Tuesday 30 January 2018

08:30 I turn on my smartphone and I see Lois has a Facebook message from Sylvia, her cousin in Melbourne. Lois and I have been a little worried about Sylvia for a couple of months. For the first time in years she did not send us a Christmas card or calendar, and she has not posted anything up on  Facebook since mid-November, which was very puzzling. We had wondered if she was on a round-the-world cruise or something similar over Christmas and New Year . But now it seems she would like to get in touch again.

We stayed with Sylvia for a week in 2016 when we were on our way to Perth to visit Sarah, our daughter.

Flashback to April 2016: We spend a week

with Lois' cousin, Sylvia, in Melbourne

Lois and I have all agog since yesterday waiting to hear why Sylvia went "off-grid". She is a widow, and we suspect she has hooked up with a new boyfriend. 

Today she sends Lois a picture of her latest "squeeze", Rod, who looks like a tall, slim man the same age as her . We wonder if Sylvia and Rod went on a cruise together over Christmas and New Year, but we're not sure about that. If it's true, then hurrah for her. You are never too old to have fun.

09:30 I call the Thomas Cook Travel Agency in the local Waitrose supermarket, to order Australian cash for our upcoming vacation.

10:30 We drive into town to buy a few things. I park in Portland street car park and pay via smartphone, so I can feel like a modern person.

We pop into the bank and I ask them to order me a non-contactless credit card instead of the contactless card they recently sent me in the mail. I'm a bit suspicious about whether the contactless ones are as secure as the old cards. Afterwards Lois pops into Specsavers Optics to get her new glasses adjusted. Busy, busy, busy! How on earth did we ever find the time to go to work ha ha ha.

We swing by the Boots pharmacy and buy a few things for the holiday. I buy a couple of bottles of antiseptic mouthwash because I'm afraid my teeth will soon start getting sensitive again - and I'm thinking the pain has already begun - yikes!

We have a cup of coffee and a piece of cake in the M & S cafe and afterwards we drive home.

13:00 We eat lunch and afterwards I go to bed and have a huge afternoon nap.

15:00 I get up and start reading a few pages of John Trevisa's "Dialogue between a lord and a clerk". Lynda's U3A "Making of English" group has its next monthly meeting on Friday, and this Middle English dialogue is the group's current project. Tomorrow there is a meeting of Scilla's U3A Old Icelandic Group, and it is very important that I do not mix up the Middle English and Old Icelandic languages in my head: sometimes the two languages are very similar - help!

I come across a couple of interesting words in the dialogue. The English word "cunning" simply meant knowledge in those days: it was not until the 16th century that the word began to mean craftiness, which sometimes carries a bit of a negative subtext.

I'm starting to feel a little coldy and at the same time very tired. Damn! So far through the winter, I have kept myself clear of illness and I had started to get a little too cocky - just my luck !!!

17:30 We have dinner a little earlier than usual and afterwards Lois has to go out. She wants to attend a Bible seminar taking place this evening in Brockworth library. The seminar is all about the minor prophets. She drives over to Mari-Ann and Alf's house in Hatherley and they will drive her over to Brockworth.

18:30 I have a little alone-time and look at my smartphone. I read an interesting article about Trump and his long-time friend, Suzann Pettersen, the Norwegian golf-darling. According to the article, Suzann says that Trump cheats a lot during golf matches. He is not specially good at playing golf, and he usually claims he has had better scores than he really did. And he tends to persuade his opponents to concede him puts ("gimmes"), even if they're not particularly short ones - good grief, what a crazy world we live in !!!

To me it is very nostalgic to read about Suzann again. I remember that 2-3 years ago I got megacrushes on a bunch of Scandinavian sports-darlings, including Caroline Wozniacki, the Danish tennis-darling who by coincidence on Saturday won the Australian Open grand slam tennis tournament, the season's first tournament, and Caroline's first grand slam win.

Suzann Pettersen, the Norwegian golf-darling was another of my megacrushes. On September 20, 2015, I wrote in my blog about a rather unpleasant fight between Suzann and Alison Lee.

Suzann Pettersen, the Norwegian golf-darling

I wrote in my blog 2 years ago that Suzann Pettersen, the Norwegian golf-darling, and Alison Lee, the American golf-darling, had a fight on the Solheim Cup's last day and many players from both the American and European teams were in tears. 

Alison believed that Suzann had conceded the 17th hole. As a result Alison picked up her ball, which was only 15 inches (37.5cm) from the hole, instead of playing it. But Suzann immediately insisted that she had not in fact conceded - oh dear! So Suzann won the hole after all.

Flashback to September 2015: a fight between Suzann Petterson

and Alison Lee leaves many players in tears

I had thought golfers never had fights! But Lois tells me that golf is a merciless sport - oh dear! I wrote in the blog at the time, that Suzann takes no prisoners! Perhaps she is as merciless as Trump. What madness !!!!

Flashback to September 2015 -

Suzann Pettersen, the Norwegian golf darling hit the headlines

in my then blog - shock horror !!!!

19:30 I look at my smartphone. Lois has received another Facebook message from Sylvia, her cousin in Melbourne. She says that Rod is in fact her partner and that she has sent Lois an email to explain the situation. I look at Lois' mailbox and I see that the email unfortunately has not arrived - damn it!

Rod: Sylvia's latest "squeeze"

20:00 I listen a bit to the radio, an interesting program all about ways people like to end letters and emails. The host of the program is the charming Michael Rosen.

An interesting program - it's a bit of a shame that I drift off to sleep in the middle of it. And Lois is not here to pinch me in the arm. Damn!

Before I fall asleep, I hear some abrupt expressions one can end an email with: for example, "Thanks." (The stop is the brutal part).

Also, the editor who replied to all her staff's suggestions for articles with just one word: "yep" or "nope".

Also Hillary Clinton's 2-3 word phrases: "Is this done?" Or "Update me".

Expressions that appear to be friendly, but aren’t really: "Thanks in advance" or "Just a friendly reminder".

People did it differently in the 15th century. One family's letters and correspondence were subpoenaed by a judge and you can still read them in official archives.

William Paston ended a letter with "I submit me in all this matter to your good discretion, and ever gramercy God and you who have you and me in his gracious governance. Your man. Wm Paston. "

Very historic, although "Your man" sounds a little bit "urban slang" to my ears.

William's wife, Margaret ended a letter to her husband as follows: "The blessed trinity have you in his keeping, by your groaning wife. M. P. ". I like that too, even though the word "groaning" is a bit ambiguous, I think. Was it a compliment to her husband or a complaint? The jury is still out on that one (after 600 years ha ha ha).

22:00 Lois comes back. I go to bed, but Lois needs to wind down after the evening's stimulating Bible seminar about the minor prophets. Poor Lois !!!!! She starts to watch a bit of television. She does not wake me up when she hops into bed with me an hour later.

Danish translation

08:30 Jeg tænder for min smartphone og jeg ser, Lois har en Facebook-besked fra Sylvia, sin kusine i Melbourne. Lois og jeg har været lidt bekymret over Sylvia i et par måneder. For første gang i årevis sendte hun os ikke noget julekort eller kalender, og hun ikke lagde noget op på Facebook siden midten af november, hvilket var meget gådefuldt. Vi havde spekuleret på, om hun julen og nytåret over var på et verdensomspædende krydstogt eller noget lignende. Men nu ser det ud som om, hun gerne ville få i kontakten igen.

Vi boede hos Sylvia i en uge i 2016, da vi var på vej til Perth, for at besøge Sarah, vores datter.

Tilbageblik til april 2016: vi tilbringer en uge

hos Lois’ kusine, Sylvia, i Melbourne

Vi har siden i går været lutter øren efter at høre, hvorfor hun gik off-grid. Hun er enke, men vi mistænker, at hun har fandt sammen med en ny kæreste, og i dag sender hun Lois et billede af sin seneste ”squeeze”, Rod, der ser ud som en høj, mager mand i samme alderen, som hende. Vi spekulerer over, om Sylvia og Rod gik på krydstogt sammen julen og nytåret over, men det er vi ikke helt sikre på. Hvis det er sandt, så hurra for hende. Man er aldrig for gammel til at få det sjovt.

09:30 Jeg ringer til Thomas Cook-rejsebureauet, der har til huse i det lokale Waitrose-supermarked, for at bestille australske kontant til vores kommende ferie.

10:30 Vi kører ind i byen for at købe et par ting. Jeg parkerer i Portlandgade-parkeringspladsen og betale via smartphone, så jeg kan føle mig som et modern menneske.

Vi smutter ind i banken og jeg beder dem om, at bestille mig et ukontaktløst kreditkort i stedet for det kontaktløse kort, de for nylig sendte mig med post. Jeg er lidt mistænksom over, om de kontaktløse er så sikre som de gamle kort. Bagefter smutter Lois ind i Specsavers Optik, for at få sine nye brille justeret. Travlt, travlt, travlt! Hvordan for fanden fandt vi tiden til at gå på arbejde ha ha ha. 

Vi kigger ind i Boots-apoteket og køber et par ting til ferien. Jeg køber et par flasker antiseptisk mundskyldning, fordi jeg er bange for, at mine bagtænder snart bliver følsomme igen – jeg synes, smerten er begyndt allerede – yikes!

Vi drikker en kop kaffe og spiser et stykke kage i M&S-caféen og bagefter kører vi hjem.

13:00 Vi spiser frokost og bagefter går jeg i seng for at tage en gigantisk eftermiddagslur.

15:00 Jeg står op og går i gang med at læse et par sider af John Trevisas ”Dialog mellem en herre og en ekspedient”. Lyndas U3A ”Making  of English”-gruppe har sit næste månedlige møde på fredag, og denne middelengelske dialog er gruppens nuværende projekt. I morgen er der et møde af Scillas U3A oldislandske gruppe, og det er meget vigtigt at jeg ikke blander det middelengelske og det oldislandske sprog sammen i mit hoved: nogle gange er de to sprog meget lignende – hjælp!

Jeg falder over et par interessante ord i dialogen. Det engelske ord ”cunning” betød dengang simpelthen kendskab: det var ikke indtil det 16. århundrede, at ordet begyndte at betyde listighed, som nogle gange bærer lidt af en negativ undertekst.

Jeg begynder at føle mig lidt forkølet og samtidig meget træt. Pokkers! Hidtil gennem vinteren har jeg holdt mig væk fra sygdom, og jeg var begyndt at blive lidt for selvtilfreds – bare mit held!!!

17:30 Vi spiser aftensmad lidt tidligere, end normalt og bagefter skal Lois ud. Hun ønsker at deltage i et bibelseminar, der finder sted i aften i byen Brockworths bibliotek. Seminaret kredser om de mindre profeter. Hun kører over til Mari-Ann og Alfs hus i Hatherley og de vil køre hende over til Brockworth.

18:30 Jeg har lidt alenetid og kigger på min smartphone. Jeg læser en interessant artikel om Trump og hans langvarige ven, Suzann Pettersen, den norske golf-darling. Ifølge artiklen siger Suzann, at Trump snyder meget under golfkampe. Han er ikke ret dygtig til at spille golf, og han plejer at sige, at han har haft bedre resultater, end han virkellig har haft. Og han har tendens til at overtale sine modstandere til at medgive ham puts, endda hvis de er ikke ret korte – du  godeste, sikke en skør verden vi lever i !!!

For mig er det meget nostalgisk at læse igen om Suzann. Jeg mindes, at for 2-3 år siden, jeg fik  megacrushes på en flok af skandinavske sport-darlings, herunder Caroline Wozniacki, den danske tennis-darling, der i lørdags vandt Australian Open grand-slam tennisturneringen, sæsonens første turnering, og Carolines første grand-slam-gevinst.

Suzann Pettersen, den norske golf-darling var en anden af mine megacrushes. Den 20. september 2015 skrev jeg i min blog om en lidt ubehagelige skænderi mellem Suzann og Alison Lee, den amerikanske golf-darling.

Suzann Pettersen, den norske golf-darling

Jeg skrev, at Suzann Pettersen, den norske golf-darling, og Alison Lee, den amerikanske golf-darling, havde en skænderi i løbet af Solheim Cups sidste dag, og mange spillerinder fra både det amerikanske og det europæiske hold var i tårer. Alison troede, at Suzann havde erkendt sig slået på 17. hul. Derfor opsamlede Alison sin bold, der lå kun 15” (37.5cm) fra hullet, i stedet for at spille den. Umiddelbart insisterede Suzann på, at hun faktisk ikke har erkendt sig slået – uha! Derfor vandt Suzann hullet efter alt.

Tilbageblik til september 2015: et skænderi mellem Suzann Pettersen

og Alison Lee resulterer i, at mange spillere er i tårer

Jeg havde troet, at golfspillere aldrig skændes! Men Lois fortæller mig, at golf er en nådesløs sport – uha! Jeg skrev i bloggen, at Suzann , tager ingen fanger! Det kan være, at hun er lige så nådesløs som Trump. Sikke et vanvid!!!!

tilbageblik til september 2015 –

Suzann Pettersen, den norske golf-darling ramte overskrifterne

i min daværende blog – chok rædsel !!!!

19:30 Jeg kigger på min smartphone. Lois har modtaget endnu en Facebook-besked fra Sylvia, sin kusine i Melbourne. Hun siger, at Rod faktisk nu er hendes partner, og at hun har sendt Lois en email for at forklare situationen. Jeg kigger på Lois’ mailboks, og jeg ser at emailen desværre ikke er ankommet – pokkers!

Rod: Sylvias seneste ”squeeze”

20:00 Jeg lytter lidt til radio, et interessant program, der handler om måder, folk kan lide at ende  breve og emails på. Programmets vært er den charmerende Michael Rosen.

Et interessant program – det er lidt af en skam, at jeg glider over i søvnen midt i programmet. Og Lois er ikke her for at knibe mig i armen. Pokkers!

Før jeg falder i søvn, hører jeg nogle uhøflige udtryk, man kan ende en email med: for eksempel ”Thanks.” (punktummet er den brutale del).

Også redaktøren, der besvarede alle hendes personalets forslag på artikler mellem kun 1 ord: ”yep” eller ”nope”.

Også Hillary Clintons 2-3 ords udtryk: ”Is this done?” eller “Update me”.

Udtryk, der ser ud som om de er venlige, men er ikke det virkelig: “Thanks in advance” eller “Just a friendly reminder”.

Folk gjorde det anderledes i det 15. århundrede. En families breve og korrespondance blev indstævnet af en dommer og man kan stadig læse dem i officielle arkiver.

William Paston endte et brev med ”I submit me in all this matter to your good discretion, and ever gramercy God and ye whoever have you and me in his gracious governance. Your man. Wm Paston.”

Meget historisk, selvom “Your man” lyder lidt “urban slang” i mine ører.

Williams kone, Margaret endte et brev til sin mand som følger: ”The blessed trinity have you in his keeping, by your groaning wife. M.P.”.  Det kan jeg godt lide også, selvom ordet “groaning” er lidt tvetydigt, synes jeg. Var det et kompliment til hendes mand, eller en klage? Det er juryen stadig ude om (efter 600 år ha ha ha).

22:00 Lois kommer tilbage. Jeg går i seng, men Lois trænger til at geare ned efter aftenens stimulerende bibelseminar om de mindre profeter. Stakkels Lois !!!!! Hun går i gang med at se lidt fjernsyn. Hun vækker mig ikke, da hun en time senere hopper op i sengen til mig.