Saturday, October 12 2019

07:45 Lois and I roll out of bed a little earlier than usual, because we have an appointment  "at 8:33" at our new doctor's surgery to get our annual free flu shots for old crows.

The appointment time seems suspiciously precise (and perhaps only academic, with the vague purpose of preventing a big bunch of old crows from all showing up at the same time), so we decide to take a chance and show up super-early, hoping they'll call us in immediately or almost immediately - plus, if we show up early, we have a better chance of parking the car in the tiny car-park - ha!

Overton Park - our new doctor’s surgery

The plan works very well. We show up 45 minutes early, manage to park in the tiny car-park, and hey presto the nurse call us in 5 minutes later. As usual, we both have a rather sore arm where the needle went in, but no other after-effects (so far), thank goodness.

Coincidentally, Steve, our American brother-in-law, who is almost an old crow himself, but not quite, also got his flu shot yesterday, and 6 hours later he got some flu symptoms, but these were temporary, it seems. But I don't know if he got the same mix as us, so the jury’s still out on all that.

But it's not just old crows and nearly-old crows who need annual flu shots always. I remind Lois about  local mum Kathleen Warner, who hit the headlines 6 years ago when she became distraught over her grown-up son's constant prevarications on the issue (source: the influential Onion News).

After leaving several phone and email messages reminding her son Josh, 28, to schedule an appointment with his doctor for his seasonal flu shot, area mother Kathleen Warner broke into his apartment overnight  Sunday and administered the 2013 flu vaccine herself, sources reported.

"I warned you," the 58-year-old woman whispered to her son through a black ski mask as she flicked the tip of the needle, pumped the syringe twice and jabbed it into his arm. “I told you to schedule an appointment with your primary care physician. I even sent you a list of local flu clinics in your area. But you wouldn't listen. Now we’re doing things my way. "

Sources confirmed that Warner, after giving her son the vaccine and rushing out of his room, quickly tidied up his bathroom before slipping out the back door.

Good grief - what a crazy world we live in !!

But Lois and I both sympathise a little with Kathleen - the millennial generation is far too laid-back in our opinion! And even Generation X isn't much better, we think. Lois' sect is run by a bunch of Generation X sect members who rarely show up on time to church services, and have a tendency to cancel scheduled meetings at the last minute, because they have suddenly remembered they have another appointment somewhere else – my god, what madness !!!!

But apologies - that was a bit of a digression. Back to our Saturday, and back to reality.

09:30 We come home from the doctor's and relax with a cup of coffee on the couch. We take it easy the rest of the morning, as the nurse advised us. It's nice to be under the doctor's orders, especially if the advice is to take it easy - ha ha! However, Lois still goes a short walk on the local football field, to alleviate her digestive problems.

In the meantime, I sit down with the computer and compile a Danish vocabulary list that I want our U3A Danish group members to learn by heart before the group's next meeting on October 21st. I am so demanding ha ha ha!

I also prepare a vocabulary test, based on the list, which I want members to take in their spare time before the group meeting. The correct answers to the questions spell out another of our favourite comedian Tim Vine's famous one-line jokes, "I saw this ad - TV, £2, volume stuck on ‘full’. And I thought, ‘I just can’t turn that down.’ "

Not one of his best maybe, but I’m going to let that one slide, because Tim is basically a kind-hearted man who took a wrong turn somewhere in the course of his long career as a stand-up.

Tim Vine, our favourite stand-up comedian

12:00 We have lunch and afterwards we go to bed and spend the afternoon under the duvet:  just to be on the safe side, now that our bodies are fighting off a bunch of mini flu microbes. We roll out of bed at 4 pm and relax with a cup of tea on the couch.

18:00 We have dinner and spend the rest of the evening watching some television, the first episode of the second season of "Motherland", a fun sitcom revolving around Julia, mother of 2 children, who is also trying to juggle a stressful job, unsuccessfully  for the most part.

Julia's best friends are the down-to-earth, cynical Liz with the lugubrious  face, and the useless "papa latte" stay-at-home-dad and total wimp, Kevin.

The stressed-out Julia (left) with her best friends,

the lugubrious, cynical Liz and the useless “papa latte” wimp, Kevin

The episode starts with a funny scene at the elementary school gates on the first day of the school year. Kevin, Liz and Julia are standing  with all the other parents, waiting for their children to emerge at the end of the day.

The lugubrious Liz has a funny line in sarcastic answers and repartee, a skill that is totally wasted on the literal-minded stay-at-home dad Kevin.

22:00 We go to bed. I can't lie comfortably on my left side because of the flu shot, and the left-handed Lois can’t do it on her right side, but anyway we're totally exhausted as usual - zzzzzzz !!!!!

Danish translation:  lørdag den 12. oktober 2019

07:45 Lois og jeg vælter ud af sengen lidt tidligere, end normalt, fordi vi har aftale "kl 8:33" hos vores nye lægehus for at få os vores årlige gratis influenza-skud til gamle krager. Aftalestiden virker mistænkt præcis (og måske kun akademisk, med det vage formål at forhindre en flok af gamle krager i at dukke samtidigt op), så beslutter vi at tage en chance og dukke op super-tidligt, i håbet om, at de vil kalde  os umiddelbart eller næsten umiddelbart ind – plus, hvis vi dukker tidligt op, har vi en bedre chance for at kunne parkere bilen i lægehusets lillebitte parkeringsplads - ha!

Overton Park – vores nye lægehus

Planen virker meget godt. Vi dukker op 45 minutter tidligt, formår at parkere i lægehusets lillebitte parkeringsplads , og hey presto sygeplejersken kalde os ind 5 minutter senere. Som sædvanligt har vi begge to lidt ondt i armen efter, hvor sprøjten trængte ind i os, men ikke nogle andre eftervirkninger (hidtil), gudskelov.

Steve, vores amerikanske svigerbror, der selv er næsten en gammel krage, men ikke 100% endnu,  fik også sit influenza-skød i går, og 6 timer senere fik han nogle influenza-symptomer, men disse var midlertidlige, lader det til. Men jeg ved ikke, om han fik samme blandingen som os, så det er juryen stadig ude om.

Men det er ikke kun gamle krager, og næsten-gamle krager, der har brug for årlige influenza-skud. Jeg minder Lois om den lokale mor Kathleen Warner, der ramte overskrifterne for 6 år siden, da hun blev fortvivlet over sin voksne søns konstante udsættelser!

Efter at have efterladt flere telefon- og e-mail-beskeder, der mindede hendes søn Josh (28) om at planlægge en aftale med sin læge for hans sæsonbestemte influenza-skud, brød områdets mor Kathleen Warner ind i sin lejlighed om aftenen søndag og indgav ham hans 2013 influenza vaccine sig selv, rapporterede kilder.

”Jeg advarede dig,” hviskede den 58-årige kvinde til sin søn gennem en sort skimaske, da hun svippede kanylens  spids, pumpede sprøjten to gange og bankede den i armen. ”Jeg sagde, at du skulle planlægge en aftale med din primærplejelæge. Jeg har endda sendt dig en liste over lokale influenza klinikker i dit område. Men du ville ikke lytte. Nu gør vi tingene på min måde. ”

Kilder bekræftede, at Warner, efter at have udgavet sin søn vaccinen og skyndt sig ud af hans værelse, hurtigt ryddede op på badeværelset, før hun gled ud af bagdøren.

Du godeste – sikke en skør verden vi lever i!!

Men vi sympatiserer lidt med Kathleen – den millenniale generation er alt for meget afslappet efter vores mening! Og endda generationen X er ikke ret meget bedre, synes vi!  Lois' sekt er drevet af en flok af generation X sektmedlemmer, der aldrig dukker op til gudstjenester til tiden, eller aflyser møder på det sidste øjeblik, fordi de pludselig mindes om, at de har en eller anden anderledes aftale - du godeste, sikke et vanvid !!!!

Men undskyld – det var lidt af et sidespring. Tilbage til vores lørdag, og tilbage til virkeligheden!

09:30 Vi kommer hjem fra lægehuset og slapper af med en kop kaffe i sofaen. Vi holder fri resten af formiddagen, som sygeplejersken rådte os til. Det er rart at være under lægens ordrer, især hvis rådet er, at holde fri – ha ha! Men Lois går imidlertid en kort tur på den lokale fodboldbane, for at lindre  sine fordøjelsesproblemer.

I mellemtiden sætter jeg mig med computeren og udarbejder en dansk ordforrådliste, jeg vil have vores U3A danske gruppes medlemmer til at lære udenad før gruppens næste møde den 21. oktober. Jeg er så krævende ha ha ha!

Jeg udarbejder også en ordforrådtest, baseret på listen, som jeg vil have medlemmerne til at tage i deres fritid før gruppemødet. De rigtige svar til spørgsmålene staver endnu én af vores yndlings-komiker Tim Vines berømte én-linje vittigheder, ”I saw this ad – TV, £2, volume stuck on ”full”. I thought, ”I can’t turn that down”.

Ikke én af hans bedste måske, men det springer jeg over, fordi Tim er en godthjertet mand, der tog en forkert drejning ét eller andet sted i løbet af sin karriere haha.

Tim Vine, vores yndlings-standup-komiker

12:00 Vi spiser frokost og bagefter går vi i seng og tilbringer eftermiddagen under dynen: hellere være på den sikre side, når vores kroppe er i gang med at kæmpe mod et bundt af mini-influenza mikrober hahaha (igen).Vi vælter ud af sengen kl 16 og slapper af med en kop te i sofaen.

18:00 Vi spiser aftensmad og bruger resten af aftenen på at se lidt fjernsyn, det første afsnit af den 2. sæson af ”Motherland”, en morsom sitcom, der kredser om Julia, en mor til 2 børn, som også forsøger at jonglere et stressende job, uden succés for det meste.

Julia bedste venner er den jordnære Liz med bedemandsansigtet, og den unyttige ”papa latte” tøsedreng, Kevin.

Den stressede Julia (til venstre) med sine bedste venner,

den dystre Liz og den unyttige tøsedreng og papa latte, Kevin

Afsnittet starter med en morsom scene ved folkeskolens lågere, hvor Kevin, Liz og Julia står og venter på, at deres børne dukker frem ved slutningen af skoledagen.

Liz har en morsom linje i sarkastiske svar og kvik i replikken, en færdighed, der er spildt på den unyttige, bogstavelig-sindede Kevin.

22:00 Vi går i seng. Jeg kan ikke ligge bekvemt på min venstre side på grund af influenza-skuddet, og Lois kan ikke på sin højre side, men vi er i hvert fald totalt udmattede som sædvanligt  – zzzzzzz!!!!!