try to find out how to change the battery (!).
And changing the battery's not going to be 'rocket science' anyway, we feel sure.
changing the battery in a smoke alarm - not exactly
rocket science is it (!). And here's a scientist explaining why (!)
Luckily the beeping stops anyway, by the time we go out for our morning walk by the Hereford to Worcester railway line and past the prestigious Malvern College Boarding School, so that's all right (only joking (!)).
we see the West Midlands Railway Co.'s "Hereford Flyer"
on its way to Hereford from Worcester, signalling that the line
is back in action again after work on the points and signals
me showcasing my jeans-clad legs - it's a bit of a
"brrr!!" day today, and we're both sporting our
winter coats for the first time this year - brrrrr (again) !!!!!
we pass the entrance to the prestigious coed boarding school,
Malvern College, founded in 1865, and its massive 250-acre campus
in the lee of the wonderful 700-million-year-old Malvern Hills
During World War II, the school was taken over by the Navy and the kids had to "slum it" in Blenheim Palace, Oxfordshire.
Poor kids !!!!!
Blenheim Palace, Oxfordshire, built between 1705 and 1722 for the
Duke of Marlborough, the palace where Malvern College pupils
had to "slum it" when their school was taken over by the Navy in 1939
The school has hosted lots of distinguished visitors since its foundation, adds Lois, including the American poet Longfellow in 1868, and in 1870 Prince William of Schleswig-Holstein and his "squeeze", one of Queen Victoria's daughters, Princess Helena, came for the school's annual Speech Day.
Fascinating stuff, isn't it! [If you say so! - Ed]
Well, it's a bit of light relief for Lois and me, because we're spending most of today making our house look "respectable" for the visit tomorrow of one of Lois's old co-workers, Sheila. Both Lois and Sheila worked at a care home for ex-vicars in Cheltenham, but both women retired in the early 2000s.
Almost all their other co-workers have now "passed on", which is sad, but it'll be nice for Lois and Sheila to get together tomorrow for a chat about "the good old days", that's for sure.
flashback to circa 1995: the local retirement home for Anglican vicars,
when female staffers dressed up as schoolgirls for the charity
"Red Nose Day": Lois is on the far right, wearing one of
my old Bristol Grammar School ties round her neck
- Lois dresses up as a footballer for her working day at the care home
flashback to February 2022: the Gloucestershire County
Air Ambulance lands in Cheltenham carrying a doctor a
and paramedic to treat an injured footballer and
before ferrying him to Frenchay Hospital, Bristol
The home's retired vicars always looked doddery, but Lois was more than once "grabbed in the laundry room" or "pinned up against a Welsh dresser" by some of the home's more "athletic" churchmen.
What crazy days those were !!!!
Fortunately Lois was always able to defuse these potentially embarrassing "#metoo moments" with a combination of her detailed knowledge of scriptural chapter-and-verse Bible teaching, and her sheer proto-feminist, honest-go-goodness Baby Boomer muscle power.
"You could knock most of 'em down with a feather!", she always used to say.
What a woman I married !!!!
22:00 Tired out by all our cleaning, dusting, hoovering, moving stuff from room to room etc, we go to bed - zzzzzzzz !!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment