Thursday November 21 2019

04:30 Lois and I wake up early and I read about 20 pages of my bedtime book. Afterwards I decide to crawl out of bed and down the stairs, and sit down with the computer. Lois finally gets back to sleep and I bring two cups of tea up to the bedroom at 8 o’clock. We stay lying in bed, drinking tea and talking for a bit.

09:00 We roll out of bed and start clearing up and vacuuming all over the house because our U3A Danish group is holding its regular fortnightly meeting here this afternoon, and we don't want members to realizse that Lois and I live like pigs most of the time, which is the honest unvarnished truth, I'm afraid to say.

After putting things back in order, we settle down with Anna Grue's Danish crime novel, "The Further You Fall," which is the group's current project, and we read the next 5 pages - we have noticed that the group can only cope with 5 pages during our meetings. The group’s method at meetings is that we take turns reading half a page and then translate it into English.

Anna Grue's Danish crime novel, "Deep to fall",

which is our U3A Danish group's current project

Although the group meetings last 90 minutes, in the final analysis we are just a bunch of old crows with bad memories, and on top of that there is always a lot of chit-chat going on about the good old days, about aches and pains, about holidays and grandchildren, so I think it’s actually to our  credit that we get to read as many as 5 pages, when it comes to it - yikes !!!!

11:00 Lois and I relax with a cup of coffee on the couch. I take a look at my smartphone and I see that Alison, our daughter in Haslemere, has pointed us to the website run by her 2 older children’s youth club where the girls go every Friday night.

Rosalind, our 11-year-old granddaughter, dressed in black in the foreground,

at a meeting of the local youth club

Josie our 13 year old granddaughter sitting and waving

a piece of paper in front of the face, during a meeting of the club

I feel a little jealous of Josie and Rosalind - I have to say. My mother had the habit of banning me and my siblings from participating in such activities in the evening, which was a bit of a shame. For some reason, she wanted to shield us from all possible dangers, however, unlikely, and the best way to be sure of that was to keep us all at home as much as possible – good grief, what madness!

12:00 Lois and I have lunch and afterwards I go to bed and take a short afternoon nap. I get up at 2 pm and prepare for our Danish group meeting. Members ring at the door at 2:30 pm and we study Danish for an hour and a half, although most of the time we are just chatting in English about this and that.

We talk about wedding presents. I tell them about the site my niece Maria and her long-time partner Tom have set up in connection with their forthcoming wedding (April 2020). The couple moved in together many years ago, so they do not need the traditional gifts: toasters, fancy porcelain, electric blankets and the like.

my niece Maria with her partner Tom: a recent picture

On their website, the couple write: Shortly after our wedding in Granary Estates, we fly out for a month's trip to New Zealand with a short stopover in Thailand on the way.

After a few days of pampering in Thailand, we head to Queenstown for some extreme sports (parachuting and bungee jumping!). We plan to enjoy the beautiful Milford Sounds before working our way north, to finish in Auckland.

On the way we will be mostly visiting vineyards, glaciers and mountain ranges, with a stop in Hobbiton for a pint of beer in the Green Dragon pub!

Wedding guests can choose to contribute money to one or the other of the couple's activities, hotel stays, excursions, etc. Lois and I decided to choose now, so we won't forget - after all, we are just two old crows who have never practised extreme sports to put it mildly! We chose a boat trip through the Waitomo caves of New Zealand, caves where thousands of glow worms live and glow in the dark. It sounds magical, we have to say.

typical scenes from a boat trip in the Waitomo Caves

Joy, one of our Danish group members, says she remembers the time when people gave much cheaper things, such as a toast-rack or similar. Also, the gifts were usually a surprise to the couple, and there was no cooperation or consultation between guests: and Lois recalls that when we got married, a lot of our guests gave us towels, so we came away with piles and piles of them - and we are still using some of them today, after 47 years – my god, what madness !!!

Joy also comments that she and Dave have been visited by their son and his wife. Their son is very into ironing - he likes to iron his shirts in particular, so he looks good in his office. His wife - Joy and Dave's daughter-in-law - never irons anything, but she works long hours: she is a consultant at the John Radcliffe Hospital, Oxford, although the couple live in the London area.

During this recent visit, their son complained about Joy and Dave's ironing board, which they have had since they got married - he said there was asbestos in the plate where you put the iron down during breaks when you're not ironing. He persuaded Joy and Dave to buy a new one, and throw out the old one, although Dave just hid it in the garage - he hasn't thrown it out quite yet.

Lois rushes into the utility room and comes back with our own 46-year-old ironing board, and the group tries to determine if it has asbestos in it or not, but we're not quite sure: the jury is still out on that one. Joy says you have to be careful about throwing something away if it contains asbestos. We need to do some research on the web - damn it, what a nuisance!

our 47-year-old ironing board, standing peacefully where we usually store it  -

in the utility room next to the freezer.

16:00 The meeting ends and the members leave. Lois and I relax with a cup of tea and a biscuit on the couch. We are completely exhausted, as always after a "Danish" day:  clean-up and general physical work in the morning and brain work and chit-chat in the afternoon - yikes! We're getting old, no doubt about that !!!

18:00 We have dinner - sausages, mashed potatoes and Brussels sprouts (yum yum!) and spend the rest of the evening watching some television. 

Lois wants to see a movie, "Table 19", a funny comedy about a group of wedding guests sitting at the "singles table" for a wedding reception - they don't know each other, and don't seem to have anything in common. But they all turn out to have some grudge or other against the bride and groom, it seems, and the group slowly starts to bond with each other.

And Stephen Merchant, who we think is very funny, plays one of the lead roles, plus Lisa Kudrow from the old sitcom "Friends", but unfortunately I can't keep my eyes open - zzzzzz !!! Lois wakes me up at 9 pm when the movie is over.

Stephen Merchant always looks a bit out of place, wherever he is. A bit like me, perhaps.

Damn !!!!

21:00 We continue to watch some television, an interesting documentary about the Sainsbury’s supermarket chain.

Lois and I do not usually look at this kind of programme, but tonight we make an exception because we are a little afraid of the growth of technology in supermarkets. We always avoid using the self-check-out machines in our local Sainsbury’s and Tesco supermarkets: we think it's not our responsibility to do this work, and we don't mind queuing occasionally for a human cashier - we're retired and have tons of time, and enjoy chatting with the ones we know.

A London mini-Sainsbury's supermarket recently experimented with removing all their manned checkout tills, and then persuading customers who entered the store to download a special app onto their smartphones and use the app to register and pay for everything they bought.

But unfortunately so many potential customers decided immediately to step out of the store and shop somewhere else, that the manager was eventually forced to reopen a "secret manned check-out" in some dark corner of the store, where of course a long queue formed: and during the day, 75% of the store's sales were made through the "secret checkout", without the use of the app at all - ha!

These supermarket bosses must be insane! Lois and I could have foreseen that this would be the result of the experiment - it's not rocket science ha ha ha!

Also I would have concerns about whether I’ve got enough space on my smartphone for yet one more app - I am already always getting warnings that I have too much on it.

And how many hands do you need to hold the phone and click on it, as well as handling all  your purchases, and anything else you might be carrying?  Madness!!!!!

A long queue forms the store's "secret" manned checkout -

in the queue are the majority of the customers, who do not want to download the app

and bother to learn how to use it. My god, what madness !!!

And people say there aren’t usually any queues in this store !!!

Also in the programme we see the opening of a new mini-Sainsburys in Shadwell, a small suburb of Leeds. The chain’s board of directors commission a lot of research before the store opens, to decide which products to concentrate on in-store, and the like. Unfortunately, the researchers do not notice that the store is located in the city's Jewish Quarter and they fail to stock any kosher foods. On the store’s first day, the scale of this disaster becomes quite clear, to put it mildly!

Back to the drawing board ha ha ha! But Lois and I wonder if these days, information about an area’s  religions and ethnicities, etc., cannot be obtained on the web because of political correctness. What a crazy world we live in !!!!

Anyway it's nice to see the Queen meet with one of the chain's longest-serving employees, Jenny, who has worked on Sainsbury's checkouts for 50 years: she started in 1979 when she took a "temporary" job in her local store.

And Lois and I have the chance to admire the Queen once again - how wonderful she is, at the age of 93, when she visits somewhere, attending one special event after another, smiling and talking with everyone she meets. This occasion is the Sainsbury’s chain's 150th anniversary.

She puts our pathetic politicians to shame !!!!

Sainsbury's CEO presents Jenny to the Queen ..

... and Jenny comes up with a suitable funny reply

The occasion gets a lot  of press coverage, which pleases the chain.

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzzz !!!!!

Danish translation: torsdag den 21. november 2019

04:30 Lois og jeg vågner tidligt og jeg læser omkring 20 sider af min sengetidbog og bagefter beslutter jeg at krybe ud af sengen og ned ad trappen for at sætte mig med computeren. Lois falder omsider tilbage i søvn, og jeg bringer to kopper te op på soveværelse kl 8. Vi blive liggende i sengen, drikke téen og snakker lidt.

09:00 Vi vælter ud af sengen og går i gang med at rydde op og støvsuge overalt i huset, fordi vores U3A danske gruppe holder sit regelmæssige fjortendagsmøde i eftermiddag hos os, og vi vil ikke have at medlemmer indser, at Lois og jeg lever ligesom svine det meste af tid, hvilket er den ærlige usminkede sandhed, er jeg bange for at sige.

Efter at vi har ført tingene tilbage til orden, sætter vi os til rette med Anna Grues krimiroman, ”Dybt at falde”, som er gruppens nuværende projekt, og vi læser de næste 5 sider – vi har bemærket, at gruppen kun kan hamle op med 5 sider under vores møder. Vores metode er at vi skiftes til at læse en halvside og oversætte den så til engelsk.

Anna Grues danske krimiroman, ”Dybt at falde”,

som er vores U3A danske gruppes nuværende projekt

Selvom gruppens møder varer 90 minutter, er vi der i den sidste analyse bare en bundt gamle krager med dårlige hukommelser, og oven i købet er der altid en masse snik-snak om de gamle gode dage, om ømhed og smerter, om ferier og børnebørn, så synes jeg, det tjener os til ære, at vi når at læse så mange som 5 sider, når det kommer til stykket - yikes!!!!

11:00 Vi slapper af med en kop kaffe i sofaen. Jeg kigger lidt på min smartphone og jeg ser, at Alison, vores datter i Haslemere har påpeget webstedet af sine 2 ældre børns ungdomsklub, hvor pigerne går hver fredag aften.

Rosalind, vores 11-årige barnebarn, klædt i sort i forgrunden,

på et møde af sin lokale ungdomsklub

Josie vores 13-årige barnebarn, der sidder og vifter med 

et stykke papir foran ansigtet, under et møde af klubben

Jeg føler mig lidt jaloux på Josie og Rosalind – det må jeg nok sige. Min mor havde for vane af forbyde mig og mine søskende at deltage i sådanne aktiviter om aftenen, hvilket var lidt af en skam. Af en eller anden grund ville hun have at vi aldrig mødte de mindste farer, og den bedste måde at sikre det der på, var at holde os alle hjemme så vidt som muligt – du godeste, sikke et vanvid!

12:00 Lois og jeg spiser frokost og bagefter går jeg i seng for at tage en kort eftermiddagslur. Jeg står op kl 14 og forbereder mig på vores danske gruppemøde. Medlemmer ringer på døren kl 14:30 og vi studerer dansk i en time og en halv, selvom størstedelen af tiden snakker vi på engelsk om dette og hint.

Vi snakker om bryllupsgaver. Jeg fortæller dem om det websted, min niece Maria og hendes langvarige partner Tom har oprettet i forbindelsen med deres kommende bryllup (april 2020). De flyttede ind sammen for mange år siden, så har de ikke brug for de traditionelle gaver:   toastere, porcelæn, varmetæpper og lignende.

Maria og Tom: et nyligt billede

På deres websted skriver parret: Kort efter vores bryllup i Granary Estates flyver vi ud til en måneds tur i New Zealand med en kort stopover i Thailand på vej.

Efter et par dages forkælelse i Thailand er vi på vej til Queenstown for nogle ekstremsport (faldskærmsudspring og bungeejumping!) Vi planlægger at nyde de smukke Milford Sounds, inden vi arbejder vores vej nordpå for at afslutte i Auckland.

På vejen besøger vi vinmarker, gletschere og bjergkæder med et stop i Hobbiton for en pint øl i Green Dragon-pubben !

Bryllupsgæster kan vælge at bidrage med penge til én eller anden af parrets aktiviteter, hotelophold, udflugter osv. Lois og jeg beslutter at vælge nu, så vi ikke glemmer – vi er trods alt bare to gamle krager, der aldrig har dyrket ekstremsport, for at sige mildt! Vi vælger en bådetur gennem Waitomo-hulerne i New Zealand, huler, hvor tusindvis af sankthansorme lever og lyser i mørket. Det lyder magisk, det må vi nok sige.

typiske scener fra en bådetur i Waitomo-hulerne

Joy, én af vores danske gruppemedlemmer, siger hun kan huske dengang, at folk gav meget billigere ting, som for eksempel en brødholder eller lignende. Også gaverne var normalt en overraskelse for parret, og der var ingen medarbejde eller samråd mellem gæster: og Lois mindes om, at da vi giftede os, mange gæster gav os håndklæder, så fik vi bunkevis og bunkevis af dem – og vi bruger nogle af dem stadig i dag, efter 47 år – du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!

Joy siger også, hun og Dave har haft besøg af deres søn og hans kone. Deres søn går højt op i strygning – han kan godt lide at stryge sine skjorter i særdeleshed, så han ser god ud i sit kontor. Hans kone – Joy og Daves svigedatter – stryger aldrig noget, men hun arbejder lange timer: hun er overlæge i John Radcliffe Hospital, Oxford, selvom parret bor i London-området.

Under dette nylige besøg klagede deres søn over Joy og Daves strygebræt, som de har haft siden de giftede sig – han sagde, der er eternit i pladen, hvor man sætter strygejernet ned i pauserne, når du stryger ikke. Han overtalte Joy og Dave at købe et nyt, og smide det gamle ud, selvom Dave bare gemte det i garagen – han har ikke smedt det helt ud endnu.

Lois skynder sig ud i bryggerset og kommer tilbage med vores eget 46-årige strygebræt, og gruppen prøver at afgøre, om det har eternit derinde, eller ej, men vi er ikke helt sikre: juryen er stadig ude om det. Joy siger, man skal være forsigtig over, hvordan man smider noget væk, hvis det indeholder eternit. Vi må gøre lidt forskning på nettet – pokkers!

vores 47-årige strygebræt, stående roligt hvor vi plejer at gemme det,

i bryggerset ved siden af fryseren.

16:00 Mødet slutter og medlemmerne skal af sted. Lois og jeg slapper af med en kop te og en kiks i sofaen. Vi er helt udmattede, som altid efter en ”dansk” dag:  oprydning og generelt fysisk arbejde  i formiddagen og hjernearbejde og snik-snak om eftermiddagen – yikes! Vi bliver gamle, ingen tvivl om det!!!

18:00 Vi spiser afensmad – pølser, kartoffelmos og rosenkål (yum yum!) og bruger resten af aftenen på at se lidt fjernsyn. Lois har lyst til at se en film, ”Table 19”, en morsom komedie, der handler om en gruppe bryllupsgæster der sidder omkring”singles-bordet” til en bryllupsreception – de kender ikke hinanden, og virker ikke at have noget til fælles med hinanden. Men de har alle én eller anden horn i siden mod bruden og brudgommen, lader det til, og gruppen starter langsomt at knytte sig til hinanden.

Og Stephen Merchant, som vi synes er meget morsom, spiller én af hovedrollerne, også Lisa Kudrow fra sitcommen ”Venner”, men desværre kan jeg ikke holde mine øjnene åbne – zzzzzz!!!  Lois vækker mig kl 21, da filmen er slut.

Pokkers!!!!

Stephen Merchant ser altid lidt ”uden for billedet” ud, uanset hvor han er. Lidt som mig, måske.

21:00 Vi fortsætter med at se lidt fjernsyn, en interessant dokumentarfilm om Sainsburys-supermarkedkæden.

Lois og jeg plejer ikke at se på denne slags program, men i aften gør vi en undtagelse, fordi vi er lidt bange for væksten i teknologi i supermarkeder. Vi undgår altid at bruge selvcheckoutmaskinerne i vores lokale Sainsburys- og Tesco-supermarkeder: vi synes, det er ikke vores ansvar at lave dette arbejde, og vi har ikke noget imod at stå i køer af og til – vi er pensionerede og har tonsvis af tid ha ha ha!

Et mini-Sainsburys-supermarked i London eksperimenterede for nylig med at fjerne alle deres kasseapparater, og overtale kunder, der trådte ind i butikken, at downloade en speciel app på deres smartphones og bruge appen til at registrere, og betale for, alt dét, de købte.

Men desværre besluttede så mange potentielle kunder at tråde straks ud af butikken igen og shoppe i en eller anden anderledes butik, at manageren omsider blev tvunget til at genåbne et ”hemmeligt kasseapparat” i ét eller andet mørke hjørne i butikken, hvor selvfølgelig en lang kø formede sig: og i løbet af dagen var 75% af butikkens salg foretaget gennem det der ”hemmelige kasseapparat”, uden brugen af appen – ha!

Disse supermarked-cheffer må være sindssyge! Lois og jeg kunne have forudset, at dette ville være eksperimentets resultat – det er ikke raketvidenskab ha ha ha!

Selv ville jeg har bekymringer om plads på min smartphone til endnu én app - jeg bliver altid advaret, at jeg allerede har for meget på den.

En lang kø former sig til butikkens eneste ”hemmelige” kasseapparat –

bestående af flertallet af kunder, der ikke har lyst til at downloade appen.

Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!

Og folk siger, der normalt ikke er nogle køer i butikken!!!

Også i programmet ser vi åbningen af en ny mini-Sainsburys i Shadwell, en lille forstad til byen Leeds. Selskabets bestyrelse får en masse forskning gjort før butikken åbner, for at afgøre hvilke produkter at koncentrere sig om i butikken, og den slags. Desværre lægger bestyrelsen ikke mærke til, at butikken ligger i byens jødiske kvarter, og de undlader at føre nogle kosher-fødevarer. På butikkens første dag bliver skalaen af denne katastrofe helt klar, for at sige mildt! Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!!

Tilbage til tegnebrættet ha ha ha! Men Lois og jeg spekulerer på, om man nu om dage ikke kan få information om et områdes religioner og etniske grupper osv, på grund af politisk korrekthed. Sikke en skør verden vi lever i!!!!

Men det er rart at se dronningen mødes med en af kædens mest langvarige medarbejder, Jenny, der har arbejdet på Sainsburys-kasseapparater i 50 år: hun startede i 1979, da hun tog et ”midlertidligt” job i sin lokale butik.

Lois og jeg har chancen for at beundre dronningen endnu en gang – hvor vidunderlig hun er, på 93 år, når hun besøger, og deltager i den ene special andledning efter den anden, smile til og snakke lidt med alle, hun møder. Denne anledning er Sainsburys-kædens 150 års jubilæum.

Hun får vores elendige politikere at skamme sig!!!!

Sainsbury-kædens administrerende direktø præsenterer Jenny for dronningen..

...og Jenny kommer med en passende morsom replik til dronningen

Der er en masse pressedækning af jubilæet, hvilket behager kæden.

22:00 Vi går i seng – zzzzzzzz!!!!!