Danskcolin: Fredag den 24. november 2017

09:00 Lois og jeg bruger formiddagen på at sikre, at vores planlagte ferie i Australien næste år kan finder sted, og at der er ingen showstoppere. Vores datter Sarah har inviteret os til at besøge hendes familie i Perth i foråret (Australiens efterår) og tilbringe tid hos dem alle: også Francis, Sarahs mand, og deres 4-årige tvillinger, Lily og Jessie.

Vi finder ud af, at vores naboer, Frances og Stephen, vil være hjemme under hele vores fravær, og kan passe på vores hus og klare vores post. Og Pussy Willows det lokale kattehotel bekræfter at de har en ledig hytte til Minx, Alisons kat, som hun efterlod hos os for 5 år siden, da famlien flyttede til Danmark.

Pussy Willows kattehotel har ikke nogen restaurant men en udmærket room service:

al mad bliver serveret i gæsters hytter.

Ingen tillægsgebyr til enkelt belægning ha ha ha!

Stakkels Minx !!!!!!!!!

10:30 Vi går hen ind i landsbyen og smutter ind i Waghornes, den lokale slagterforretning, og køber kød og brød. Vi bestiller en kalkun og noget bacon til jul. Vi kommer hjem.

11:30 Vi kører over til det lokale Waitrose-supermarked og smutter ind i det lokale Thomas Cook-rejsebureau, der har til huse i supermarkedet og køber vores flybilletter til Australien.

byens Waitrose-supermarked

Vi får lidt af en behagelig overraskelse, når vi hører at en chauffør vil hente os og kører os til Birmingham lufthavn, og en anden vil kører os fra Perth lufthavn til Sarahs hus i forstaden Leederville, eller til familiens næste hus, hvis de flytter fra deres nuværende hus, selvom det kan være, at vi skal betale lidt ekstra, hvis afstanden er mere, end 25 miles (45km) fra lufthavnen.

12:30 Vi siger farvel til Rachel, Thomas Cook-rejsebureauens ekspeditrice. Vi er trætte og sultne, men vi finder, at supermarkedets restaurant af propfyldt af fornemme mennesker – pokkers!

Waitrose er den fornemest af Cheltenhams mange supermarkeder. Kunderne har tendens til at være ældre eller forholdsvis velhavende (eller begge). De har tendens til at blokere midtergangene med deres indkøbsvogne, fordi de har for vane ikke at bemærke andre folk, men de er meget høflige, når man siger ”Undskyld”! Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!!

13:00 Vi dropper ideen af at spise i Waitrose-restauranten og kører over til Wyevale-havecentret for at spise frokost. Både Lois og jeg føler os lidt udkørt – vi føler os slatne som karklude: det er ikke hver dag, man bruger tusindvis af pounds for at flyve til den anden side af verden og tilbage.

Lois bestiller fiskpostej, og jeg bestiller torsk dyppet i en ølbaseret beignetdej, med pommes frites og ærter – nam nam! Vi begynder at geare lidt ned efter formiddagens spænding.

Vi sidder i butikkens café og snakker lidt om vores beslutning ikke at overnatte i Dubai på vej til Perth. Første gang vi besøgte Sarah (i 2016) overnattede vi på et hotel i nærheden af Dubai lufthavn. Vores fly fra Birmingham ankom til Dubai ved 17-tiden om eftermiddagen, og vi tjekkede ind i hotellet og væltede straks i seng. Resultatet var, at efter vi tog rejsens 2. etape, Dubai kl 8 (lokal tid) til Australien kl 5 næste dag (lokal tid), ankom vi forholdsvis friske og frejdige i Australien. Timingen var perfekt, men denne flyvetur med ankomst kl 17 er desværre blevet tilbagetrukket af Emirates-skyselskabet – pokkers!

Derfor har vi besluttet ikke at overnatte i Dubai på vej over til Perth.

tilbageblik til april 2016: Lois (ovenfor) og jeg venter foran

vores hotel i Dubai på shuttle-bussen til lufthavnen

Der er også andre grunde til ikke at overnatte der. Efter al den dårlig press og alle artiklerne, vi for nylig har læst om, hvor kønne emiratarabere er, er jeg lidt bange for at en eller anden af disse smukke mænd vil fordreje hovedet på Lois. Det er kun for 4 år siden at 3 emiratarabere ble forvist af Saudi Arabien for at være ”for sexede” (rapport, Onion News-webstedet). En af dem havde lagt et foto af sig selv op på Facebook, hvor han bar eyeliner. Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!

Nyhedskilden mente af en eller anden grund, at saudiarabernes dom var lidt kontroversiel, og jeg mindes, at deres websted bad Lois og mig om vores personlig meninger, ikke noget, der sker hver dag – ingen tvivl om det! Vi følte os en lille smule hædret, og diskuterede argumenterne på begge sider, uden at komme til en fast konklusion.

Heldigvis havde et repræsentativt udvalg af nyhedskildens læsere bidraget med en vifte interessante synspunkter, eksempelvis (1) ”De er væk gudskelov!” (Arthur Ettel, kondensatormonterer), (2) ”det nøjagtig samme skete med mig, men i stedet af, at de sagde, jeg var for sexet, sagde de, at jeg var for voldsom” (James Fearing, systemanalytiker), og ”Jeg synes, mænd faktisk ser mest sexede ud, når de ikke bærer makeup og bare er sig selv” (Donnamarie Post, svejsebrænder).

Vi beslutter, vi hælder til det 3. og sidste synspunkt, som Donnamarie Post udtrykker. Jeg genkender hendes ansigt, men jeg er ikke helt sikker på jeg husker hendes navn. Jeg mistænker i hvert fald, at vi har set hendes udtalelser før i Onion News, og vi kan godt lide hendes stil. Hun synes at skifte jobs hyppigt, og ofte påtager sig det slags arbejde, der kræver meget faglært arbejdskraft, men det ser ud til, at hun kan mestre dem meget hurtigt – hun er bestemt alsidig, ingen tvivl om det. En ros til dig, Donna!

Donnamarie Post: vi kan godt lide hendes stil !

18:00 Vi spiser aftensmad og bruger resten af aftenen på at se lidt fjernsyn. De viser den 3. del af en interessant dokumentarfilmserie (i 4 dele) om Trumps stigning til magten.

Dette 3. afsnit handler om Trump sidst i 1980’erne og først i 1990’erne, og starter med måske hans største kriseperiode: bruddet af hans ægteskab med Ivana, og (samtidigt) hans massiv gældkrise. Men han overvandt hele rodet, og lærte to store lektioner: for det første var, at han kunne slippe af sted med noget som helst.

Bruddet af hans ægteskab med Ivana lærtede Trump,

at han kunne slippe af sted med noget som helst.

For det andet, på den finansielle side, lærte han, at han nu var ”for stor til at gå fallit” – uha!!

han overlevede sin gældkrise, fordi han, ligesom verdens banker i 2008,

nu var blevet ”for stor til at gå fallit”

Interessant! Men du godeste, sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!!

21:00 Vi fortsætter med at se lidt fjernsyn. De viser et gamle afsnit af ”De gode gamle dage”, et tv-program, der prøvede at genskabe stemningen af det gamle vaudeville-teater. Afsnittet blev først sendt den 9. juli 1980, da Lois og jeg var 34 år gamle.

Lois og jeg fik fat i teaterbilletter til en live-forestilling af dette show for 2 måneder siden i byen Leeds, men vi blev desværre nødt til at aflyse billetterne på grund af Lois’s øjenoperation. Teatret sendte os imidlertid en kreditnota, så vi planlægger at besøge Leeds i 2018 og se showet.

Dette afsnits hovedattraktion er sangeren Vince Hill. Lois og jeg er nu blevet to gamle krager, så nyder vi hans gamle søde sange, som for eksempel William Penns ”Du er min gedeblad, jeg er bien” (1901), som Vince synger med en sød følelsemæssig musikal indledning, som vi ikke har hørt før.

”I don’t want to play in your yard

I don’t like you any more

You’ll be sorry when you see me

Swinging on my cellar door

You can’t holler down my rain barrel

You can’t climb my apple tree

I don’t want to play in your yard

If you can’t be good to me”

Lois og jeg kender sangen godt, men ikke

denne søde musikale indledning

Vi er så blødsødne ha ha ha!

22:00 Vi går i seng – zzzzzzzz!!!!!

English translation

09:00 Lois and I spend the morning making sure that our planned vacation in Australia next year can take place and there are no showstoppers. Our daughter Sarah has invited us to visit her family in Perth this spring (Australia's fall) and spend time with them all: including Francis, Sarah's husband, and their 4-year-old twins, Lily and Jessie.

We find out that our neighbors, Frances and Stephen, will be home throughout our absence and can look after our house and manage our mail. And Pussywillows the local cat hotel confirms that they have a vacant cabin for Minx, Alison's Cat, who she left with us 5 years ago when the family moved to Denmark.

The Pussy Willows Cat Hotel has no restaurant but an excellent

room service: all food is served in guests' cabins.

No extra charge for single occupancy ha ha ha!

Poor Minx !!!!!!!!

10:30 We walk into the village and pop into Waghornes, the local butcher's shop, and buy meat and bread. We order a turkey and some bacon for Christmas. We come home.

11:30 We head over to the local Waitrose supermarket and pop into the local Thomas Cook travel agency concession in the supermarket and buy our plane tickets to Australia.

the town's Waitrose supermarket

We get a bit of a pleasant surprise when we hear that a driver will pick us up and drive us to Birmingham Airport and another will drive us from Perth Airport to Sarah's house in the suburb of Leederville or to the family's next house if they move from their current house, although it may be that we have to pay a little extra if the distance is more than 25 miles (45km) from the airport.

12:30 We say goodbye to Rachel, Thomas Cook travel agent's expedition. We are tired and hungry, but we find that the supermarket's restaurant is packed with upmarket people - damn!

Waitrose is the most upmarket of Cheltenham's many supermarkets. Customers tend to be older or relatively wealthy (or both). They tend to block the aisles with their shopping carts because they are not used to noticing other people, but they are very courteous when you say "Excuse me"! My god, what madness !!!!

13:00 We drop the idea of eating in the Waitrose restaurant and drive over to Wyevale Garden Center to have lunch. Both Lois and I feel a little tired - we feel jaded and like a couple of limp rags: it's not every day you spend thousands of pounds just to fly to the other side of the world and back.

Lois orders fishpie and I order beer-battered cod with french fries and peas - yum! We begin to unwind a bit after the morning's tension.

We sit in the shop's cafe and talk a little about our decision not to stay in Dubai on our way to Perth. The first time we visited Sarah (in 2016) we stayed at a hotel near Dubai airport. Our flight from Birmingham arrived at Dubai at 5 o'clock in the afternoon, and we checked into the hotel and tumbled straight into bed. The result was that after we did the 2nd stage of the journey, Dubai at 8 am (local time) to Australia at 5 am next day (local time), we arrived relatively bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in Australia. The timing was perfect, but that particular flight with its 5pm arrival time has unfortunately been withdrawn by the Emirates airline - damn!

That’s basically why we have decided not to stay in Dubai on our way to Perth.

Flashback to April 2016: Lois (above) and I wait outside our hotel

in Dubai for the shuttle bus to the airport.

But there are also other reasons not to stay there. After all the bad press and all the articles we have recently read about how handsome Emirate Arabs are, I'm a little afraid that one of these beautiful men will turn Lois's head. It is only 4 years ago that 3 Emirates men were expelled by Saudi Arabia for being "too sexy" (report, Onion News website). One of them had posted a photo of himself on Facebook wearing eyeliner. Good grief, what madness!

The news source thought for some reason that the Saudi judgment was a little controversial and I remembered that their website asked Lois and me for our personal opinions, something that doesn't happen every day - no doubt about that! We felt rather honored and we discussed the arguments on both sides without reaching a firm conclusion.

Fortunately, a representative selection of readers of the news source had contributed a range of interesting views, for example (1) "Good riddance!" (Arthur Ettel, Capacitor Assembler), (2) "The exact same thing happened to me but instead of being too sexy, they said I was too violent "(James Fearing, system analyst), and" I think men actually look sexiest when they're not wearing makeup and are just being themselves "(Donnamarie Post , torch solderer).

We decide that we lean towards the third and last point of view, which Donnamarie Post expresses. I recognize her face, but I'm not sure I remember her name. I suspect, at least, that we have seen her statements before in Onion News, and we like her style. She seems to change jobs frequently, and often takes on the kinds of jobs that require highly skilled work, but it seems she can master them very quickly - she is certainly versatile, no doubt about that. Kudos, Donna!

Donnamarie Post: we like her style!

18:00 We have dinner and spend the rest of the evening watching television. The third part of a 4-part interesting documentary series is on, all about Trump's rise to power.

This third episode is about Trump in the late 1980s and early 1990s, starting with perhaps his greatest crisis period: the break-up of his marriage to Ivana, and (at the same time) his massive debt crisis. But he overcame the whole mess and learnt two major lessons: the first was that he could get away with anything.

The break-up of his marriage with Ivana taught Trump

that he could get away with anything.

Secondly, on the financial side, he learned that he was now "too big to fail" - oh dear!!

he survived his debt crisis because like the world's banks in 2008,

he now had become "too big to fail"

Interesting! But my god, what a crazy world we live in !!!!

21:00 We continue to watch television. An old episode of "The Good Old Days" is on, a television program that tried to recreate the mood of the old vaudeville theater. The episode was first aired on July 9, 1980, when Lois and I were 34.

Lois and I got theater tickets for a live performance of this show 2 months ago in Leeds, but unfortunately we had to cancel the tickets because of Lois's eye surgery. The theater, however, sent us a credit note, so we plan to visit Leeds in 2018 and see the show.

This episode's main attraction is the singer Vince Hill. Lois and I have now become two real old crows, so we enjoy his old sweet songs, such as Willliam Penn’s "You Are My Honeysuckle I am the Bee" (1901), which Vince sings with a sweet emotional musical introduction, which we have not heard before.

"I don't want to play in your yard

I don't like you any more

You'll be sorry when you see me

Swinging on my cellar door

You can't holler down my rain barrel

You can't climb my apple tree

I don't want to play in your yard

If you can't be good to me "