08:00 Lois and I get up. I sit down in front of my
laptop. I was a little worried about the laptop yesterday, because the screen repeatedly
froze and went black. But today the problem has disappeared thank god. What a
crazy world we live in !!!!
For safety's sake, however, I download all the
"important" files (ie all my Danish blogs in word format since August
2013 and all my old music CDs, etc.) onto a memory stick. Ha!
10:00 We talk a little on whatsapp with Sarah, our
daughter in Perth, Australia, and with her 4-and-a-half year old twins, Lily and
Jessie. These are exciting times for the family at the moment. On 5th to 7th.
February they have to move into their new rental house in Ocean Reef, and the
twins also start at kindergarten next month.
Francis, our son-in-law, is
out of the house today. He is watching a cricket match, England vs. Australia, at the city of Perth's shiny new Optus stadium, which was still in the process
of being built when Lois and I took our double deck bus tour of
the city two years back, while we were staying with Sarah and family for the first time.
The twins earlier today
11:00 I get started with reading the first 2 pages of
chapter 4 of Njáls saga, an Icelandic saga, written about 1280 AD. The saga's
story-line takes place in Rangárvellir in southern Iceland approx. 950-1015 AD,
and this chapter is about 2 brothers, Höskuldr and Hrut.
Höskuldr is married to some Icelandic woman, but Hrut,
his younger brother, although very handsome, is quite shy towards women. We know Hrut is
handsome because later on in the saga, the Norwegian queen Gunnhild gets a
megacrush on him and he becomes her toyboy and sex slave after she locks him in
her bedroom for two weeks. Yikes!
Hrut is handsome, but he is shy with women, so Höskuldr,
his older brother, decides to give him a little shove. After an Althing
(parliamentary) meeting, he takes Hrut into town and shows him a bunch of
beautiful "well-dressed" girls hanging around outside the houses in
Rangárvellir, where the local young single men live, and he points to Unnar,
whom he recommends as a good possible dream woman for his little brother.
Höskuldr shows Hrut, his little brother, a
bunch of beautiful local girls,
hanging around outside the houses where the local young
bachelors live.
He recommends Unnar as a good candidate for Hrut's dream-woman.
Höskuld asks Hrut, his little brother, if he likes Unnar.
Hrut replies that he likes her a lot, but he is not quite sure how well they will
get along with each other. Hrut is more sensitive and thoughtful than his big brother, no doubt about that.
an excerpt from Njáls saga
(my translations in red)
Höskuldr practically insists that Hrut marry Unnar, and
he fixes the bride-price and dowry with Unnar's father. There is no question of
asking Unnar herself what she thinks about the idea of hooking up with Hrut. In
those times, that kind of factor was not very important, it seems. What madness !!!!
11:30 I discuss the world's various courtship rituals
with Lois, who is a fan of Alexander McCall-Smith's crime novels, all set
in Botswana: courtship rituals there mostly involve cattle given by the man's
family to the happy couple.
Fathers sometimes become a bit desperate if their
daughter is not very attractive. It is well known that Lord Walter of Wykeham
had the idea of starting his own agony column in a local newspaper, advising
readers on personal problems and how best to solve them. All letter-writers
were offered Ageltrude, Lord Walter's unmarried daughter, along with other
extras. The column has become very popular and is now being syndicated to 250 newspapers worldwide (report, March 8, 2016, source Onion
Advice).
A typical example of a reader's letter with Lord Walter's
advice:
Dear Nobleman Attempting To Secure A Husband For His
Least-Marriageable Daughter [ie
Lord Walter - Ed],
My son is a freshman in college who almost never calls
home. When we do talk, it’s only for a few minutes, and I never get a sense of
what’s going on in his life. How can I encourage him to keep in touch without
making him feel as though I’m prying?
Yours,
"Shut-out In
Schaumburg" [real name Chuck Langsby: Ed]
Here’s Lord Walter's thoughtful answer:
Sir Langsby, you know me as a landowner of goodly
character and domain, do you not? Now, you will pardon my candor, but I believe
a man of your years is in want of a wife. As fortune would have it, my eldest
daughter, Ageltrude, is unbetrothed. You have no doubt seen her about the manor
in her generous smock. She may not possess the delicate features and smooth,
hairless visage of other maidens, but there is formidable strength in her ample
figure. Furthermore, she is unblemished in virtue. You would do me great honor
if you took her as your bride.
I realize that Lord Walter is very adept at "reading
between the lines" when it comes to his readers' cries for help. And he has his finger on the
pulse, that's something I know for sure!
12:00 We have lunch and afterwards we go to bed and take
a short afternoon afternoon. I stay lying in bed when Lois gets up at 1:30pm to
listen online to her church's Sunday service in the dining room. She has
decided not to go to church in person - she has had pain in her limbs and back.
15:15 I get up. The online church service has ended, so we relax
with a cup of tea on the couch.
18:00 We have dinner. I turn on my smartphone and I see I
have a Facebook text from Sylvia, Lois's cousin in Melbourne. Lois and I have
been worried about Sylvia for a few months. She did not send us a Christmas
card, and she has not posted anything on Facebook since mid-November. Very
mysterious. We have been wondering whether she was on a round the world cruise
or something similar. But now it seems she would like to get in touch again.
We stayed with Sylvia for a week in 2016, when we were on
the way to Perth, to visit Sarah, our daughter.
Flashback to April 2016: We spend a week
with Lois's cousin, Sylvia, in Melbourne
We are both all agog to hear why she went "off grid". She
is a widow, and we suspect she has found a boyfriend, but the jury is still out
on that one. Fascinating!
19:00 We talk a little on Skype with Alison, our daughter
in Denmark, and with Ed, Alison's husband. Ed's job in Copenhagen finishes at
the end of March. He is currently in search of a new job, which could be
anywhere in the world, which is a bit of a shame for Lois and me, but very
exciting for his family, we have to admit.
We talk a little on Skype with Alison, our
daughter in Denmark
21:00 We turn on the radio and listen to more "nasty
women", mostly stand-up comedians.
The program is very long - 3 hours in total, and Lois and
I agree that after one hour it becomes a bit boring to hear feminist after
feminist complain about the injustices of life, no matter how much one
sympathizes. Also, it's a little annoying to hear the phrase "I'm like"
in every other sentence, for example, in the following: "Anything else,
I'm like, I think everyone's grown up enough to know when we're just messing
about with each other ": very annoying, but Lois and I are after all just
a couple of old crows, we have to admit!
We like Asifa Lahore's version of "Barbie
Girl".
”I’m a Punjabi girl,
In a Punjabi world,
I’m still single,
And I’m bilingual.
“I’ve never cut my hair,
Or worn cheap underwear,
My qualifications,
Go down well with Asians.
Punjabi girl Asifa Lahore (left)
“I’m a Punjabi girl,
In a Punjabi world,
I’ve never ventured,
Further than Heston…
“My boyfriend’s 23,
Drives a big Ford Capri,
He’s so cute and he’s oh so romantic”
“You’re my babe, you’re my bird,
Best you’re seen and not heard,
Hurry up, now strip off, mind my gear-stick.”
“You can look, but keep it clean,
Or my brothers will split your spleen.
“I’m a Punjabi girl,
In a Punjabi world,
Heavy petting
Is all you’re getting.”
“I can pose, I can shout,
Knock my woman about,
If I don’t all my mates call me pansy.”
However, I can't help feeling a little distracted by tomorrow's
appointment with the dentist.A couple of months ago, I suspected that one of my
back teeth had fallen out, but later I became convinced that I had just bitten
on something hard in the bread I was eating. But when I saw Josh, our dentist 3
weeks ago, the terrible truth was revealed - I had actually lost a filling:
damn (again)!
Josh said that the filling was a very big one and he could not
replace it. I had 3 options: the first to ignore the problem and hope
for the best; the second to have the tooth pulled out; third, to try a little
root canal treatment - yikes !!! I do not even know what the third option (root
canal) means, but I suspect it's not very pleasant - yikes (again) !!!!!
Tomorrow I have another appointment with Josh to discuss
the three options - scary !!!
22:00 We go to bed - zzzzzz !!!!
Danish translation
08:00 Lois og
jeg står op. Jeg sætter mig foran min laptop. Jeg var lidt bekymret over den i
går, da skærmen gentagende gange frøs og blev sort. Men i dag er problemet
forsvundet gudskelov. Sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!!
Men for en
sikkerheds skyld downloader jeg alle de vigtige filer (dvs alle mine danske blogs
i word format siden august 2013 og alle
mine gamle musik-cd’er osv) på et hukommelsestab. Ha!
10:00 Vi taler
lidt på whatsapp med Sarah, vores datter i Perth, Australien, og med hendes
4,5-årige tvillinger, Lily og Jessie. Disse er spændende tider for familien på
det nuværende tidspunkt. De skal flytte ind i deres nye lejehus den 5.-7.
februar i Ocean Reef, og tvillingerne starter i børnehaven også næste måned.
Francis, vores svigersøn, er ude af huset i dag. Han ser på en cricketkamp,
England vs. Australien på byen Perths spritnye Optus stadion, som man var
stadig i færd med at bygge, da Lois og jeg for 2 år siden tog vores
dobbeltdækkebustur af byen, mens vi boede hos Sarah for første gang.
Tvillingerne
tidligere på dagen
11:00 Jeg går
i gang med at læse de første 2 sider af kapitel 4 af Njáls saga, en islændingesaga,
som er skrevet ca. 1280. Sagas historie foregår i Rangárvellir på det sydlige
Island ca. år 950-1015, og denne kapitel handler om 2 brødre, Höskuldr og Hrut.
Höskuldr er
gift med en eller anden islandske kvinde, men Hrut, hans yngre bror er smuk,
men ganske genert over for kvinder. Vi ved, Hrut er smuk, fordi senere på
sagaen, får den norske dronning, Gunnhild, en megacrush på ham, og han bliver hendes
toyboy og sexslave, efter hun låser ham ind i sit soveværelse i to uger.
Hrut er smuk,
men han er genert overfor kvinder, så Höskuldr, hans ældre bror, beslutter at
give ham et lille skub. Efter et altingmøde, tager han Hrut med ind i byen, og
viser ham en flok smukke ”velklædte” piger, der hænger ud udenfor de huse i Rangárvellir,
hvor de lokale ungkarle bor, og han påpeger Unnar, som han anbefaler som en god
drømmekvinde til sin lillebror.
Höskuldr viser Hrut, hans lillebror, en flok smukke lokale piger,
der
hænger ud udenfor de huse, hvor de lokale jungkarle bor.
Han
anbefaler Unnar som en god kandidat for Hruts drømmekvinde
Höskuldr
spørge Hrut, sin lillebror, om han kan lide Unnar. Hrut svarer, at han vældig
godt kan lide hende, men han er ikke helt sikker på, at de godt vil komme ud af
det med hinanden. Hrut er mere følsom og betænksom end sin storbror, ingen
tvivl om det.
uddrag
fra Njáls saga
(mine
oversættelser i rød)
Höskuldr
insisterer næsten på, at Hrut gifter sig med Unnar, og han fastsætter
brudeprisen og medgiften med Unnars far. Der er ingen tale om at spørge selve
Unnar, hvad hun synes om idéen om at finde sammen med Hrut. I de der tider var
dette slags argument ikke særlig vigtigt, lader det til. Sikke et vanvid !!!!
11:30 Jeg
diskuterer verdens forskellige frieriritualer med Lois, der er fan af Alexander
McCall-Smiths krimiromaner, der udspiller sig i Botswana: frieriritualer
derover involverer for det meste kvæg, der bliver givet af mandens familie til
det lykkelige par.
Fædre bliver
nogle gange lidt desperate, hvis datteren ikke er videre køn. Det er velkendt,
at Lord Walter af Wykeham fandt på, at starte sin egen column i en lokal avis,
hvor han rådgiver læsere med personlige problemer om, hvordan de bedst kan løse
dem. Alle brevskrivere blev tilbudt Ageltrude, Lord Walters ugifte datter, sammen
med andre tillokkelser. Columnen er blevet meget populær og bliver nu
offentliggjort samtidig i 250 aviser verden over (rapport, den 8. marts 2016,
kilde Onion Advice).
Et typisk
eksempel på et læserbrev med Lord Walters rådgivning:
Kære adelmand, der prøver at få fat på en ægtemand
til sin mindst nydelige datter [dvs Lord Walter - red],
Min søn er første års student på et universitet,
der næsten aldrig ringer hjem. Når vi snakker, er det kun i et par minutter, og
jeg har aldrig den mindste anelse om, hvad der sker i hans liv. Hvordan kan jeg
opfordre ham til at holde kontakten uden at få ham til at føle sig som om jeg
er nysgerrig?
- “Udelukket i Schaumburg” [ægte navn Chuck
Langsby: red]
Lord Walters svar:
Kære hr. Langsby, du kender mig som grundejer af
god karakter og domæne. Nu må du undskylde min åbenhed, men jeg tror, at en
mand i din alder mangler en kone. Heldigvis er min ældste datter, Ageltrude, ikke
trolovet. Du har uden tvivl set hende tumle sig rundt i herregården i sin løstsiddende
busseronder og kæmpekjoler. Det kan være at hun ikke har de delikate træk og
glatte, hårløse ansigter af andre jomfruer, men der er en formidabel styrke i
sin skjult kropsform. Desuden er hendes dyd også stadig uberørt. Vil
du gøre mig den store ære af at tage hende som din brud?
Jeg fornemmer,
at Lord Walter er meget dygtig til at ”læse mellem linjerne” i sine læseres råb
om hjælp. Han har fingeren på pulsen, det ved jeg med sikkerhed!
12:00 Vi
spiser frokost, og bagefter går vi i seng for at tage en kort eftermiddagslur.
Jeg bliver liggende inde i sengen, da Lois kl 13:30 står op for at lytte på
nettet til sin kirkes gudstjeneste i spisestuen. Hun har besluttet ikke at gå
personligt i kirke – hun har haft ondt i lemmerne og ryggen for tiden.
15:15 Jeg står
op. Gudstjenesten er sluttet, så vi slapper af med en kop te i sofaen.
18:00 Vi spiser
aftensmad. Jeg tænder for min smartphone og jeg ser, jeg har en Facebook-sms
fra Sylvia, Lois’ kusine i Melbourne. Lois og jeg har været bekymret over
Sylvia i et par måneder. Hun sendte os ikke noget julekort, og hun har ikke
lagt noget op på Facebook siden midten af november. Meget gådefuldt. Vi har
spekuleret om, om hun var på et verdensomspædende krydstogt eller noget
lignende. Men nu ser det ud som om, hun gerne ville få i kontakten igen.
Vi boede hos
Sylvia i en uge i 2016, da vi var på vej til Perth, for at besøge Sarah, vores
datter.
Tilbageblik
til april 2016: vi tilbringer en uge
hos
Lois’ kusine, Sylvia, i Melbourne
Vi er lutter
øren efter at høre, hvorfor hun mistede kontakt med os. Hun er enke, men vi
mistænker, at hun har fandt sammen med en kæreste, men det er juryen stadig ude
om. Fascinerende!
19:00 Vi taler
lidt på Skype med Alison, vores datter i Danmark, og med Ed, Alisons mand. Eds
job i København ophører ved slutningen af marts. Han er for tiden på jagt efter
et nyt job, der kan være hvor som helst i verden, hvilket er lidt af en skam
for Lois og mig, men meget spændende for hans familie, det må vi indrømme.
Vi
taler lidt på Skype med Alison, vores datter i Danmark
Alison og Ed
har besluttet at blive boende i deres nuværende hus indtil slutningen af juni,
så deres 3 børns skolegang ikke er forstyrret – lejehusets ejeren har aftalt at
bede om en lidt mindre leje efter Eds job ophører om to måneder.
21:00 Vi tænder for radioen og lytter flere ”ubehagelige
kvinder”, for det meste stand-up komikere.
Programmet er
meget lange – 3 timer i alt, og Lois og jeg er enige om, at det efter en time bliver
lidt kedeligt at høre feminist efter feminist beklage sig om livets
uretfærdigheder, uanset hvor meget man sympatiserer. Også er det lidt
irriterende at høre udtrykket ”I’m like” i hvert anden sætning, som for
eksempel i som følger: ”Anything else, I’m like, I think everyone’s adult
enough to know when we’re just messing about with each other”: meget irriterende,
men Lois og jeg er trods alt bare et par gamle krager, det må vi indrømme!
Vi kan godt lide Asifa Lahores version af ”Barbie Girl”.
”I’m a Punjabi girl,
In a Punjabi world,
I’m still single,
And I’m bilingual.
“I’ve never cut my hair,
Or worn cheap underwear,
My qualifications,
Go down well with Asians.
Punjabi girl, Asifa Lahore (til venstre)
“I’m a Punjabi girl,
In a Punjabi world,
I’ve never ventured,
Further than Heston…
“My boyfriend’s 23,
Drives a big Ford Capri,
He’s so cute and he’s oh so romantic”
“You’re my babe, you’re my bird,
Best you’re seen and not heard,
Hurry up, now strip off, mind my gear-stick.”
“You can look, but keep it clean,
Or my brothers
will split your spleen.
“I’m a Punjabi girl,
In a Punjabi world,
Heavy petting
Is all you’re getting.”
“I can pose, I can shout,
Knock my woman about,
If I don’t all my mates call me pansy.”
Jeg føler mig
imidlertid lidt distraheret af morgendagens aftale hos tandlægen.
For et par måneder
siden mistænkte jeg, at en af mine bagtænder var fældt ud, men senere blev jeg
overbevist om, at jeg bare havde bidt i
et eller andet hårdt i brødet, jeg spiste. Men da jeg så Josh, vores tandlæge
for 3 uger siden, blev den forfærdelige sandhed afsløret – jeg havde faktisk
mistet en plombe: pokkers (igen)!
Josh sagde, at
den pågældende plombe var meget stor, og han ikke kunne udskifte den. Jeg havde
3 optioner: den første, at ignorere problemet og håbe på det bedste; den andet,
at få tanden trukket ud; det tredje, at forsøge sig med lidt rodkanalbehandling
– yikes!!! Jeg ved ikke engang hvad den tredje option (rodkanal) betyder, men
jeg mistænker, den ikke er særligt behageligt – yikes (igen)!!!!!
I morgen har
jeg igen en tid hos Josh for at diskutere de tre optioner – skræmmende!!!
22:00 Vi går i
seng – zzzzzz!!!!
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