Saturday, 10 December 2016

Fredag den 9. december kl 1630 til lørdag den 10. december 2016 kl 1629

17:00 Jeg hopper op på min kondicykel og jeg cykler 6 miles (10km). Hurra! Nu er jeg helt sikker på, at jeg kan blive rask igen!

18:00 Lois og jeg spiser aftensmad, og derefter bruger vi aftenen på at døse i sofaen og se lidt fjernsyn engang imellem. På ét tidspunkt (kl 21.45?) får vi et telefonopkald fra Ruth, konen af Lois’s fætter Brian. Heldigvis har vi nummervisning, dvs et system, der tillader os at se et opkald til nummeret, og ofte også til navnet på den person, der ringer. Dette gør det muligt at ignorere eller sende opkaldet til en telefonsvarer.

Ruths opkald er senere end vores cut-off tid. Ruth kan også godt lide at snakke længe! Hun er en rigtig natteravn, mens Lois og jeg er morgenmennesker, især mig. Så beslutter vi ikke at afhente modtageren, og opkaldet bliver sendt til vores telefonsvarer – hurra! Vi genoptager vores lur i sofaen, lænende os ind mod hinanden  som det ældre ægtepar vi er – zzzzz!!!!

Nu og da ser vi lidt fjernsyn. De viser en dokumentarfilm (1. del af 3), der handler om historien af byen Wien, det habsburgske dynasti, og det tysk-romerske Rige. Programmets vært er den betænksomme Simon Sebag Montefiore (skørt navn, skør fyr!!!) – Lois og jeg kalder ham ”Teabag”, et velment øgenavn – jeg håber, han ikke føler sig fornærmet – du godeste!


Desværre glider jeg over i søvnen efter 5 minutter, og jeg vågner med et sæt 35 minutter efter, men Lois fortæller mig nogle af detaljerne jeg er gået glip af. ”Teabag” har en ganske monoton stil. Programmet er proppet med oplysninger, mens han viser os stor bygning efter stor bygning og fortæller os byens historie, startende fra Romerriget op til slutningen af det 17. århundrede.  Den hovedsagelige variation i Teabags stil er, at han nogle gange bærer en hat, og nogle gange ser vi hans skaldede hoved.

Da jeg lærte historien i skole, henledte vores lærere ikke ret meget opmærksomhed på det tysk-romerske Rige. Vi fik det indtryk af, at Riget gjorde ikke så megen forskel på Englands historie. Englands hovedsagelige interesse, var altid kun at det kontinentale Europa aldrig bliver styret af ét meget magtfuldt land, eller én meget magtfuld leder. Ellers havde vi en ”hvad rager det os”-attitude – du godeste!


Den vigtigste variation i ”Teabags” stil er,
at han nogle gange bærer en hat, og nogle gange ser vi hans skaldede hoved – uha!

 
Det tysk-romerske Rige: England havde en
”hvad rager det os” – attitude – du godeste!

Jeg må ikke desto mindre indrømme, at det hapsburgiske dynasti hjalp England på én vigtig punkt – de forhindrede tyrkerne to gange i at invadere Europa.

Jeg mindes et gamle afsnit af Big Bang Theory, hvor Sheldon og hans venner løber tør af emner for samtaleemner. Sheldon forslår, at de alle diskuterer om årsagerne til, hvorfor den østrigste ærkehertug hed en ærkehertug, og ikke en ”almindelig” hertug. Desværre er Sheldons venner ikke interesseret i at forfølge dette spørgsmål, så seerne aldrig hører Sheldons teorier.

Heldigvis giver ”Teabag” os i aften forklaringen på dette interessante spørgsmål. Det viser sig, at Rudolf 4. fandt på den nye titel midt i det 14. århundrede. Han var jaloux på de andre tyske prinser, der havde for vane at grine af ham og ignorere ham.  Så besluttede han at forfalske en dokument, hvor det stod, at østrigske hertuger havde altid heddet ”ærkehertuger” (et spritnyt ord, som Rudolf bare sigtede!). Pludselig begyndte de andre tyske prinser at viser ham lidt respekt – endelig! Sikke et vanvid!!!! Men jeg ville ikke desto mindre have fortrukket at høre Sheldons teori – pokkers!!!!

22:00 Vi er på vej i seng, men vi standser ved foden af trappen, og hører den besked, som Ruth efterlod på  vores telefonsvarer.

Ruth og hendes mand, Brian (Lois’s fætter) skal deltage i en begravelse på mandag i Birmingham. De vil, på vej dertil og på vej hjem til Bournemouth, overnatte hos os søndag og mandag også. Du godeste!

Vi skal rydde op lidt i Sarahs gamle værelse – ingen tvivl om det. Jeg bruger værelset som mit personlige omklædningsrum og mini-motionscenter. Jeg har min kondicykel derinde. Og jeg har lagt ned i små bunker på Sarahs gamle dobbeltseng de ting jeg vil tage med til Danmark. Værelset er blevet et stort rod – det har jeg ingen nogen tvivl om! Pokkers! Men det vil være rart at se dem begge igen.

Vi kollapserer i sengen – zzzzzz!!!!

04:30 Jeg står tidligt op og laver én af mine rutinemæssige danske ordforrådtester.


08:00 Jeg skynder mig ind i køkkenet og laver to kopper te. Jeg bringer dem op på vores soveværelse og kryber tilbage i vores seng. Vi drikker teen, og bagefter ringer Lois til Brian og Ruth. Brian, Lois’s fætter, svarer, men efter 2 minutter, som altid, overtager Ruth, Brians kone, hurtigt samtalen fra deres ende.

De planlægger at spise frokost i morgen hos John, Ruths bror, der bor i nærheden af byen Bath. Derefter vil de køre videre til Cheltenham, spise en let aftensmad og overnatte hos os. På mandag skal de til Birmingham for at deltage i en begravelse. Den afdødes familie har inviteret dem til frokost før ceremonien. Efter begravelsen vil Brian og Ruth køre hjem til Bournemouth, men hvis de kommer til at være meget trætte, vil de overnatte igen hos os, og kører på tirsdag hjem.

08:30 Lois og jeg går i bad og står op.  Vi spiser morgenmad.

10:00 Jeg går i gang med at rydde op lidt i Sarahs gamle værelse. Jeg rykker mit tøj og andre ting, jeg har lagt på Sarahs gamle dobbeltseng ind i Alisons gamle værelse. Jeg rykker min kondicykel et par fods over til væggen. Jeg bemærker, at uret på Sarahs gamle natbord er indstillet til australske tid, så jeg stiller det 8 timer tilbage. Vi vil ikke have, at Ruth og Brian kommer 8 eller 16 timer for sent til mandags begravelse – det har jeg ikke nogen tvivl om !!!!

12:30 Vi spiser frokost og samtidig lytter vi til radio, et interessant program, der handler om Ian Fleming, James Bonds skaber, og den ældre kvinde, Phyllis Bottome, en forfatter, der inspirerede ham.

Fleming gjorde oprør i sin ungdom i 1930’erne,  mens han var elev på Eton College – han var allerede. som teenager, en uartig dreng, når det kom til piger og biler – du godeste! Hans mor fik ham indskrevet  på en sprogskole i Østrig, drevet af forfatteren, Phyllis Bottome og hendes mand, Alban Forbes Dennis, der var MI6s topagent i Østrig, Ungarn og nærliggende lande.

Det er underligt, at Phyllis selv skabte i sin 1946 roman, ”Lifeline”. en helt, der hed Mark Chalmers, som var en britisk agent og meget lignede James Bond.  Fleming skrev sin første James Bond roman, Casino Royale, 6 år senere, i 1952.

Forfatteren Phyllis Bottome, der inspirerede Ian Fleming

Phyllis indså, at den unge Ian Fleming gjorde oprør, fordi han led af ”perfekte storebror” syndrom. Hans storebror Peter var brilliant, og overholdt alle af livets traditionelle regler, så Ian besluttede, at han ikke kunne konkurere, og hans eneste option var at være til ulejlighed overfor alle. Phyllis ”tæmmede” Ian ved at opmuntre ham til at skrive historier.

Det er mig interessant, at både Lois og jeg var ”perfekte ældste børn”, der overholdt reglerne. Jeg havde en lillesøster, Kathy, og Lois havde en lillebror, Andrew. Både Kathy og Andrew var ganske uartige børn og havde for vane at gøre oprør – du godeste, sikke en tilfældighed!

13:30 Jeg går i seng og tager mig en gigantisk eftermiddagslur – zzzzzz!!!!

15:00 Jeg står op og kigger lidt på nettet. Jeg finder Morten Ingemanns seneste tegneseriestribe. Danskeren Morten er min yndlingstegner  – ingen tvivl om det! Han har mange egenskaber, som er et must med mig og en stor plus. Han interesserer sig meget for grimme, overvægtige, midaldrende folk, de slags mennesker, som de fleste tegnere sjældent giver opmærksomhed til.

Han har en rigtig forstand på den menneskelige natur og han fokuserer ofte på de vanskellige problemer, som grimme, overvægtige, midaldrende folk oplever i deres parforhold.

I hans seneste stribe ser vi en grim, overvægtig midaldrende mand, der snakker med sin læge, der er i gang med at undersøge ham. Manden fortæller lægen, at han vil gerne bliver over 100 år. Lægen spørger ham, om han ryger, eller drikker, eller spiller, eller kører for stærkt, eller har mange kærester. Manden kan heldigvis svare ”nej” på alle disse spørgsmål, og han ser dermed meget lettet ud. Han tror, at han har bestået testen med glans – hurra!

Desværre har historien en dårlig slutning. Lægen minder patienten, at hans ”sunde” livstil er ikke ret behagelig og derfor har har ingen stort motiv til at blive over 100 år. Det må have været lidt af et chok for patienten, og jeg forestiller mig, at han kom hjem lidt skuffet. Livet kan være besværligt nogle gange – det ved jeg med sikkerhed!!!!

16:00 Vi slapper af med en kop te og mince pies i sofaen – nam nam!!!!


English translation

17:00 I jump up on my exercise bike and I ride 6 miles (10km). Hooray! Now I am quite sure that I can get well again!

18:00 We have dinner, and then we spend the evening dozing on the sofa and watching TV some of the time. At one point (at 9:45pm?) we get a phone call from Ruth, the wife of Lois's cousin Brian. Fortunately, we have caller ID, ie a system that allows us to match a call to the number, and often to the name of the caller. This makes it possible to ignore the call, or send it to an answering machine.

Ruth's call is later than our cut-off time. Also, Ruth likes to talk a long time! She's a night owl, while Lois and I are early risers, especially me. So we decide not to pick up the receiver and the call is sent to our voice mail - hurrah! We resume our nap on the couch, leaning against each other like the elderly couple we are - zzzzz !!!!

Now and then we see a little television. They show a documentary (Part 1 of 3), about the history of the City of Vienna, the Habsburg dynasty, and the Holy Roman Empire. The program's host is the thoughtful Simon Sebag Montefiore (crazy name, crazy guy !!!) - Lois and I call him "Teabag", a well-intentioned nickname - I hope he does not feel insulted - my god!


Unfortunately, I drift off to sleep after 5 minutes, and I wake up with a start 35 minutes later, but Lois tells me some of the details I have missed. "Teabag" has quite a monotone style. The program is packed with information, while he shows us large building after large building and tells us the city's history, starting from the Roman Empire up to the end of the 17th century. The main variation in Teabag's style is that he sometimes wears a hat, and sometimes we see his bald head.

When I learnt history in school, our teachers drew very little attention to the Holy Roman Empire. We got the impression that the empire did not make that much difference to the history of England. England's main interest was always only that continental Europe never be ruled by one very powerful country, or one very powerful leader. Otherwise we had a "what's that to us" -attitude - my god!



The main variation in the "Teabag's" style,
is that he sometimes wears a hat, and sometimes we see his bald head - oh dear!

The Holy Roman Empire: England had a
"What's it to us" - attitude - my god!

I must nevertheless admit that the Habsburg dynasty thing helped England on one important point - they twice prevented the Turks from invading Europe.

I recall an old episode of Big Bang Theory where Sheldon and his friends run out of topics of conversation. Sheldon suggests that they all discuss the reasons why the Austrian Archduke was called an archduke, and not an "regular" duke. Unfortunately, Sheldon's friends are not interested in pursuing this matter, so viewers never hear about Sheldon's theories.

Fortunately, "Teabag" gives us tonight the explanation for this interesting issue. It turns out that Rudolf IV thought of the new title in the middle of the 14th century. He was jealous of the other German princes who had the habit of laughing at him and ignoring him. So he decided to forge a document in which it was written that Austrian dukes had always been called "archdukes"  (a brand new word, which Rudolf just cooked up!) . Suddenly the other German princes began to show him some respect - finally!! What madness !!!! But I would nevertheless have preferred to hear Sheldon's theory - damn !!!!

22:00 We are heading for bed, but we stop at the foot of the stairs and listen to the message that Ruth left on our answering machine. Ruth and her husband, Brian (Lois's cousin) have to attend a funeral on Monday in Birmingham. On the way there and on the way home to Bournemouth they want to stay the night with us on Sunday and Monday also. My God!

We will have to clear up a bit in Sarah's old room - no doubt about it! I use the room as my personal changing room and mini-gym. I have my exercise bike in there. And I have laid out in small piles on Sarah’s old double bed the things I want to take with me to Denmark. The room has become a big mess - I have no doubts about that! Damn! But it will be nice to see them both again.

We collapse into bed - zzzzzz !!!!

04:30 I get up early and do one of my routine Danish vocabulary tests.


08:00 I hurry into the kitchen and make two cups of tea. I bring them up to our bedroom and crawl back into our bed. We drink the tea, and afterwards Lois rings Brian and Ruth. Brian, Lois's cousin answers, but after 2 minutes, as always, Ruth, Brian's wife, quickly takes over the conversation from their end.

They plan to eat lunch tomorrow with John, Ruth's brother, who lives near the town of Bath. Then they will drive on to Cheltenham, eat a light dinner and spend the night with us. On Monday, they have to go to Birmingham to attend a funeral. The deceased's family has invited them for lunch before the ceremony. After the funeral, Brian and Ruth will drive home to Bournemouth, but if they turn out to be very tired, they will stay overnight with us again and drive home on Tuesday.

08:30 Lois and I go in the shower and get up. We eat breakfast.

10:00 I begin to clean up a little in Sarah's old room. I move my clothes and other things I have put on Sarah's old double bed into Alison's old room. I move my exercise bike a couple of feet over to the wall. I notice that the clock on Sarah's old bedside table is set for Australian time, so I move it eight hours back. We do not want Ruth and Brian to arrive 8 or 16 hours late for Monday's funeral - I have no doubts about that !!!!

12:30 We eat lunch while we listen to the radio, an interesting program about Ian Fleming, James Bond's creator, and the older woman, Phyllis Bottome, a writer who inspired him.


Fleming rebelled in his youth in the 1930s while he was a student at Eton College - he was already, as a teenager, a naughty boy when it came to girls and cars - my god! His mother got him enrolled in a language school in Austria, run by the writer Phyllis Bottome and her husband, Alban Forbes Dennis, who was MI6's top agent in Austria, Hungary and neighboring countries.

It is strange that Phyllis herself created in her 1946 novel, "Life Line". a hero who was called Mark Chalmers, a British agent who closely resembled James Bond. Fleming wrote his first James Bond novel, Casino Royale, six years later, in 1952.

The writer Phyllis Bottome who inspired Ian Fleming

Phyllis realized that the young Ian Fleming rebelled because he suffered from "perfect big brother" syndrome. His older brother Peter was brilliant, and complied with all of life's traditional rules, so Ian decided he could not compete, and his only option was to be a nuisance to everybody. Phyllis "tamed" Ian by encouraging him to write stories.

It is interesting to me that both Lois and I were "perfect eldest children" who respected the rules. I had a little sister, Kathy, and Lois had a little brother, Andrew. Both Kathy and Andrew were quite naughty children and had the habit of rebelling - my god, what a coincidence!

13:30 I go to bed and take a gigantic afternoon nap - zzzzzz !!!!

15:00 I get up and take a look on the web. I find Morten Ingemann's latest comic strip. The Dane Morten is my favorite cartoonist - no doubt about it! He has many properties that are a must with me and a big plus. He is very interested in ugly, overweight, middle-aged people, the kind of people that most artists rarely give attention to.

He has a real sense of human nature and he often focuses on handling the difficult problems that ugly, overweight, middle-aged people experience in their relationships.

In his latest strip, we see an ugly, overweight middle-aged man talking to his doctor, who is examining him. The man tells the doctor that he would like to live to be over 100. The doctor asked him if he smokes or drinks, or plays, or drives too fast or has a lot of girlfriends. The man can happily answer "no" to all these questions, and he looks so very relieved. He believes that he has passed the test with flying colors - hurrah!

Unfortunately, the story has a bad ending. The doctor reminds the patient that his "healthy" lifestyle is not very pleasant and therefore he has no great motive to live to be over 100. It must have been a bit of a shock to the patient, and I imagine that he came home a little disappointed. Life can be difficult sometimes - I know that for sure !!!!

16:00 We relax with a cup of tea and mince pies on the sofa - yum yum !!!!


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