Monday 22 July 2019

10:00 I go out in the backyard and cut back one of our many giant hedges - the one that grows at the bottom of the garden on our late neighbour Bill's side.

flashback to July 7 - I decide to dedicate today (July 22) to cutting back one of our many

giant hedges growing at the bottom of the garden (see the red circle)

I do the job, but I decide to leave all the clipped branches on the lawn for the time being - I will gather them up on Wednesday and stuff them in our brown garden waste bin when the council  has emptied it:  Wednesday every other week is the council’s  collection day for waste and garden waste.

 the giant hedge I’ve managed to cut back

a difficult task, but I manage to keep smiling, which is the most important thing

I come back into the house and Lois and I relax with a coffee on the couch. Afterwards, Lois goes for a short walk on the local football field. I think about joining her, but I'm a little tired after my gardening, so I settle down on the couch and have a cup of coffee.

A local man, Theodore Sperling, recently hit the world’s headlines when, for a short time, he considered going for a walk, but changed his mind for a mixed bag of reasons: I recall that at that time I sympathized with him, when I saw Theodore's story, which was the first item on the day’s tv news (source: the Onion).

The notion of aerobic exercise momentarily flashed through the mind of area office manager Theodore Sperling Monday. "There was half an hour to kill before Monday evening football," Sperling said, "and I thought for a few seconds that I could maybe go for a walk around the block."

But after getting off the couch, Sperling instead went to the kitchen in search of the remains of the pork chops from the evening dinner and returned to the living room where he briefly surfed the channels before deciding on a Game Show Network re-run of Match Game '75 .

I recall that "Sperling-gate", as the case came to be called, dominated the week's news, and was discussed endlessly on news magazine programmes and talk shows, etc., which seems excessive, but it’s possible  it was just a "slow news week" - I can't quite remember.

My god, what a crazy world we live in !!!!

12:00 We have lunch and afterwards we go to bed for a couple of hours. We get up at 3 pm and we start to search through all the unwanted bedding I collected yesterday in the attic - bedding which we long ago decided to store in the attic for reasons that are now not completely clear, to put it mildly .

15:30 Our “unwanted bedding committee” is now in session – part of our current downsizing mini-project.

We decide to keep the duvet and maybe offer it to Alison, our daughter in Haslemere, Surrey. We will donate that huge cushion to our usual charity shop and the brand new sleeping bag to "refugees in the third world" via Lois's sect. The huge pillow and the other small cushions I throw in the wheelie bin. We want to keep the pillow covers - Lois will sew up the ones that are torn. "Simples"!

All resolutions adopted unanimously by the “committee” – ha ha ha!

flashback to yesterday: the unwanted bedding I came across in the attic

The so-called "unwanted bedding" issue has actually proved to be relatively simple - there was far less bedding than I expected when I ransacked the attic yesterday, which was nice. A much more serious problem is the clothes themselves, including baby clothes, which we have lots of big black plastic bags of - but that will have to wait for another day - damn!

flashback to yesterday: the sacks of unwanted clothes I found in the ceiling -

good grief, what madness !!!!

16:00 My sister Gill in Cambridge calls me on whatsapp. Coincidentally, two of her 3 daughters (Zoe, Lucy and Maria) have broken bones at the moment. Zoe fell over and stubbed and broke her toe. Maria was climbing the highest mountain of Scotland, Ben Nevis, when she fell over and broke her collar bone. My god, what madness !!!

Zoe and her partner Chris have just bought, and moved into, their first house, in the town of Cheadle, a little outside Manchester, and Lucy has now qualified as a lawyer in the town of Ipswich, and she is considering buying an apartment in the town. Maria and Tom are busy managing their dynamic financial jobs in London and planning their wedding in April - yikes, busy busy busy!

Gill is currently writing her life story primarily for the benefit of her 3 daughters, initially only covering the years 1960-68, when my parents, my siblings and I lived in the city of Bristol. Gill has collected a lot of photos which are likely to help stimulate her memory. And she's starting this week on taking a creative writing course in her spare time, which is also likely to help her. I look forward to reading her little book when it's finished, no doubt about that.

Flashback to the 1960’s: me and Gill on the beach

Gill with my other sister Kathy in the backyard of our house in Bristol

Me and Gill: we photograph each other

17:00 The call with Gill ends and I go out into the backyard to carry on cutting back my current giant hedge - the part that overhangs our “rhubarb area”, so first and foremost I have to be careful not to step on any of our rhubarb plants - yikes!

18:00 We have dinner and spend the rest of the evening watching a bit of television. University Challenge is on, a TV quiz in which 4-person teams from various British universities compete over several months to win the quiz's famous trophy.

"University Challenge" is one of the few television programmes that are not suitable for very stupid people ha ha ha. This evening's 2 teams are Merton College Oxford and Corpus Christi College Cambridge. The programme presenter is the charming Jeremy Paxman.

Lois and I are always the most happy about the questions that we can answer, but with which all the fresh young brains strike out on, because we believe it proves that we are not yet suffering from dementia. And tonight, our performance is relatively good, I have tosay. We both find that tonight there are 5 questions that one or other of us can answer, which the 8 young brains are completely confused about, which is nice.

They are both very good teams, no doubt about that, and I wouldn't be surprised if one or the other of them becomes the season's winning team in a few months’ time, but we'll see.

Lois and I are surprised, however, tonight, when both teams fail to answer this easy question:  “To what legendary device do the following lines of John Dryden refer?”.

”And, by Minerva’s aid a fabric reared,

which like a steed of monstrous height appeared.

The sides were planked with pine.

They feigned it for their return,

And this the vow they paid.”

The answer seems quite easy in mine and Lois's eyes, but it is true that we are just a couple of old crows,  we have to admit. Although not so old that we were alive when the Trojan war was raging, I have to say. We missed that war by 3-4,000 years, although sometimes it doesn't feel like it - yikes!

22:00 We go to bed in a good mood - zzzzzzzzzz !!!!!

Danish translation

10:00 Jeg går ud I baghaven og afskære én af vores mange kæmpehække – den, der gror i bunden af haven på vores afdøde nabo Bills side.

tilbageblik til den 7. juli – jeg beslutter at afskære i dag (den 22. juli) én  af vores mange

kæmpe-hække, der gror i bunden af haven (se den røde cirkel)

Jeg klarer arbejdet, men jeg beslutter at efterlade alle de klippede grene på græsplanen for tiden – jeg vil samle dem på onsdag og proppe dem i vores brune haveaffaldsspand, når kommunen har tømt den: onsdag hver 2 uger er kommunens indsamlingsdag til affald og haveaffald.

den kæmpe-hæk, det har lykkes mig at afskære

en vanskelig opgave, men jeg formår at fortsætte med at smile, hvilket er det vigtigste

Jeg kommer tilbage i huset og Lois og jeg slapper af med en op kaffe i sofaen. Bagefter går Lois en kort tur på den lokale fodboldbane. Jeg overvejer at gå med, men jeg er lidt træt efter mit havearbejde, så jeg sætter mig til rette i sofaen og drikker en kop kaffe.

En lokal mand, Theodore Sperling, ramte verdens overskrifter for nylig, da han i en kort tid overvejede at gå en tur, men skiftede mening af en blandt landhandel af grunde: jeg mindes om, at jeg på det tidspunkt sympatiserede med ham, da jeg så Theodores historie, der var det første indslag på dagens tv-nyheder (kilde: Onion News).

Forestillingen om aerobisk øvelse dukkede momentan op i sindet af områdekontorchef Theodore Sperling mandag. "Der var en halv time at dræbe før mandag aftenfodbold," sagde Sperling, "og jeg tænkte i et par sekunder, at jeg måske skulle gå en tur rundt om blokken."

Efter at have rettet sig fra sofaen gik Sperling i stedet i køkkenet på jagt efter resterne af svinekoteletter fra aftensmiddagen og vendte tilbage til stuen, hvor han kort kanal-surfede, før han besluttede sig på en Game Show Network-genudsendelse af Match Game '75 .

Jeg mindes om, at ”Sperling-gate”, som sagen kom til at blive kaldet, dominerede ugens nyheder, og blev diskuteret i en uendelighed på nyhedsmagasiner-programmer og talk-shows osv, men det er muligt, det var en ”langsomnyhedsuge”- jeg kan ikke helt huske.

Du godeste, sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!!

12:00 Vi spiser frokost og bagefter går vi i seng i et par timer. Vi står op kl 15 og vi går i gang med at søge igennem alle de uønskede sengetøj jeg samlede i går i loftet – sengetøj, som vi for længe siden besluttede at gemme i loftet af grunde, der ikke er helt klar, for at sige mildt.

15:30 Vores uønskede sengetøj-udvalget nu i session. Vi beslutter at beholde dynen og måske tilbyde den til Alison, vores datter i Haslemere, Surrey. Den kæmpe-pude vil vi donere til vores sædvanlige velgørenhedsbutik. Den spritnye sovepose vil vi donere til ”flygtninge i den tredje verden” ved hjælp af Lois’ sekt. Den kæmpe hovedpude og de andre små puder smider jeg i affaldsspanden. Vi vil beholde pudebetrækkene  – Lois vil sy sammen dém, der er revnet. "Simples" ! Vedtaget enstemmigt ha ha!

tilbageblik til i går: det sengetøj jeg faldt over i loftet

Det såkaldte ”sengetøj-spørgsmål” er faktisk forholdsvis  simpelt – der var langt mindre sengetøj, end jeg forventede, da jeg i går ransagede loftet, hvilket var rart. Et meget mere alvorligt problem er selve tøjet, inklusive babytøjet, som vi har masser af store sorte plastiksække med – men det bliver en anden dag – pokkers!

tilbageblik til i går: de sække af uønskede tøj, jeg fandt i loftet -

du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!!

16:00 Min søster Gill i Cambridge ringer til mig på whatsapp. Tilfældigvis har to af hendes 3 døtre (Zoe, Lucy og Maria) brækkede knogler for tiden. Zoe faldt omkuld, og stødte og brækkede sin tå. Maria var i gang med at klatre Skotlands højeste berg, Ben Nevis, da hun faldt omkuld og brækkede sit kraveben. Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!

Zoe og hendes partner Chris har købt deres første hus, i byen Cheadle, lidt udenfor Manchester, og Lucy har nu kvalificeret som advokat i byen Ipswich, og hun overvejer at købe en lejlighed i byen. Maria og Tom er beskæftigede med at klare deres dynamiske financielle jobs i London og med at planlægge deres bryllup til april – yikes, travlt travlt travlt!

17:00 Opkaldet med Gill slutter, og jeg går ud i baghaven for at fortsætte med at afskære min nuværende kæmpehæk – den del, der overhænger vores rabarber-område, så først og fremmest må jeg være forsigtig, så jeg ikke træder på vores rabarber planter – yikes!

Gill er for tiden i gang med at skrive sin livshistorie først og fremmest til fordel for sine 3 døtre, i begyndelsen bare hvad angår årene 1960-68, da mine forældre og mine søskende boede i byen Bristol. Hun har samlet en masse fotoer, hvilket sandsynligvis vil hjælpe med at stimulere sin hukommelse. Og hun er i gang denne uge med at tage en creative writing-kursus i sin fritid, hvilket også sandsynligvis vil hjælpe hende. Jeg glæder mig meget til at læse sin lille bog, når den er færdig, ingen tvivl om det.

Tilbageblik til 1960’erne: mig og Gill på stranden

Gill med min anden søster Kathy i baghaven af vores hus i Bristol

Mig og Gill: vi fotograferer hinanden

18:00 Vi spiser aftensmad og bruger resten af aftenen på at se lidt fjernsyn. De viser University Challenge,  en tv-quiz, hvor 4-personer-hold fra forskellige britiske universiter dyster over flere måneder, for at vinde quizzens berømte pokal. ”University Challenge” er ét af de få tv-programmer, der ikke er egnede til meget dumme mennesker ha ha ha. Aftenens 2 hold er Merton College Oxford og Corpus Christi College Cambridge. Programmets vært er den charmerende Jeremy Paxman.

Lois og jeg er altid glad for de spørgsmål, som vi kan besvare, men som alle de friske unge hjerner har problemer med, fordi vi tror det beviser, at vi selv ikke endnu lider af demens. Og i aften er vores præstation forholdsvis god – det må jeg nok sige. Vi finder begge to, at der i aften er 5 spørgsmål som vi hver kan svare på, som de 8 unge hjerner er helt perplekse over, hvilket er rart.

De er begge to meget gode hold, ingen tvivl om det, og jeg ville ikke være overrasket, hvis det ene eller det andet bliver til sæsonens vindende hold om nogle måneders tid, men vi får se.

Lois og jeg bliver overrasket imidlertid i aften, da det mislykkes begge hold at svare dette lette spørgsmål: til hvilket legendarisk apparat henviser de følgende linjer skrevet af John Dryden –

”And, by Minerva’s aid a fabric reared,

which like a steed of monstrous height appeared.

The Sides were planked with pine.

They feigned it made for their return,

And this the vow they paid”

Svaret synes nemt i mine og Lois’ øjne, men det er sandt, at vi er et par gamle krager – det må vi indrømme. Selvom ikke så gamle, at vi levede, da den trojanske krig hærgede – det må jeg nok sige. Vi gik glip af den med 3-4.000 år, selvom det nogle gange ikke synes som om det – yikes!

22:00 Vi går i seng i godt humør – zzzzzzzzzz!!!!!