Danskcolin: Wednesday 10 January 2018

09:15 Lois and I head over to Bishops Cleeve, a small town located 3 miles north of Cheltenham, to shop at the local Tesco supermarket and pick up the 12 electric bulbs we ordered from the local hardware retailer.

Four years ago, we had 6 modern ceiling mounted fixtures installed in the bathroom, and unfortunately, 5 of the bulbs are now burned out. The proprietor's owner recently told me that these kinds of bulbs are no longer manufactured. My god, what madness !!!! So that's why I decided to order 12 new bulbs, and hopefully we will not need more than 12, before we die or move somewhere else.

On our way to Bishops Cleeve, we swing by the local post office and buy 3 children's magazines, 2 copies of "Art" magazine and a "Star Wars" magazine for sending to our grandchildren in Copenhagen.

It all costs a fortune including postage - my god! But both of us are happy to do them this little service and keep our grandchildren in touch with the "old country".

the children's magazines we have bought for our grandchildren

in Copenhagen, to keep them in touch with "the old country"

12:00 We have lunch and afterwards, Jeff, our plumber, rings at the door. He gets going on servicing our gas boiler in the kitchen and the gas fire in the living room. After an hour he leaves, and we pay him (£78). I go to bed and take a giant afternoon nap.

15:30 I get up and relax with a cup of tea and a piece of Christmas cake. I sit down in front of the computer. Our U3A Danish group is holding its next meeting tomorrow afternoon, so I get started preparing a vocabulary test I want them to have a go at.

I usually choose a Danish proverb or quotation with a topical interest, and arrange the test so the correct answers spell out that proverb or quote.

I find 4 Danish proverbs referring to the month of January:

January freezes the pot on the fire.

If the grass grows in January, the summer meadows will be bare.

The blackest month in a year is January.

A wet January, a wet spring.

All useful knowledge, and good to know! I choose the third one for my test because it is dead simple and I imagine our group members will not have any trouble understanding it. I'm so warmhearted ha ha ha!

I think the members of the group are keen to learn Danish proverbs, although they are, like proverbs in all languages, quite bland and are very like similar proverbs in other languages. But they are also comforting and they are often used in advertising, I have noticed.

But one must be careful about proverbs - a local advertising manager, Patrick Bergman, was recently criticized for authorizing the use of an inappropriate proverb "Haste makes waste" in an advertisement urging people to hurry to a 12-hour bed linen sale at a local department store (report October 6, 2004, source - Onion Local).

"Who cares about all that?" Bergman told local reporters. "People know the proverb and they respond to it." But that's something Lois and I are not quite sure about. We recall that we missed the bed linen sale due to the "mixed message" in the advertisement, a failure that probably cost us a small fortune, no doubt. What madness !!!!

16:30 I take a little look online. I find Morten Ingemann's latest comic strip. My goodness! I get a bit of a shock.

The Dane, Ingemann, is my favorite cartoonist - no doubt about that! He is especially interested in ugly, overweight, middle aged or older people, the kind of people rarely given attention by most cartoonists.

The Dane, Morten Ingemann, my favorite cartoonist

Ingemann is one of my most important sources when it comes to understanding Danish society. But today I think he is highlighting a problem that transcends national borders and affects all those who have poor eyesight. But very often also Ingemann can shed light on two or more problems in the same story line, which is great.

People across the globe are finding that their eyesight is deteriorating, no doubt about it. In Britain, 61% of the population wear glasses or contact lenses (according to a survey in 2012): the statistics were only 57% in 2001.

In Denmark, approx. 60% of the Danish population over 12 years of age wear glasses. As impaired vision often increases with age, this figure rises in the older section of the population, so that it's 80% of Danes over 40 years of age who wear glasses, and 92% of Danes over 60 years of age.

In Ingemann's cartoon strip today we see two ugly middle-aged women chatting to each other in a snow-covered park. One asks the other how it's going with Palle, a middle-aged guy she has just met. The other women say Palle is okay, but he has a "mega bad squint" - she says that when they have sex, he thinks he is taking part in a threesome. An amusing story in many ways, but Ingemann is suggesting that the man's condition might pose problems for the relationship in the long run, and I totally agree with him on that.

I remember that many years ago, I knew a very squint-eyed man at work, and I never knew if he was talking to me or my colleague. In the end, I realized that when he was looking at me, he wanted to talk with my colleague, and vice versa.

This kind of problem will only worsen in the future, especially for the middle-aged and elderly, and Ingemann is very aware of that. He has his finger on the pulse again, as usual!

18:00 We have dinner and watch television. An interesting documentary film is on (1st part of 3), all about Miriam Margoyles, a famous 76-year-old English-Australian actress, and her recent trip to the American Mid-West, where she talked to a lot of local residents.

Lois and I feel a microscopic connection with Miriam: she was born in the city of Oxford, just like us. She went to Oxford High School where my little sister Gill went and she was a classmate of Lois's lifelong friend, Jen.

We also spotted her once on a Eurostar train to Paris in the 1990s - she was in the same carriage, and at one point we saw her sneaking off to one of the train's many toilets - good grief how exciting!

Actress Miriam Margoyles, on her way to the United States

She lived in the United States for 16 years, but she is aware that since then the country has changed a lot. Lois and I quickly realize that Miriam is quite famous in the United States because of her performance in the Harry Potter movies (as "Prof. Sprout").

Lois and I do not know anything about Harry Potter, and we often feel out of things - I do not know what the solution is to this problem: at our age we do not want to start reading the books and watching the movies - it would be too annoying, no doubt about that!!!!

Candice Jordan, gossip journalist and ex-Playboy model,

offers to take Miriam to a party where Chicago's filthy-rich people hobnob

Candice was recently asked to recreate

her original (1979) Playboy cover

Lois and I are a little worried in case Miriam with all her well-known attitudes does nothing but criticize American society, but in fact she in the end becomes very impressed and touched by the friendliness and positive attitude of the Americans and the optimism of the immigrants who become citizens at a special ceremony where she is a spectator. She talks with a man from the Congo who says the oath in front of a federal judge, along with many others.

This was Lois' and my experience also when we lived in the United States between 1982 and 1985.

Miriam talks with an immigrant from the Congo

who becomes an American citizen at a special ceremony

in front of a federal judge

22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzzz !!!!

Danish translation

09:15 Lois og jeg kører over til Bishops Cleeve, en lille by, der ligger 3 miles nord for Cheltenham, for at indkøbe på det lokale Tesco-supermarked, og hente de 12 elektriske pære, vi bestillede hos den lokale isenkræmmer.

Vi fik for 4 år siden 6 moderne loftlysmonteringer installeret i badeværelset, og 5 af pærerne er desværre nu blevet brændt ud. Isenkræmmerens eje fortalte mig for nylig, t disse slags pærer ikke længere fremstilles. Du godeste, sikke et vanvid!!!! Så derfor besluttede jeg at bestille 12 nye pærer, og forhåbentlig vil vi ikke have brug for flere, end 12, før vi dør eller flytter andetsteds.

På vej til Bishops Cleeve, smutter vi ind i det lokale postkontoret og købe 3 børnemagasiner (2 eksemplarer ”Art”-magasin, og et ”Star Wars”-magasin, for at sende til vores børnebørn i København.

Det hele koster en formue herunder porto - du godeste! Men vi er begge glade for at kunne gøre dem denne lille tjeneste og holde vores børnebørn lidt i kontakt med ”det gamle land”.

børnemagasinerne, vi har købt til vores børnebørn

i København, for at holde dem lidt i kontakt med ”det gamle land”

12:00 Vi spiser frokost og bagefter ringer Jeff, vores blikkenslager, på døren. Han går i gang med at udføre service på vores gaskedel i køkkenet og gaskaminen i stuen. Efter en time skal han af sted, og vi betaler ham (£78). Jeg går i seng for at tage mig en gigantisk eftermiddagslur.

15:30 Jeg står op og vi slapper af med en kop te og et stykke julekage. Jeg sætter mig foran computeren. Vores U3A danske gruppe holder dens næste møde i morgen eftermiddag, så derfor giver jeg mig til udarbejde en ordforrådtest, jeg vil have dem til at forsøge sig med.

Jeg plejer at vælge et dansk ordsprog eller citat med en aktuel interesse, og arrangere testen så de rigtige svar staver det pågældende ordsprog eller citat.

Jeg finder 4 ordsprog, der henviser til måned januar:

Januar fryser gryden på ilden.

Hvis græsset gror i januar bliver sommer-engen bar.

Den sorteste måned i et år, det er måned januar.

En våd januar, en våd vår.

Jeg vælger det tredje, fordi det er dødsimpelt og jeg formoder, at de ikke vil have svært ved at forstå det. Jeg er så varmhjertet ha ha ha!

Jeg synes, gruppens medlemmer er ivrige efter at lære danske ordsprog, selvom de er, som ordsprog på alle sprog, ganske intetsigende, og ligner ordsprog på andre sprog. Men de er samtidig trøstende, og bliver ofte brugt i reklamer, har jeg bemærket.

Men man må være forsigtig med ordsprog – en lokal reklamechef, Patrick Bergman, blev for nylig kritiseret for at autorisere brug af en upassende ordsprog ”det haster ikke mere, end det jager” i en reklame, der opmuntrede mennesker at skynde sig over til et 12-timers udsalg af sengelinned på en lokal stormagasin (rapport den 6. oktober 2004, kilde – Onion Local).

"Hvem bekymrer sig om alt det der?”, sagde Bergman til lokale journalister. ”Folk kender ordsproget, og de er modtagelige for det." Men det er Lois og jeg ikke helt sikre på. Vi mindes om, at vi missede sengelinnedudsalget på grund af reklamens ”blandede budskab”, en fiasko, der sandsyneligvis kostede os en lille formue, ingen tvivl om det. Sikke et vanvid!!!!

16:30 Jeg kigger lidt på nettet. Jeg finder Morten Ingemanns seneste tegneseriestribe. Du godeste! Jeg får lidt af et chok.

Danske Ingemann er min yndlingstegner – ingen tvivl om det! Han interesserer sig især for grimme, overvægtige, midaldrende eller ældre folk, de slags mennesker, som de fleste tegnere sjældent giver opmærksomhed til.

Danske Morten Ingemann, min yndlingstegner

Ingemann er en af mine vigtiste kilder, når det kommer til at forstå det danske samfund. Men jeg synes, at han i dag for en gangs skyld synliggør et problem, der overtræder nationale grænser, og påvirker alle de, der har dårligt syn. Ofte kan Ingemann kaste lys over to eller flere problemer i samme historielinje, hvilket er flot.

Mennesker verden over, finder, at deres syn forværres, ingen tvivl om det. I Storbritannien, bruger 61% af befolkningen briller eller kontaktlinser (ifølge en undersøgelse i 2012): statistikken var kun 57% i 2001.

I Danmark bruger ca. 60 % af den danske befolkning over 12 år briller. Da et nedsat syn ofte kommer med alderen stiger dette tal i den ældre del af befolkningen, således at det er 80 % af danskere over 40 år, der bruger briller og hele 92 % af danskere over 60 år.

I Ingemanns tegnestribe i dag ser vi to grimme midaldrende kvinder, der snakker med hinanden i en snedækket park. Den ene spørger den anden, hvordan det går med Palle, en midaldrende fyr, hun lige har mødt. Den anden kvinder svarer, at Palle er okay, men han er mega skeløjet – hun siger, at når de har sex, så tror han, at han er med i en trekant. En morsom historie på mange måder, men Ingemann antyder, at mandens tilstand måske kan volde problemer i forholdet i det lange løb, og det er jeg helt enig med ham i.

Jeg mindes, at jeg for mange år siden kendte en meget skeløjet mand på arbejde, og jeg vidste aldrig, om han talte med mig, eller med min arbejdskollega. På det sidste, indså jeg, at når han kiggede på mig, ønskede han at tale med min kollega, og omvendt.

Dette slags problem kommer bare til at forværres i fremtiden, især for midaldrende og ældre mennesker, og det er Ingemann meget klar over. Han har fingeren på pulsen igen, som sædvanligt!

18:00 Vi spiser aftensmad og ser lidt fjernsyn. De viser en interessant dokumentarfilm (1. del af 3), der handler om Miriam Margoyles, en berømt 76-årig engelsk-australsk skuespillerinde, og hendes nylige rejse i USAs midtvest, hvor hun snakkede med en masse lokale indbyggere.

Lois og jeg føler en mikroskopisk forbindelse med Miriam: hun er født i byen Oxford, ligesom os. Hun gik i Oxford High School, hvor min lillesøster Gill gik, og hun var en klassekammerat af Lois’s livslange veninde, Jen.

Også vi spottede hende på en Eurostar-tog til Paris i 1990’erne – hun var i samme personvognen, og vi så hende på et tidspunkt smutte på et af togets mange toiletter – du godeste, hvor spændende!

Skuespillerinden Miriam Margoyles, på vej til USA

Hun boede i USA i 16 år, men hun er klar over, at landet siden da har ændret sig meget. Lois og jeg indser hurtigt, at Miriam er ganske berømt i USA, på grund af hendes præstationer i Harry Potter filmene (som ”Prof. Sprout”). Lois og jeg kender ikke noget til Harry Potter, og vi føler os ofte udenfor – jeg ved ikke, hvad løsning er til dette problem: vi har ikke lyste på vores alder at begynde at læse bøgerne og se filmene – det ville være for irriterende, ingen tvivl om det!!!!

Candice Joran, sladderjournalist og eks-Playboy model,

tilbyde at tage Miriam med til en fest, hvor Chicagos stenrige mennesker samles

Candice blev for nylig bedt om at genskabe

sit oprindelige (1979) Playboy-forside

Lois og jeg er lidt bekymrede over, Miriam med alle sine velkendte attituder, kan gøre noget andet, end at kritisere det amerikanske samfund, men faktisk bliver hun endelig meget imponeret og rørt af amerikanernes venlighed og positive holdninger, og optimismen af indvandrerne, der bliver borgere til en speciel ceremoni, hun er tilskuer til. Hun snakker med en mand fra Congo, der aflægger eden foran en federale dommer, sammen med mange andre.

Dette var Lois' og min oplevelse også, da vi boede i USA mellem 1982 og 1985.